


The Ties That Bind

by RayllaEndgame



Category: Motherland: Fort Salem (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Spies & Secret Agents, Angst, Angst and Feels, Betrayal, Cuties, Drama, Everyone Needs A Hug, F/F, Family Fluff, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Idiots in Love, Introspection, Romance, Romantic Fluff, Scylla deserved her parents back, Scylla in love, Slow Burn, Soft Raelle Collar, Sometimes memories hurt, Sorry Not Sorry, They're soft but only for each other, Young Love, there will be angst
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-24
Updated: 2021-02-10
Packaged: 2021-03-04 21:08:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 16
Words: 47,302
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25492837
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RayllaEndgame/pseuds/RayllaEndgame
Summary: I suck as summaries so here goes nothing:Raelle Collar and Scylla Ramshorn are just two teenagers trying to navigate life and love but what happens when life and love forces you to choose between them?
Relationships: Abigail Bellweather & Raelle Collar & Tally Craven, Abigail Bellweather/Raelle Collar/Tally Craven/Scylla Ramshorn, Porter & Scylla Ramshorn, Raelle Collar/Scylla Ramshorn, Scylla Ramshorn & Original Male Character
Comments: 110
Kudos: 236





	1. Family

She woke with a start, her mind slowly registering the warm rays illuminating her sleeping form.

She opened her eyes slowly only to snap them closed again with a groan.  _ Why the hell is it always so bright? _

Scylla Ramshorn was many things, but a morning person was not one of them. She rolled to the other side of her bed, ungracefully depositing herself on the floor with a loud  _ THUD. _

“Scylla, honey? Is everything okay up there?”

“It’s fine, mom!” she yelled, a deep throaty chuckle responded. She lay there staring at her ceiling for a few more minutes, heavily considering hitting a mental reset and just going back to bed, her very soft, very tempting bed...a loud ringing derailed that train of thought. Scylla stared at her phone, half considering just ignoring it and going with her earlier plan. Another ring had her sighing heavily and reaching for the device, she pulled it toward her, wondering who on earth had the audacity to be texting her outside of business hours

A smile quickly replaced the scowl as she read the text:

**_Raelle_ ** _ : Good Morning Beautiful <3 _

Well okay, maybe this one time she could make an exception, after all just one thought of eyes bluer than the ocean and arms so strong that offered the gentlest of touches did more for waking her up than any cup of coffee ever could.

**_Scylla_ ** _ : Hey Stranger _

**_Raelle_ ** _ : Stranger? Now is that anyway to talk to the girl who’s about to take you on the best date ever? _

**_Scylla_ ** _ : Best ever huh? Those are some strong words Collar, you sure you got the walk to go with that talk? _

**_Raelle_ ** _ : Guess you’ll have to show up and find out. Pick you up in a bit? _

They texted for a bit longer, Raelle being her charming self and Scylla teasing wherever she could and then, after one final reply telling her she’d be ready in ten, Scylla put her phone down and headed to her closet. She rifled through it for about twenty minutes before finally settling on a light blue sweater and a pair of black jeans as her outfit for the day. A bit more digging and she found a pair of boots to go with them. Satisfied with her work, she heads to the shower to  _ finally  _ get ready.

She checked the time and cursed under her breath, knowing she had to make it quick. She turned the knob on the shower and quickly hopped in, letting the warm water wash away the last remnants of sleep from her muscles and mind.

Satisfied, she got out, went back to her room, got ready and headed downstairs. 

“Well, well, well, look who’s finally decided to grace us with her presence,” she rolled her eyes as she walked into the kitchen. 

“Hilarious dad, no really, you should take this show on the road,”

“No greater audience than you sweetheart,” the taller man said, pushing his black wire frame glasses back up his nose, not missing a beat. 

“Okay that’s enough, you two,” a small figure said as she passed, embracing Scylla as she went. “It’s far too early in the morning for this,” she said, eying their not-so-innocent looks.

“What?” Scylla’s dad asked, taking his plate to the sink, “can’t a father greet his slightly grumpy and possibly overdressed child in the morning?” he said innocently. “Isn’t that a bit much for breakfast, Scyl?” He questioned, taking in Scylla’s dress. She laughed nervously, shoving her hands in her pockets.

_ DING-DONG Saved by the bell...literally. _

She was at the door before the last tone had finished, pulling it open with a smile. 

Raelle, her girlfriend of the last year stood on the other side, a soft smile that was reserved only for Scylla on her lips. They stood there for a moment, drinking each other in. Raelle had worn a dark blue button down, sleeves rolled up to her elbows, along with her favorite ripped jeans and boots. She was as stunning as she was stunned.

“Are you just gonna stand there or was there more to this whole ‘date’ thing I agreed to?” Scylla teased, a knowing smirk on her lips, “Not that I’m complaining of course, the view’s still pretty nice”. 

Raelle blinked, shaking her head as she embraced her girlfriend. “Hi, beautiful” she smiled, punctuating the greeting with a kiss.

Reaching up to cup her cheek, Scylla leaned into the kiss, deepening it and sighed; who needed coffee when she had all the pick me up she needed right here in her arms?

Time ceased to have meaning as they stood in their own little world in the doorway of the Ramshorn residence. After what seemed like an eternity, Raelle broke the kiss but not the embrace, leaning her forehead against the brunette’s. “I missed you, too,” she chuckled and Scylla rolled her eyes but didn’t deny the statement.

They stood, staying encased in their little bubble for a bit longer before they were brought back to reality by the sound of someone clearing their throat. 

Raelle looked over her girlfriend’s shoulder and straightened her stance before leaning away and grabbing Scylla’s hand instead.

“M- Mr. Ramshorn,” she stuttered.

“Raelle,” he greeted, eyeing the blonde.

“M- mornin’ sir” she offered her hand, which he stared at for a couple seconds.

Scylla chuckled beside her, giving her hand a reassuring squeeze. “Dad, will you stop messing with her?” Raelle gave Scylla a confused look that was quickly replaced by comprehension as she looked up and saw the mischievous glint in the older Ramshorn’s eyes, just before he laughed and batted Raelle’s hand away in favor of a hug. 

_ Well okay then...now I know where she gets it from,  _ Raelle thought, returning the older man’s embrace. “Great to see you as always sir,” she said as he moved away from the embrace.

“Is that Raelle I hear?” Scylla’s mom, now peering around her husband fixed her with a welcoming smile. “Oh how are you honey?” she asks, also giving Raelle a hug. 

Scylla rolls her eyes at the whole scene, “Ok, ok, can we please not crush my girlfriend?” her mom chuckled, “Well we wouldn’t have to if you brought her over more often,”

“She’s right, you guys don’t let me win at scrabble  _ nearly  _ as much, I mean-” her dad stops abruptly, gasping and clutching his chest in faux horror “Are you embarrassed of us?” he asked.

Raelle looked on, watching her girlfriend roll her eyes and reassure her parents she wasn’t...she also watched her girlfriend’s pale skin burn fiery red a moment later, hearing something about her talking in her sleep? Scylla’s eyes darted to Raelle and back as she hushed that conversation and began shoving her out the door.

“Aaaand that’s enough of that, I’ll be back later okay?” she ushered Raelle out the door, giving her mom and dad a quick hug and saying a quiet goodbye to her sleeping baby brother who Raelle hadn’t noticed was strapped to Mrs. Ramshorn’s back. Dark hair and pale eyelids hiding azure blue eyes, the little guy was cute...when he wasn’t screaming at the top of his lungs.

With one final hug and a kiss on the cheek from her dad, Scylla finally left the house, dragging Raelle with her. “Be safe, you two!” her mom yelled from the front porch, followed by a deeper “Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do!”. 

“Love you, too!” Scylla yelled over her shoulder as they got to the car. Raelle stopped by the passenger side, opening Scylla’s door for her before running around to hop into the driver’s seat.

She clicked her seatbelt into place, reached over to give Scylla a quick peck, turned her keys in the ignition and then they were off.

“So,” Scylla said, tearing her eyes away from the passing scenery to look over at her gorgeous driver, “where  _ exactly _ are you taking me?”

Raelle glanced at her, a smirk on her lips, “What? Are you nervous?” she teased. A quirked eyebrow was her only answer and she smiled, shaking her head. “Don’t worry beautiful, you’ll love it, I promise.” she took her right hand off the wheel, placing it face up on the center console, an invitation that Scylla promptly took, lacing their fingers together.

She lifted their entwined hands placing a kiss on the back of Scylla’s, eliciting a contented hum from the other girl before she focused her attention back on the quiet green and red flashes as they drove.

Scylla would never admit it, but without meaning to Raelle had been half right. Of course she wasn’t nervous about their date, she was never nervous around Raelle...well...not  _ that _ type of nervous anyways. But all morning, she’d just had a strange feeling in her gut, a quiet ball of nerves that refused to uncoil that she just couldn’t shake, but here, in the warmth of Raelle’s car, with their hands intertwined and Raelle rubbing quiet, calming circles on the back of her hand, she resolved to ignore it and just enjoy whatever surprise Raelle had planned for her. 

As they drove, her gaze swept over blonde locks and blue eyes once more, a contented smile spreading across her lips as Raelle looked over. 

“See something you like?” she teased. 

“Oh, always,” Scylla replied, reaching over to place a kiss on her girlfriend's cheek, nipping her ear, “but I don’t think that’s a conversation best had while you're driving, do you?” Raelle hid a shudder and smiled as Scylla resettled in her seat, all knowing looks and smirks, before focusing her attention back on the road.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok, so that was the first chapter!  
> Please excuse any mistakes or inconsistencies while I dust off my writer's hat, it's been a while.
> 
> I hope you guys enjoyed it!  
> Comments, kudos etc are always appreciated and chase away my anxieties :)
> 
> Last but not least, HUGE thanks to Dylan for agreeing to be my beta reader and making sure this all makes sense.


	2. True Love...or something like that

She was speechless, and not just because the hike to get here left her more than a little winded. 

The place Raelle took her to was a meadow of sorts. Bright reds and pinks intermingled with the soft, earthy tones of the greens and browns. It was breathtaking.

Raelle walked silently beside the brunette, watching her take it all in, watching the emotions as they crossed her face, committing them all to memory as if they were the most vital of secrets.

Not many people got to see this side of Scylla. To others she was still charming and funny, but moments like these where her heart and all her emotions were laid bare to see were reserved just for Raelle. She was honored.

“How did you find this place?” she asked, bringing Raelle out of her musings.

“Oh, well, I was looking for a new trail to run and um,” she paused, scratching the back of her neck, “I uh, may not have been paying as much attention as I should have been and got a little lost on the way back to my car.” 

Scylla laughed as she shook her head, “And how many times does that happen daily?”

Raelle huffed, “Hey, I always come back, don’t I?” 

Scylla looked at her fondly, “Yes, yes you do.” Raelle looked over at her then, the sky meeting the waves as they shared some deep emotion neither of their vessels had yet named, intense and unyielding. 

As if waking from a spell, Scylla looked away again, clearing her throat, “So,” she started, “you got lost and found a magical oasis just outside the concrete jungle?” Raelle grinned,  _ goddess how she loved that grin _ . 

“Yeah, something like that. Anyway, I was too tired to go back, so I figured I’d find a place to catch my breath for a bit,” Scylla nodded, listening but keeping her eyes on the changing terrain below their feet. “I walked around for a while until I found this meadow and well,” she paused, pulling Scylla to a stop before parting the green curtain in their path, “here we are.” Raelle announced.

The walk here had been gorgeous on its own, the colors mixing and melding into each other creating a kind of harmony all its own, but if the path here was a melody, the meadow was a symphony. Where the forest had earthy greens and browns, the meadow was a cacophony of yellows and pinks and reds. The sunlight filtering through the trees gave even the green of the grass beneath their feet an ethereal glow, almost unreal.

Raelle led them to a towering oak tree, its branches spread wide as if acting as the protector of this sacred space. Beneath its canopy, at its base, Scylla spied a blanket laid out beneath an assortment of baskets and containers. She smirked, looking up at her not-so-secret romantic of a girlfriend, she shook her head,  _ only her _ . “So,” she started as they approached the blanket, “a picnic in a secret magical garden, huh?”

“Yes ma’am,” she crouched down to the blanket, pulling Scylla down beside her. 

“What? ‘Dinner and a movie’ not up to your standards?” she teased arranging herself into a comfortable position. 

“Only the best for you Scyl,” Raelle said, in earnest. Scylla looked up then, locking eyes with the blonde as she continued, “you deserve a little magic in your life every now and then.”

Scylla rolled her eyes but couldn’t help the slight flutter in her chest that came whenever her girlfriend said things like that, whenever she  _ looked _ at her like that. She could feel a blush forming and she shifted her focus, “So, do tell, what exactly does one eat on a magical forest date?” 

Raelle chuckled, going along with it. “Well,” she started, reaching for one of the containers, “for our guest of honor,” a slight bow of her head to Scylla accenting her presentation before she pulled the lid off with a  _ *pop* _ , Scylla hid her smile behind her hand as she peered into the plastic container, “Grilled cheese?”

“Yes ma’am, best in town, won’ find better this side of county line,” she paused then, eyebrows knitting together in thought, “I know it’s no gourmet meal but-”

“Shhh,” Scylla hushed, taking the blonde’s face in her hands, forcing her thoughts away from whatever track they were going down, “Hey, look at me,” she coaxed, stroking the thin white line that adorned Raelle’s jaw until she met her gaze. “I love it, it’s perfect, just like you.” They both smiled at that. 

“Well,  _ now _ who’s the charmer?” Raelle said, leaning closer, cloudy thoughts all but forgotten, Scylla’s smile widened.

“Still you babe” she said, before pulling her girlfriend in and pressing her lips to hers. Raelle’s hand left the blanket below, moving to grasp Scylla’s chin between her thumb and forefinger, keeping the older girl in place. The kiss dragged on, both girls pouring every ounce of love and adoration they had for each other into every movement of their lips. Raelle’s tongue slid against Scylla’s bottom lip, questioning, seeking entry, bringing with it a familiar heat that grew in their cores and filled the space between them. 

A low growl startled the girls, forcing them apart. Realizing where the sound had come from, Raelle chuckled and that blush Scylla hid only moments ago came back with a vengeance. 

_Seriously???_ _The ONE TIME I skip breakfast,_ Scylla mentally face palmed, her breath returning to normal. As if reading her mind, Raelle placed one final kiss on her cheek before leaning away and offering her the sandwiches.

“How about we pick this up a little later? Preferably when we’re both fed and- OH” Scylla watched as Raelle dug around in the larger of the two baskets, eventually producing a thermos.

Seeing her questioning gaze, Raelle unscrewed the top and poured the light brown liquid into it, offering it to her girlfriend.

She quickly accepted the metal cup, already knowing what was inside (she would know that smell anywhere). Scylla hummed in pleasure as the liquid warmed her throat, a familiar buzz settling in as it went. Raelle watched in amusement as she pulled out her own food and drink next. “I figured you wouldn’t have time this morning and well...a non-caffeinated Scylla is not one we need to unleash on an unsuspecting public” she laughed as Scylla swatted at her arm. 

Scylla gave Raelle a look of gratitude as she took another swig, relishing in the feel of the warm drink as it ran down her throat. Satisfied, and decently caffeinated, she followed Raelle’s lead and went back to her food, chatting and occasionally flirting as they ate.

**__________________________**

They had mostly finished eating save for one final piece of Raelle’s dad’s famous blueberry pie that, regardless of Raelle’s most valiant efforts, and to Scylla’s great amusement, she just couldn’t eat. Giving up on the food, Raelle flopped down onto the blanket with a huff, her head in Scylla’s lap. “Now, now,” she giggled, “no need to get all grumpy babe” she said, placing a kiss on that little crinkle in the blonde’s forehead, smiling to herself when it smoothed under her touch.

“ ‘M not grumpy” Raelle groused, staring at the dish as if it had committed some great offense. 

Scylla laughed, “Of course not, it’s not like you’re giving the tupperware container the death glare right now, not at all.” Raelle grumbled and rolled her eyes but said nothing. 

They sat in silence for a while, as Scylla, lost in thought absentmindedly ran her hand through blonde curls just the way her girlfriend liked. Raelle relaxed under the older girl’s ministrations, her mind at peace under a ‘magical’ tree with the girl she loved. 

“What’re you thinking about?” she asked, bringing a hand to Scylla’s cheek, pulling her out of her thoughts. 

Scylla smiled, leaning into the gesture, “You...us”, she said, looking down to the girl in her lap. “All good things, I promise,” she amended, seeing the furrow in Raelle’s brow. “I just,” she sighed, looking away as if trying to find the words she needed among the trees. Raelle sat up then, leaning in to Scylla's side, offering her silent support while her girlfriend gathered her thoughts. “Thank you,” she breathed, looking up at the blonde once again. 

“For what?” Raelle asked, urging her to continue.

“For this,” she gestured to their picnic, “for being  _ you _ ,” she continued, placing a hand on the blonde’s cheek, “everything”. Raelle’s heart swelled at the absolute love she could see in Scylla’s eyes mirroring the look she undoubtedly had in her own. 

As if on instinct, she leaned in closer to the brunette, leaving only an inch of space between them, “You make it easy Scyl,” she whispered before bringing their lips together. The kiss was tender and sweet, it had heat but none of the urgency of their previous one. Scylla pulled away first but stayed just close enough to keep their foreheads pressed together. 

“I love you, Raelle,” she whispered into the air between them, “so much.”

Without hesitation Raelle responded, “I love you too Scyl,” and with that they were crashing together once more, Scylla’s back pressed against the tree as Raelle took a different position on her lap, giving herself more leverage as slender fingers wove their way through dark locks. Raelle pressed her fingers to the back of Scylla’s neck, slowly massaging the muscles there as their lips continued to slide against each other in a long perfected rhythm.

Their surroundings no longer have shape nor meaning to the lovers, lost in each other and the feeling of love between them.

**__________________________**

Somewhere off in the distance, a young girl’s life was being forever altered, her destiny changed, maybe even her heart broken.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AH I love writing fluffy Raylla, they're so cute and let's be honest, i'm just out here manifesting the softness i want to see in canon :)
> 
> Hope you guys enjoyed!
> 
> As always comments, kudos etc are always appreciated because they chase my anxieties away :)  
> And again huge thanks to my beta reader for making sure this all makes sense.


	3. Raelle

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> And we have a time jump ladies and gentlemen!  
> Ok quick notes:  
> \- it's been about 10 years since the events of the last chapter  
> \- Raelle is now one of the FBI's best and brightest agents along with her squad  
> PS: This chapter's a little bit longer than my previous ones, hope you don't mind.  
> Okay enjoy!

“Everyone in position?” Abigail asked, listening for confirmation from her unit mates before moving in. 

They had been casing this guy for months trying to find evidence of his connection to the Spree, and after all those late night stakeouts, they’d finally gotten the proof they needed and had received orders to move in. Tonight.

“I’m in position Abi, ready when you are.” 

Abigail released a sigh, waiting for the rest of her unit to get in place, preparing herself for what was to come. A few more seconds passed but the line remained quiet. Abigail’s brows furrowed in confusion. Last she checked, there were three of them on this mission, _where’s Raelle?_ , she thought, frustration and anxiety fighting for dominance in her mind.

She took a steadying breath before touching the small earpiece that served as their sole line of communication. “Raelle, come in...” she waited but got no answer. “Rae? Come in...” still nothing. Aggravation adding to the mix of emotions in her gut, she touched her earpiece one more time, her tone a little (or a lot) less calm this time. “Shitbird, I swear to the goddess if you don’t-” a laugh sounded over the comms, interrupting her tirade.

“Easy Bells,” Raelle chuckled, “Stop worrying so much will ya? I’m in position.”

There was a retort dancing on the edge of Abigail’s tongue but she bit it back, deciding the mission was more important. She closed her eyes, taking a steadying breath as she prepared for battle. “Okay, this is a stealth mission guys. We go in, grab the target and get out before anyone notices, got it?”

“Got it,” the two girls chorused.

“Okay, on my mark, three,” the girls steadied themselves, all teasing gone, replaced by a single-minded focus, “two,” their eyes trained on the window where their target lay unaware of their approach “one,” their muscles tensed as they approached the window, crouching on either side, weapons at the ready, adrenaline and years of training coursing through them “Okay go-”

“AHH!” all three girls exclaimed as a bright white light flashed before their eyes. Blinking rapidly in an attempt to refocus, they could barely make out the shape that burst through the window and darted down the fire escape. Groaning from the stinging in their eyes, they got to their feet, a little off balance and disoriented. Abigail looked over the side of the fire escape trying to regain visual contact with the target. 

“There!” Tally pointed, squinting as her eyes refocused. Cries of protest followed the path the redhead pointed out as their target very conspicuously wove his way through the crowd. With nothing more than a nod of understanding, the three girls took off, giving chase.

**_______________**

“HE’S GETTING AWAY!”

Her words were barely carried over the wind rushing through Tally’s ears as they gave chase to yet another bad guy insistent on making their jobs harder than it needed to be.

“Why...do they always... _run?_ ” she panted, trying to keep pace with Abigail as they wove through the crowded streets, keeping eyes on their target. “Maybe it has to do with the whole ‘jailed for life’ thing,” she paused, _hold on, something’s missing here,_ risking a glance behind her she groaned when she saw who was _not_ with them.

_Dammit, shitbird!_

“Where’s Raelle?” Tally gave a half hearted shrug as she quickened her pace once more seeing their target turn a corner.

They were inches from breaking the corner themselves when they heard a shout followed by a loud thud. Pausing only to give each other a look of concern, they pulled out their weapons, carefully rounding the corner only to heave a sigh of relief a second later as they saw Raelle, now straddling the Spree agent, giving him one solid punch and knocking him out.

Securing the handcuffs on his wrists, Raelle glanced up at her partners with a smirk, “Hey guys, what took you so long?”

Tally shook her head and Abigail just rolled her eyes. “Where have you been shitbird? We thought we lost you back there.” 

Raelle stood, pulling the suspect along with her before she answered, “I figured while _you guys_ were chasing him head on I could use some of the alleyways to cut him off...” she shrugged. “it worked.”

Abigail scoffed, “And what if it didn’t? What if you ran into a dead end?”

“But I didn’t,” she answered simply, “and it _did_ work.”

Abigail looked like she was about to say something else but before she could, Tally stepped between the two. “Okay guys,” she said, grabbing one of the suspect’s arms, “how about we get him back to base? Preferably _before_ he makes us chase him around the city again?”

Both girls directed their attention away from each other and toward the redhead before nodding in agreement.

A few hours later, the Spree agent was booked, processed and headed for interrogation. “Nice work ladies,” the trio turned at the voice, “the world is a safer place because of what you did today.” Special Agent Anacostia Quartermaine, their leader, approached them with a look that, if they didn’t know better, would almost resemble pride in her eyes. “I think you girls have earned the night off, use it,” she said as she came to a halt before them. “get some rest, we have a lot of work ahead of us and I need you three at your best, am I understood?” 

“Yes ma’am”, the three girls responded in unison, and if Anacostia’s eyes lingered a bit longer as they passed over Raelle, the blonde pretended not to notice. 

“Dismissed.”

The three girls watched her leave before turning and heading to the locker room themselves.

“Holy crap, you guys,” Tally began as they were gathering their things, “can you believe we _actually_ caught a Spree agent? And a live one at that?” It was true, they had gotten close many times before but those cases usually ended in the agents either disappearing or choosing death over capture, much to their continued annoyance.

“Yeah, I wonder if they’ll get anything out of him,” Abigail mused.

“Hopefully, this would be the only solid lead we’d have on them in years,” Tally said as Abigail nodded along. After a moment of silent contemplation, the redhead turned her focus on Raelle who had been silent during this entire exchange. “So, Rae,” she began, drawing the blonde’s attention, “are you gonna actually come out with us tonight?” 

Raelle looked up, not meeting Tally’s eyes, “Tal-”

“Come _on_ , it’ll be fun,” she goads, “besides, we deserve it after the day we’ve had,” she finishes, aligning an arm over Abigail’s shoulders as she nods along. “We can even go to that one bar, you know, the one where the bartender mercilessly flirts with you and you pretend not to notice?”

Raelle’s face heats up at that. “Wha- she does not!”

Abigail snorts at that, “Of course she doesn’t, just like she doesn’t feed you free drinks everytime we go, like a frat boy to a freshman.”Tally giggles at that.

Raelle smiles in spite of herself and shakes her head, “I’m just not in the mood for a night out tonight guys. I’m sorry...raincheck?” 

The two girls roll their eyes at that. It wasn’t so much that they hadn’t expected this answer, if they were being honest, in the five years they had known Raelle she hadn’t been much for the night life, the times they _had_ managed to drag her out, it was like pulling teeth and had taken lots of pleading and a few of Tally’s famous puppy dog eyes for good measure.

Instead of voicing her thoughts, however, she adopted a more teasing demeanor. “Fine,” she said, laying a hand on Tally’s shoulder, “be boring”. Seeming to get the message, Tally sighed and gathered up her things, Abigail following suit. As she pulled the zipper on her bag closed, she caught Raelle shooting her a grateful look and she smiled back, “Just don’t come complaining to us when you’re old and grey at the ripe old age of 30, shitbird,” she said shoving her shoulder. 

Raelle chuckled, “Don’t worry about me Bells, after all, I’m sure you’ll have enough ‘fun’ for all of us”. Abigail wiggled her eyebrows at the suggestion before patting her friend on the shoulder and heading out the door. Tally gave her a tight hug from behind as she passed, Raelle squeezing her arm.

“The invite’s open if you change your mind, okay?” Tally whispered.

“Yeah, I know Tal, thanks,” Raelle said, patting the redhead’s arm as she released her. With one more look over her shoulder, and a nod from Raelle, Tally turned and followed Abigail out the door.

Finally alone, Raelle sighed, closing her eyes and taking a deep breath letting it fill her lungs and her body, relaxing her muscles before she, too, gathered her things and left.

**_______________**

“This movie _SUCKS._ ” Raelle said to no one in particular as she flipped the channel for maybe the thousandth time that night. 

_It’s probably because you’ve seen it 5 million times. Why didn’t you just go out with your friends?_

_You know why._

And she did, it had been the same for years now, ever since she walked into that house, the house that had felt like a second home to her for so long. The house where the woman she loved had lived, where four pairs of arms never failed to lift her up after a particularly bad day. Where azure eyes and a soft smile made her heart soar like no one ever had, like no one ever has since that day.

Raelle tried to shake the thoughts from her head, the memories that threatened to crack the careful wall she had methodically built up over the years. She tried to forget, oh how she tried, the line of broken hearts left in her wake could attest to that, but regardless of her efforts, it was never the same. Soft kisses and an even softer voice always made their way into her consciousness.

She took another swig from the beer she had been nursing for a while, hoping that the soft buzz would dull her senses just enough for the memories to fade, for her mind and her heart to have enough peace for the night.

_CRASH!_

Raelle’s head jerked toward the direction of the sound, effectively pulling her out of her reverie. She crouched down low in an effort to mask the sound of her approach. She crept over to the drawer she knew held her weapon, always loaded, always ready, before heading off in the direction she had heard the noise.

On her path she cleared each and every room, corner and crevice, just as her training had drilled into her over the years, until finally coming to the last door, a bathroom in the hall. 

Raelle approached the door, weapon drawn, careful not to make a single sound so as to retain her element of surprise. She laid her hand on the doorknob, the cold of the metal steeling her nerves and sharpening her mind, or maybe it was just the adrenaline running through her veins, preparing her for what came next.

In one smooth movement, Raelle swung the door open and dove into the room preparing for a fight...but it never came. The room was empty, no one and nothing there except for her very confused reflection staring back at her. _What the hell? Then what on earth made that-_

Her blood went cold as realization hit, “No,” she ran back to her room, flinging the door open and diving for the rug just beside her bed. The rug, covering the loose floorboard that hid her safe. A safe that held a good chunk of very classified intel about Raelle’s team and the FBI’s plans for the Spree. A safe, that was now empty. “No, no, no, no, no,” she lamented, “ _dammit_ ” she yelled, pacing back and forth across the room as the adrenaline became too much to bear.

“ _FUCK!_ ” she screamed, kicking the door to the safe closed and flopping down on her bed, her face in her hands, a feeling of dread creeping over her entire body.

She sat there for a few minutes, trying to calm herself, trying to plan and get her thoughts in order as a million questions flitted through her head, most of all _how._ How did they know where the files were? How did they know she had them? How did they even get _in_ here? (A soft breeze from her usually closed window answered that one.) But most of all, how did they even know the combination to get into her safe? She kept that code so secret not even Abigail or Tally knew it. She sighed, _guess it doesn’t matter now,_ she thought, rubbing her forehead to try to soothe her oncoming headache. _There’s only one thing left to do._

She nodded to herself as she made her way over to the nightstand where her phone lay. She picked up the device and dialed the number she needed, hoping they would still be up and conscious enough to answer. On the third or so ring a slightly groggy voice answered. 

_Okay...not up. At least they’re conscious though._

“He...Hello?” a semi-asleep Bellwether answered.

“Abs, where’s Tally?” Raelle asked, having no time for pleasantries.

“Raelle? Do you know what time it is?”

“Yes, I do, now where’s Tally? I need you two to get here like yesterday.”

She could hear Abigail shifting on the other side of the phone, the urgency in her voice finally breaking through the haze of sleep. “What’s going on?” she asked, her voice now devoid of all grogginess. Raelle opened her mouth then closed it again, not sure if this line of communication was even secure, not sure if _anything_ was secure anymore.

“I can’t tell you over the phone,” she answered instead, “just grab Tally and meet at my place in ten.”

The Bellwether paused, assessing her partner's tone for a few seconds before responding, “Okay.” With that, Raelle hung up. She looked at her watch as the seconds ticked by, her nervous energy returning. A low growl escaped her lips as she shot up and headed for the now open window, closing it and securing the lock before deciding to make her way around the house to make sure there were no other ports of entry.

This was going to be a _long_ night.

**_______________**

She sat perched on a roof across the street, catching her breath and steadying her nerves.

“You almost got caught,” a voice chided.

“But I didn’t,” she responded, her jaw clenched, holding back a sarcastic retort that was sure to change the tone and course of this conversation. The voice on the other end of her comms huffed, clearly not pleased.

“Did you get it?” it asked.

“Of course.”

“Good, get to the safehouse and await further instructions.”

“I’m on my way.” 

“Oh, and Scylla?” the voice called, it’s tone morphing from calm into one of warning. Scylla froze but stayed silent, waiting to hear what came next. “Do be careful, I don’t have to tell you what would happen if you were to get caught.” The communications shut off, leaving Scylla alone in the cold night air, a thinly veiled threat her only companion.

She sighed, checking her bag one more time just to make sure the files were still there. Satisfied, she stood, getting ready to make her way to the extraction point but something stopped her. She turned, giving this ‘distraction’ her full attention. 

The brunette crouched back down, keeping her presence hidden as she watched the lithe form of the woman she loved, _the woman you STILL love,_ an annoying voice chided, run back and forth across her apartment securing every window and door as she went.

As she watched, memories slammed into her like a freight train, ripping at old wounds she had spent years trying to stitch together, giving strength to hopes, and dreams, and plans that were lost to her now. 

Closing her eyes in resignation, Scylla let a single tear fall in mourning for her old life, her old possibilities, before slipping on a cool mask and climbing down, disappearing into the night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The plot thickens!  
> I know, i'm late but hurricanes seem to have no respect for art.
> 
> I hope you guys enjoyed it!  
> Again, comments, kudos etc chase my anxieties away and are much appreciated :)  
> And huge thanks to my awesome beta reader who makes sure i make sense.
> 
> Till next time <3


	4. Scylla

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wrote this chapter while fighting through some pretty heavy writer's block so i'm not 100% sure about it but here is!  
> Feel free to lmk what you think, and thanks for reading!!

It was a long trek back to the safehouse and most of it was spent dodging traffic cameras and ducking into alleyways to confuse anyone who might be following her but, a few hours and a stolen car later, Scylla made it.

She approached the house taking in her surroundings. It wasn’t much, a few planks of wood strewn together in a house-like shape painted in a color even more muted than its appearance. 

_That’s probably by design,_ Scylla thought. After all, it wouldn't be much of a ‘safe’ house if it drew the eyes of every passerby, now would it? Scylla steeled herself before opening its creaking gate and making her way up the steps. As she approached, she could see there was a single figure lounging against the porch. 

The woman looked up as Scylla approached, giving her a once over before settling back on her face, watching her as she made her way toward the house. “The way over is under,” the woman said, looking at Scylla expectantly.

“The way out is in.” Satisfied, the woman waved her in, turning her attention back to the street.

Having apparently passed the test, she advanced toward the door of the house, pausing as she got to the door. Taking a deep breath, she readied herself for whatever lay beyond the threshold. Taking another steadying breath, she twisted the handle and stepped inside, but before she could make sense of her surroundings, everything went black.

**_______________**

She woke to darkness, a cold feeling shooting up her spine as she scrambled for something, anything to make sense of her surroundings and-

That’s when she heard it. A large door, metal from the sound of it swung open, footsteps echoing in the air around her as it swung closed.

A low chuckle made its way to her ears before a familiar voice followed suit. “Well Well, looks like someone’s awake.” She rolled her eyes, _of course,_ she thought. Without warning, the hood was removed from her head, the sudden influx of light causing her to hiss as her eyes burned, trying to adjust.

“Asshole,” she grumbled, eliciting another laugh from the young man before her.

“What? Not a fan of my hospitality?”

She flexed her hands, realizing for the first time that they were tied behind her.

She scoffed, “Oh no, I love what you’ve done to the place, very modern prison chic,” she paused, flexing her wrists again. “I think the cuffs are a bit much though,” she finished, sarcasm dripping from every syllable.

Porter huffed, reaching into his pocket before producing a small key. “Ha, yeah, sure, I don’t think the guy whose nose you broke last time would think so, Ramshorn.” She smiled in spite of herself, adopting the most innocent expression she could manage. 

“Hey, that wasn’t my fault,” he looked up over her shoulder, giving her an incredulous look. “What? You can’t exactly expect me to not be a little defensive after walking into a room, having a hood thrown over my head and being dragged to some unknown location by an unknown man, it was honestly self-defense.” 

He snorted, twisting the key in the cuffs and freeing her hands. She sighed in relief, bringing her hands around and rubbing at her wrists. “Also, Porter,” she paused, taking his offered hand, using it to anchor herself as she stood “did you _really_ have to put ‘em on so tight?”

He smiled apologetically as they made their way toward the door, “Yeah, sorry about that Scyl,” she grimaced at the familiar nickname...and the memory of another blonde who used to use it but quickly recovered before he noticed. He continued, “I was just _really_ not in the mood for a bloody nose today.”

“Yeah, yeah,” she said, stepping through the door and down the long hallway to the Spree’s main base of operations.

When they reached the end of the hall, he held the door open for her allowing her to go first. It never ceased to amaze her how different the main area of the base looked from the hallways leading up to it. Where they were quiet and somber, no doubt in an effort to cow anyone who had the misfortune of getting on the Spree’s bad side, the main area almost felt...homey, well, as homey as something can feel with the sounds of sparring and weapons training ringing through the halls. As impressive as the inside was, Scylla had no doubt that the outside was the complete opposite, not that she had the pleasure of ever seeing it, she frowned at the thought.

How long had it been? Five years? Six, since she’d joined the organization?

_Maybe more,_ she thought, and still, it was always the same, complete the mission, go to the rendezvous point, get black bagged until she was safely inside the base. The most information she’d gathered after all this time was that there was definitely a town not too far away and the only reason she even knew _that_ much was because she had overheard some of the agents talking about some even there once when she was being brought in.

_Where’s the trust?_ She sighed and Porter looked at her quizzically. She opened her mouth to explain but her words were cut off by a pair of strong arms that came up from behind and spun her around. “Big Sister!!”

She rolled her eyes and smiled, all defensiveness leaving her body as she wriggled out of the embrace. “Sai,” she admonished, “what did I tell you about sneaking up on me?”

He at least had the decency to look sheepish as he responded, “Um...not to?” 

She waited, but he didn’t go on, “And?” she prodded.

“ _And,_ ” he continued with a look of innocence in his eyes, “I missed you?”

She shook her head, deflated, she could never _really_ be mad at him, though she did give it the good old college try from time to time. “Whatever, dork,” she said, mussing his ebony hair.

“Wha- hey!” he protested, reaching up to fix it. She laughed, pulling him into a proper embrace. They lingered there for a while, just enjoying the feeling of being together, like they were each others’ only anchor in this world and, for all intents and purposes, they were. Ever since that day so long ago, the day that still haunted both their nightmares, they were all each other had. I mean, sure Scylla had Porter, sort of, but it wasn’t the same, nothing could fill the hole in her heart. Nothing could replace _them_. 

Recoiling from the line her thoughts had started to go down, Scylla retreated from the embrace, keeping her hands on her brother’s shoulders as she appraised him. 

_Jeez ,when did he get so tall...and strong? He lifted me like it was nothing._

“Hey, guess what?” he said, matching pace with his sister as they continued their walk.

“Tell me.”

“The boss said I’m doing extremely well in training.” She grimaced. That was the last thing she wanted to hear, the whole reason she was doing this was to keep her baby brother out of it.

_He’s not a baby anymore._

_Maybe not, but he’s still my brother and it’s too dangerous._

_Is that why you do it?_

_Not the same and you know it I just...don’t want to lose him, I can’t._

Distantly she became aware of her name being called. She shook her head, refocusing, “I’m sorry what?”

“Did you hear what I said?” he looked at her excitedly, “the boss thinks I could be ready for my first mission!” Her steps stuttered and she stumbled a bit into Porter, who she had all but forgotten was still with them, barely managing to stay on her feet. 

“That...That’s great Sai,” she said halfheartedly. He began musing and theorizing about all the types of missions he might get picked for and, perhaps sensing her inability to continue this conversation, Porter took over, listening intently to the younger Ramshorn and trading smiles and the occasional high-five while his sister recovered.

“Ramshorn!” came the booming voice and then, silence as the trainees paused in their fighting and all the agents formerly milling about slowed in their movements as if in anticipation of...something. 

The two siblings turned in the direction from which the sound came, facing the tall, imposing figure approaching them. As he got closer, the group straightened, hands behind their back, the picture of military excellence...well...as close as they could get considering the Spree were as far from the military as you could get.

He stopped before them, tilting his head off to the side, a clear dismissal. Porter took the hint, giving a slight nod before turning on his heels and walking away. Scylla watched him go from the corner of her eye, a slight smile on her lips as he surreptitiously gave her a quick thumbs up before quickening his pace and disappearing among the cadets who had continued their various activities.

“Welcome home, Scylla,” he said, focusing his attention back on the duo.

“Thank you, sir,” she cleared her throat, suddenly nervous under his appraising eye, not that she would ever let it show. “It’s good to be back.”

He hummed, his eyes flickering toward the younger Ramshorn before settling back on Scylla. She had a bad feeling about this. “Come,” he ordered as he turned and walked toward the direction he had come from. The siblings spared each other a second’s glance before hurriedly falling into step behind their leader. “I trust your mission went well?” he asked, despite already knowing the answer.

“Yes, sir,” she confirmed, retrieving the files from her satchel, “the files, as requested.” She finished, handing them to him as they walked.

He took them, opening the first one and skimming through its pages as he entered his office. Silas held the door for his sister as they entered and closed the door behind them. 

The silence stretch on for a few more minutes as he read, Scylla trying her best not to fidget, not to wonder what was going on in his head, but before her thoughts spiralled any further, she heard the faint brush of paper against paper as he closed the files and gestured for them to take a seat. Scylla followed the silent request, her brother mere steps behind her. The boss leaned forward in his chair, resting his elbows on the desk between them, his fingers pressed together. 

“Good work, Ramshorn.”

“Thank you, sir.”

“These files will be invaluable to us, help us maintain the upper hand against our enemies and keep our agents safe.” Scylla nodded along but something about that statement gnawed at the back of her head. _How could these files help them against their enemies if the person she took them from was-_

_No,_ she shook off the thought, there had to be a reason behind it, after all, they were the good guys, right?

_Maybe she didn’t know._

_Maybe..._ though even as she thought them, the words felt paper thin. She focused back on the man before her as he walked around to lean on the desk before the two siblings, leaning in close as if afraid what he was about to say would be overheard by anyone but them.

“Listen, we’ve received intel that the FBI is planning something big, something not even some of its highest ranking officers don’t even know about,” Scylla gritted her teeth at that, of course they were, all the secrecy, the lies, all they ever did was plan and destroy and take, leaving whoever was left behind to pick up the pieces.

“When?” she ground out, clenching her fists in an attempt to keep her anger in check.

He sighed, “We don’t know, what we do know is there are very few people with the intel we need in order to find out.” She nodded along, waiting for more, for something that would explain her place in all this.

“Okay, so what do we do?”

“Not we, Scylla, you,” she blinked, “you two will be going undercover and-”

“Wait”, she said looking up at her boss and blanching a bit as she realized what she had just done.

_Too late now, may as well keep going._

“You _two?_ ”

“Yes,” he walked over and placed a hand on the younger Ramshorn’s shoulder. “Silas here has been excelling at all levels in his training, I see no reason why he shouldn’t be able to accompany you on a simple recon mission, do you?” His voice was calm but his eyes dared her to challenge him, she looked at her brother who was positively beaming at the opportunity. 

_Damnit._

She had tried for years to keep him out of this, to keep him safe and away from all the fighting, the lies, the _death_ that came with being an agent in the field but as the years passed, he just became more and more enamored with the idea. She knew this day might come eventually but she had hoped that maybe they would have taken down her parents’ killers by then. Maybe by then she could have left the Spree, given him a chance at a life different from her own where he wasn’t burdened by harsh decisions and even harsher truths. Where he could grow, and learn and find love like a normal kid. But that wasn’t the case. The day had come and there was nothing she could do about it, her only hope was that this mission was as simple as advertised, that she could keep him out of any real danger.

She fought to keep her thoughts off her face under the boss’ watchful eyes as he searched her face.

“Excellent!” he exclaimed, walking back around to his desk, seemingly satisfied with what he found, or rather _didn’t_ find. The door behind them swung open and a smaller boy about Silas’ age entered, Hunter was his name, if Scylla recalled correctly. He gave a brief nod to them both before handing some papers to the boss. “Ah, yes, thank you,” he said, handing them to Scylla as he waved a dismissive hand at the boy. “This is the address at which you’ll be staying,” he explained, “you two are already related so we figured having you pose as siblings would work just fine. You will find your targets’ names and descriptors in there as well. You leave at 0800 so commit them to memory and get some rest. Dismissed.”

They left without another word, Scylla’s stride filled with stress as her brother gleefully trotted beside her. Scylla made for her room and Silas followed, only barely managing to contain his excitement until the door closed.

“Yes!” he exclaimed, punching the air. Scylla huffed out a breathless laugh, rolling her eyes at his excitement before flopping down onto her bed. “Can you believe it, Scyl? I finally got my first mission!”

She cracked one eye open and looked at him, he was positively buzzing, she was getting tired just looking at him. She heaved a heavy sigh as she sat up, “I’m proud of you Sai,” she began, “but don’t forget missions aren’t the same as training, things can get dangerous out there.”

He listened as she spoke, his excitement dulling a bit but never disappearing.

“Yeah, maybe, but whatever it is will be no match for us, right?”

“Just promise me that you’ll let me take the lead on this okay? Just stay out of trouble and let me handle it?”

His anger flared at that. Did she want him to just sit back and do nothing? He’d trained just as hard as anyone in this place and was probably twice as good. He opened his mouth to voice these thoughts, but closed it again as he registered the look of worry on her face. He sighed, biting his tongue at the scsathing remarks threatening to spill their way out as he walked over and sat beside her. “Scyl,” he sighed, resting his hand on top of hers and waiting for her to look at him. “I’m not a little kid anymore,” she opened her mouth to protest but he continued, “I was trained by the best, I got this…and besides, i’ll have you there with me and together we can handle anything, right?”

She so badly wanted to say no, to yell and scream and demand he withdraw from the mission, that he stay on base, that he stay safe, but as she looked into his eyes, her eyes, filled with such determination that she knew nothing she could say would stop him. She sighed, covering his hand with her free one, “Yeah, Sai, we got this.” she could see his excitement return full force but she wasn’t done. 

“Just-” she gripped his hand tighter in hers, bringing his attention back to her. She looked deeply into his eyes that reminded her so much of their father’s, their protector’s, making sure he absorbed every word she was about to say. “Just promise me, that you’ll stick with me, okay? If anything goes wrong, we abort the mission, I don’t care whether it’s a success or not I...I won’t lose you too.” she said, a hint of desperation creeping in as she spoke.

He placed his free hand on their pile and smiled at his sister, “I promise.”

“Good,” she nodded, “Now get out of here so I can actually see what’s in this file,” she nudged playfully, “You’re practically buzzing and it’s very distracting.”

He snorted as he rose to his feet, “Yeah, whatever,” he started toward the door, scooping up his file as he went. “I bet you’re not even gonna read that, probably just gonna nap like you always do.”

She scoffed, offended, “I do not! I take my job seriously.”

“Mmhmm, thin walls Scyl,” he said, knocking on one to emphasize his point, “I can tell when you’re asleep, you know? I swear you snore like a chainsaw-” he ducked out the door, barely dodging the pillow thrown at his head. He laughed, peeking back around the door. “Jeez, with that aim, no wonder the boss is sending me with you, you sure _you’re_ not the one who needs the extra protection?”

“Out!” she yelled, stalking toward the door.

He closed it before she got there, though she could hear him laughing on the other side. She shook her head as she returned to the bed. Sure, he may have been raised and trained by the Spree to be a soldier but at least he was still her little brother through and through. She eyed the mission folder as she settled, wondering if maybe she could actually get away with a quick nap first, maybe even a shower?

Eventually she decided against the nap, citing that it would be better for her to get all her sleep tonight before their departure in the morning, so instead she leaned over to remove her boots before grabbing the folder and settling in. It was all pretty standard stuff, watch the target, see where they go, who they talk to, enamor yourselves with them, gain their trust, see what secrets you can glean. It wasn’t until she got to the page with their accommodations that silent alarms started going off in her head.

_Why does this address sound familiar?_

Then she turned the page, and those alarm bells became full on sirens.

“ _Fuck._ ”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you guys enjoyed!  
> Comments, kudos etc chase my anxieties away and are much appreciated :)  
> And huge thanks to my awesome beta reader who makes sure I make sense.
> 
> Till next time <3


	5. Knock-knock...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Someone's moving in to Raelle's building and trust me, things will get interesting

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a little bit of angst I promise ;)

She had been quiet the whole ride here, keeping up a steady stream of curse words in her mind as she contemplated the mission ahead.

_ Of course, OF COURSE it had to be her. Of all the FBI agents in all the world…I should have backed out of this one, I should have... _ she sighed, looking over at her brother as he quirked a brow at her in silent questioning. She merely shook her head and went back to staring at the open road in front of them in quiet contemplation. She couldn't have backed out even if she had tried and she knew it, for doing so would have meant leaving her brother’s safety in the hands of someone else or even worse, he’d have been out here alone. She shook off that thought,  _ No, _ it had to be her, she had to do this. Her grip tightened on the steering wheel with each turn she made until finally the robotic voice announced that they had arrived at their destination.

Silas for his part was a little less bouncy today, he looked, for lack of a better term, like an agent on assignment, though Scylla could still see the youthful excitement bubbling beneath his calm exterior as he exited the cabin and went around to begin emptying the truck.

Scylla took a deep breath as she looked up at the building that would be their new home for the foreseeable future, steadying herself as she tried to mentally prepare for what was to come. Releasing that breath she opened the door, stepping out into the cool autumn air and heading around to help Silas with the boxes. He handed her her load and then stepped down with a box of his own as they climbed out of the truck and walked into the building.

_ Well, here goes nothing I guess. _

**_______________**

Abigail and Tally had been chatting nonstop since they picked Raelle up this morning for their mandatory ‘unit unity’ day. Raelle joined in from time to time, but for the most part she just sat and listened amusedly to her friends.

“Hey, looks like you’re getting a new neighbor, Shitbird.” 

“What?” Abigail nods her head toward her building and Raelle looked over to see a moving truck, nearly emptied as a young man carted a box into her building. She scoffed, “this building has like 10 floors, what makes you think they’d be  _ my _ neighbors?” 

Abigail shrugged, “it would be a nice change of pace, ya know, shake things up?”

“Yeah, no, I think things are plenty shaken up as is,” as they all flashed back to a late night call and missing papers, the car got quiet. 

After a few minutes of silence, Tally piped up, “Well, if it  _ is _ a new neighbor, maybe they can get this grouch off her couch more than once in a while.” 

Raelle gasped, offended. “Hey! What’s that supposed to mean?” 

Abigail laughed as she chimed in, “Oh, I think what she’s trying to say is we have no idea how you even make it out the door in the mornings with that couch plastered to your butt.” 

She rolled her eyes and opened the car door. “Okay, you know what? This is bullying...and I’m leaving now.”

“We say it with love!” Abigail yelled out her window at her retreating squad mate. 

“Uh huh, see ya tomorrow Tal!”

“Bye, Raelle!” the redhead replied as she waved.

“Hey, what about me?” Abigail asked, offended and Raelle flipped her off, earning a chuckle from the brunette. 

“Bye!” She waved as the car peeled off down the road. Raelle shook her head at their antics, as annoying as they were, they were her sisters, her family and she loved them to death...even if sometimes she wanted to kill them both. She shook her head as she got into the elevator, and waited patiently for the doors to open on her floor. The ding sounded and as Raelle stepped out into her hall, she spied an open door with boxes peeking through it. 

_ Well, would ya look at that, Bells was right,  _ she huffed, shaking her head.

_ She’s always right. _ Raelle rolled her eyes at the thought. As she approached the door, she considered looking in, maybe catching a glimpse of her new neighbor before heading around the corner to her own apartment for the night.

The door stood ajar as it was propped against a box labeled ‘Misc.’ She knocked and waited a few seconds before carefully pressing the door open further and calling out to the occupants. 

“Hello?” no one responded. “Hey I’m sorry to barge in like this. I’m one of your neighbors and I figured I’d see if you needed any help,” it was as good an excuse as any, but when it was met with no response, she figured they were probably still down in the truck or something. Shrugging her shoulders, she turned back down the hall to head to her own home when-

“Oomph!” She staggered back as she smacked into a cardboard box, sending its contents and its carrier crashing to the floor.

“Hey watch where you’re go-“

“My bad lemme help-“

They both paused, frozen in place, reaching for the contents of the now forgotten box as they realized who they had bumped into.

Raelle’s heart thudded in her chest as she stared at the girl before her. Unblinking, unmoving for fear that the mirage before her would disappear if she did. Wide azure eyes stared up at her with a mixture of shock, fear and...something else in their depths. They stayed frozen, crouched on the ground as time stretched on, the distant ding of the elevator opening to their floor the only sound as they worked to regain their faculties. 

Raelle heard the footsteps approaching and looked up just in time to see a raven haired boy rush toward them “Scyl!” He exclaimed, dropping his own box and rushing over to her. He offered  her his hand, the touch seeming to shock her back to reality as he helped her up “Hey, you ok?” He asked, his eyes worriedly tracing over her features. “Yea, Sai, I’m fine I-“

_ Silas? _

“Scyl?” she whispered, two pairs of eyes flicked over to her, pinning her with their attention.

“Who are you?” the younger Ramshorn asked.

Raelle’s mind was a clusterf**k of questions, they swirled and flowed so fast that she couldn’t hold on to a single one as she stared into those eyes.

Scylla blinked, coming back to herself, the torrent of emotions gone from her face as she looked up at the still slightly shell shocked blonde with a small smile “Hello, Raelle.”

“Scyl, you know this girl?” Silas said, looking between them but never truly taking his eyes off Raelle. Scylla tore her eyes away from her former lover as she bent down to finish collecting the spilled contents of her box, “Yeah.” he waited for more but it never came.

Sensing that was all he was going to get out of her, at least for the time being, he gathered up his own box and started toward the door “Are you gonna be okay?” he asked, standing between the two. 

“Yeah, Sai, I’ll be fine. I’ll be in in a sec.”

“Okay,” he said, giving Raelle one last once over before stepping inside the apartment.

The soft thud of the door hitting the box in its way punctuated the silence that stretched between them. They were only standing a few feet apart, but in the silence, it felt like miles. 

_ When did it get this hard? They used to talk about anything and everything and now...getting one word out felt like wading through a pool of molasses.  _

She didn’t know what to say, what question to ask first. Scylla was the first to find her voice.

“It’s been a long time Rae.”  _ Rae  _ the old nickname reverberated inside Raelle’s head like a super ball thrown against the walls of an empty room. 

“You, uh, you look good Scylla,” she said, eyeing the brunette. Scylla’s lips quirked in that way that told Raelle she was hiding a smile. An all too familiar warmth radiated through Raelle’s chest as the brunette’s eyes raked over her form, appraising her. 

“So do you.” 

The silence stretched on once more as Raelle studied her, her eyes traced her face, re-memorizing every freckle, every dip and curve that used to be her domain until she made it to her eyes. Eyes that used to be so full of life, that reminded her of the deepest parts of the ocean as the emotions within them pulled her in, beckoning her forward to drown in their depths. And drown she would have, without hesitation, however, those same eyes now seemed dulled and it made her heart ache. The more she stared, the more Raelle realized that those eyes had refused to fully meet hers this entire time. 

Scylla cleared her throat as she inched closer to the door, breaking away from the blondes intense gaze. “It was...it was nice seeing you again Raelle.” she put her hand on the door, kicking their makeshift door-stop inside as she went. 

“Wait!” Raelle called, reaching out and grabbing the brunette’s shoulder before she had time to consider whether she was crossing some sort of invisible line set between them, “Can I- can we...” she began but couldn’t finish her sentence.

_ What could she ask? What did she even have the right to ask? Would she lose the girl again if she did? _

Scylla stared at the hand on her shoulder before looking up, finally meeting the blonde’s eyes. Sensing her struggle, the older girl spoke, “I’ll see you around, yeah?” 

Raelle sighed, letting her hand fall. “Uh yeah, see you around.” Scylla nodded, turning away and stepping through the door with a click as it shut behind her.

Raelle stood there staring at the door, committing the numbers to memory _.  _ Abigail’s words came back to her as she made her way down the hall to her apartment 

_ “Might be an interesting change ya know, shake things up?”  _ Raelle huffed as her keys jingled in her door, things most certainly were about to be shaken up alright. Raelle herself hadn’t even shaken off the encounter just yet, as memories came flooding back into her mind unbidden and unrestrained. This time, however, instead of shaking them off or shying away from them, she welcomed them, like an old friend she hadn’t seen in a while, or in her case, an old  _ flame _ . 

_ Definitely about to get interesting,  _ she thought as she opted to skip her nightly beer and tv ritual and just headed straight for bed, her thoughts swirling around her head so fast it was exhausting. Drained, she changed into pajamas and flopped down face first into bed. Peeking an eye open, she checked the clock on her bedside table.

_ 9:40pm huh? Maybe I'll actually get a full night’s sleep. _

She took a deep breath, waiting to drift off into the calm nothingness of sleep. As she lay there her thoughts drifted to blue eyes and ‘what if’s’. Contemplating all the possibilities made her head hurt so she rolled over, trying to put them out of her mind for the time being and get some sleep.

She failed.

**_______________**

The next few days went by in a blur. Raelle opted to give Scylla her space, figuring if she wanted to talk she would, but aside from a few awkward encounters in the elevator, the brunette was almost a ghost. 

She was on autopilot for the most part, walking around like a zombie, never truly paying attention to anything she did as she was lost in thought. 

_ She’s back? But...how?  _

Thoughts, doubt, questions, and an unending amount of questions that have been plaguing her mind ever since she looked into oh so familiar blue eyes. Eyes that reminded her of better times, of happier times. Of afternoon walks, and picnic in secret meadows, a time when Raelle believed she could do anything, believed she could have the world if only to give it to  _ her _ . But now, even as all those hopes and dreams swirled in her mind crashing against the walls she’s fought so hard to keep steady like the waves against an unsuspecting shore, doubt swirled just below the surface, like a whirlpool threatening to pull her under.

_ Where has she been all this time? _

_ Why is she back?  _

And finally, the question she’s been avoiding the most out of them all:  _ Why didn’t she say goodbye? _ She blinked back tears as she recalled that dreaded day, the day her world came to a screeching halt, the day she lost everything she didn’t even know she had.

**********************

_ Raelle checked her phone for what seemed like the hundredth time today and still, no messages. She had fired off her usual ‘Good Morning’ text hours ago, and then a few right after it just for good measure and still...nothing. _

She could just be studying, _ she thought, after all, they were approaching midterms and Scylla was nothing if not a perfectionist, she defended her 4.0 almost as aggressively as she did Raelle... _ almost. _ Raelle smiled fondly at the memory, Scylla had all but verbally eviscerated this senior who had the misfortune of making fun of her in the 7th grade. The poor kid looked like he was going to cry when she was done with him, not that Raelle couldn’t defend herself of course, she’d been doing it for as long as she can remember, but that day the gorgeous new girl had decided to be her knight in shining plaid as she offered her hand and a smile that Raelle already knew she would do anything for. _

_ Her smile quickly faded though as she was brought back to issue at hand, where was Scylla? Even in her deepest caffeine induced study marathons she usually, at the very least, would shoot her a warning message. She checked the clock,  _ 4:40pm.  _ No, something wasn’t right, she could feel it in her gut, so she grabbed her keys, and her coat and headed over to the Ramshorn’s residence. _

_ As she drove a cold feeling that she just couldn’t shake worked its way up her spine. That cold feeling worsened as she pulled into the driveway. There were no lights in the windows and though there was plenty sunlight outside for that not to be weird, the house still felt empty, cold, almost dead. Even in their quietest moods, the Ramshorns had always projected a comforting aura everywhere they went, it was part of their charm, it was what drew people to them and as such, the aura extended to their home, made it feel welcoming to all who approached. _

_ Now though, as Raelle approached the front door, she felt no such comfort or welcome. She rang the doorbell a few times and waited but no one answered. She placed her hand on the doorknob, ignoring how uncharacteristically cold it felt and tried it when the door swung open, she paused,  _ they never left their door open, like ever.  _ She cautiously stepped through the door into the foyer. _

_ “Scyl? Mrs. Ramshorn?” she called as she made her way into the house. “I’m sorry to let myself in like this but the door was open so I figured-” she froze as she entered the living room, taking in the sight before her. It looked like a storm had made its way through the house, furniture lay haphazardly all over the place, picture frames lay broken on the floor and there were... _

Scorch marks?  _ Her blood ran cold as she inspected the blackened floor, her thoughts going far beyond her earlier fears as a grim realization scratched at her consciousness. She jumped to her feet, rushing up the stairs, taking the stairs two, maybe three at a time. “SCYLLA!” she screamed, barrelling through each door as she desperately searched for her girlfriend, hoping beyond hope that her worst fears wouldn’t bear truth. _

_ She dropped to her knees as she opened the final door,  _ her door _ and found no one. Nothing except more chaos, ripped fabrics and upturned furniture. As her head sagged in defeat, something caught her eye. She forced her body to move toward the foreign light, investigating its source. There, beneath Scylla’s nightstand, surrounded by broken glass, “No,” Raelle lamented, sinking to the floor and dropping her head in her hands that were propped against her knees. There, in her hands, lay the charm she had made for Scylla to celebrate their 6th month together. The charm that was supposed to protect her,  _ the charm that failed. 

_ Time ceased to exist, her world had come crashing down and its weight was too much for her to bear. She felt numb, her limbs ceased to respond to her mind's pleas to move, to get up and go, run away from this place that held only pain, to run until her legs gave out and she was in her arms again. But she couldn’t run, couldn’t leave when all that was left of the girl she loved was right there in front of her, she couldn’t move so she stayed, letting her sobs rack her motionless body until they wore themselves out.  _

_ She was there all night. That’s where the cops found her the next morning. _

**********************

She sniffed and rubbed at her nose with the back of her hand, taking the stray tear that had escaped her eyes with it as she let it fall back to her side.

“Hey, you okay?” Raelle all but jumped out of her skin, too consumed by her own thoughts to notice her partner’s approach. 

“Woah there shitbird, it’s just me.”

Raelle heaved a sigh, waiting for her heart rate to slow before responding. “Yeah, no, sorry Abs, didn’t see you coming.”

“Getting rusty in your old age, Collar? I mean I know I said all work and no play would make you old but damn I didn’t think you’d actually take it to heart.”

Raelle chuckled despite herself, “Oh please, I can still run circles around you any day of the week Bellweather so don’t even.”

She laughed at that, “Okay sure old timer, whatever helps you sleep at night.” she said, patting Raelle on the head and then smiling as the blonde leveled her with a glare, the action having had its intended effect. She sobered a bit, “No, but really Rae, are you okay? You’ve been kind of super distracted all day, what’s going on?”

The blonde opened her mouth to respond but then promptly closed it again, not even knowing where to start. How was she supposed to explain that her girlfriend,  _ ex-girlfriend _ , she mentally corrected, came back from the dead and is now living just a few doors down from her and it’s bringing up all these feelings that she has no idea how to deal with? She felt a headache forming just at the thought. Instead, she sighed and gave her as much of the truth as she could handle telling for the moment. “It’s nothing Bells, just...just got a lot on my mind is all,” seeing the look of concern on the other girl’s face, she continued, “I’ll be fine, I promise, okay?”

The Bellweather studied her face for a few more seconds, not at all convinced that she would in fact be ‘fine’ then sighed, having found nothing. “Okay, okay, if you say so. But maybe you should go home, yeah? Get some rest?”

Raelle smirked, “What? Trying to get rid of me already? And here I thought we were just starting to get along.” she teased. 

Abigail rolled her eyes at that. “First of all, not on your life.” she began, “and second? I just don’t want you zoning out on the gun range or something and getting someone hurt. Important people visit that range all the time.” 

Raelle snorted. “Yeah? Like who?”

“Like me, shitbird, now go!” she said, pushing Raelle toward the locker room as she guffawed at the brunette's response.

**_______________**

The drive home had done little to calm Raelle’s racing mind. If anything, the closer she got to her building, the louder her thoughts screamed at her for answers. It didn’t help at all that she had literally made a career out of solving mysteries, her inner detective only bolstered her heart’s yearning for answers and to make their way to the one person who could provide them.

_But what if knowing hurts even more?_ She sighed at that, because _what if?_ Right now she could give herself any explanation she wanted and stick with it as the truth and it would settle her mind...wouldn’t it? Even as she thought about it she knew that wasn’t true. Her mind would not truly rest, not now, without getting the _whole_ truth. She huffed, but what if the whole truth is worse than any lie?

_ Then at least I’d know. _

She tried to shake the thoughts from her head as she approached her door, blanching at the numbers on the wall. It seemed her feet had made the decision for her as they had unconsciously brought her to Scylla’s door. She raised her hand to knock, indecision suspending it in the air as self preservation warred with her need for the truth, and if not that then surely closure.

_ I could leave,  _ she reasoned,  _ I could turn around, head back to my own apartment and stay there, I don’t  _ have _ to do this. _

She dropped her fist, heaving a heavy sigh. That was when the door opened, revealing a shocked Scylla.

“R-Raelle, hi,” the brunette said, recovering, “are you okay?”

Raelle took a deep breath, “Yeah, uhm, can we talk?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay well things are about to get interesting 👀.
> 
> Thank you guys for reading, and to my awesome beta for making sure I’m making sense :)
> 
> Comments, kudos, etc are always appreciated!
> 
> See you guys next time!!


	6. Falling Slowly

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Our bbs have a lil talk, a lil stroll down memory lane.

Scylla stood frozen in the entryway as she peered up at her unexpected visitor. “R-Raelle,” she stammered out, “are you okay?” She had been purposefully avoiding Raelle all week trying to figure out what to say to the blonde, biding her time until she could find the words, but now, her time was up. She tried to keep the panic off her face, her thoughts reeling as they tried to take shape and bring forth the words that would placate her former lover, that would excuse her absence over the past few years...that would excuse her betrayal. That last one made Scylla wince, how could she justify herself to the woman she was about to betray? To the woman who had only ever looked at her with honesty and love in her eyes? To the woman who-

“Scyl?”

Scylla blinked, coming out of herself as she peered up at Raelle still standing awkwardly in the doorway.

“Yeah, um, I was just about to go for a walk actually.”

“Oh,” Raelle looked down, disappointment coating her features as she stared awkwardly at her feet. Scylla knew this gesture well and it made her smile despite herself. She had forgotten how clueless Raelle could be sometimes, 

_And how cute she looked when she was-_

“Rae?” Scylla whispered, touching the blonde’s arm. Raelle’s head snapped up at the familiar nickname and sudden contact, “I meant,” Scylla continued, stepping over the threshold and inadvertently lessening the space between them, “would you want to join me on my walk?”

A slow smile spread across the blonde’s face at the invitation and Scylla pretended that her heart didn’t skip a beat when it did. 

“Yeah, sure,” she said, “lead the way,” she finished, giving the older girl a half bow as she passed.

Scylla giggled into her hand at the theatrics, and for the first time in over ten years, she felt lighter, like a weight had been lifted off her shoulders in the presence of her former lover.

**_______________**

That weight slowly came back as the two walked down the grassy paths of a nearby running trail. An awkward silence had settled between them as neither knew what to say or where to even start.

Raelle peeked at Scylla through the corner of her eye when she thought the brunette wasn’t watching, still in awe of all the things that were still so familiar about her but at the same time, taking note of the things that weren’t, like how Scylla’s eyes seemed to subtly dart back and forth as they walked, almost as if she was waiting for an impending attack. Raelle understood that instinct well as it had been drilled into her for years. 

_‘Always be prepared.’ That’s what Anacostia had always said during our days at basic. It had made sense then because it was true, as agents we frequently make very dangerous enemies but,_ she paused, looking over at the brunette again, _I can’t imagine Scylla would be in the same position...right?_

She had been so lost in her musings that she failed to notice that a pair of ocean blue eyes were now watching her with curiosity.

Scylla hadn’t realized just how much she would be affected by the blonde’s presence before taking on this mission, but even after all these years, her body still reacted to her presence. She found herself missing days like these. Raelle would pick her up in her car and they would go off on an adventure of some kind, always to a place she had stumbled upon on one of her jaunts through the woods.

_She really did have a knack for finding the most beautiful places,_ Scylla smiled as the memory of one place in particular flitted across her mind. 

“So,” Raelle began, breaking the awkward silence, “how’s the city been treating you so far?”

“It has its moments.” Raelle nodded at that, falling back into silence.

They walked for a few more minutes before the silence finally became too much for her. She stopped abruptly beneath a towering tree, its canopy shielding them from the sun’s afternoon rays and making the day just a bit colder. Scylla skidded to a halt a few inches away as she watched Raelle grope for the right words.

The emotions on her face seemed to calm a bit as she chose her question, the only prominent one left being anxiety? No, Scylla recognized the furrow in her brow and the contemplative set to her jaw, Raelle was afraid.

_But of what?_

Scylla opened her mouth to speak but looked over and found that she was alone as her blonde companion had trotted toward a cart in the distance, forcing Scylla to quicken her pace to catch up. She could hear Raelle finishing up her order as she approached and before she could ask, the blonde turned on her with a sly smile on her face.

Scylla knew she had a quizzical look on her face but her confusion seemed to only increase Raelle’s delight. Eventually, the man stood from behind the cart and handed Raelle two steaming cups, one of which she handed over to Scylla, looking at her expectantly.

She sighed as she took a hesitant sip of the mystery beverage, her face lighting up with surprise as she took another sip, burning her tongue and sending Raelle into a fit of laughter in the process.

“I’m glad my pain amuses you,” she admonished, trying to sound annoyed, but failing.

Raelle tried to choke back her laughter as she nursed her own drink, “Hey, no one told you to _inhale_ burning hot coffee,” she laughed, “that was completely on you.”

“And who was it who failed to tell me that the drink they handed me would give me third-degree burns?” she challenged.

“Uh uh, no way, you sipped it first, you knew what you were getting into. I am completely innocent, your honor,” Raelle defended, raising her hands as if in surrender.Her steps slowed as their laughter subsided. “Hey, uh, I have something for you,” Scylla turned at her change in tone, watching as Raelle fished something out of her pocket. Her features quickly morphed from confusion to recognition as she carefully accepted the trinket.

Her breath came out in a huff as she turned the object over in her hands, carefully tracing its intricate designs as a memory rose from the depths of her mind.

_Raelle had been cagey all day about where they were going. Scylla’s patience was not the best but she indulged her girlfriend if only to keep the absolute glee she could hear in her voice as they navigated their surroundings._

_“Okay, okay, can I take this thing off now?” she asked, narrowly avoiding tripping as she stumbled along with Raelle’s direction._

_“Patience, Scyl, you will be rewarded, I promise.”_

_Scylla quirked a brow, not that it could be seen behind the blindfold, but it’s the thought that counts. “Oh? And uh,” she slowed her pace, “what if I wanted my ‘reward’ right now?”_ _She heard a low chuckle from behind her and had to hold back a shudder as soft lips ghosted over her pulse point, making their way up her neck and resting at the curve of her ear._

_“Well, in that case, I would say,” Raelle paused, playfully nipping her ear, “that you should have patience.”_

_She laughed as the older girl groaned and pushed at her shoulder, missing due to her lack of sight._

_“I’m sorry, was- was that meant for me?” Raelle teased._

_“Just take me to wherever it is we’re going,” she made a note to roll her eyes at the blonde once the action could be seen again._

_They walked maybe twenty more feet before she was pulled to a stop and the blindfold was removed. Scylla looked around at the setup. It seemed Raelle had set up an impromptu movie night for them complete with popcorn, a blanket fort and-_

_Her eyes zeroed in on a small box sitting in the middle of everything. She walked over and picked it up, turning it over in her hands before looking back at Raelle, a question in her eyes._

_Raelle, who was standing back and allowing Scylla to take in her surroundings, made her approach. She crouched down beside the brunette, taking the box from her hands and opening it, offering its contents to her girlfriend._

_Scylla retrieved the trinket and was immediately in awe of the intricacy of its design. “You made this?”_

_Raelle blushed a little. “Well, yeah. It’s supposed to be a protection charm. I’m not a hundred percent certain about how this stuff works but, apparently it’s supposed to keep you safe and-” her ramble was quickly cut off as Scylla’s lips crashed into hers._

_“I love it”, she smiled, still inspecting the tiny charm._

_“Good, I’m glad,” Raelle hummed, smiling as they separated. “I just wanna make sure you’re safe, Scyl, even if I’m not there to protect you in person.” Her voice was taking on a more serious tone and Scylla looked up, her gaze met with Raelle’s unwavering stare. “I love you so much Scylla Ramshorn-”_

“Where did you find this?” Scylla said, shaking off the memory.

Raelle looked down, “I uh, found it at your house after...well, just after.”

Scylla looked up in shock.

_She went to the house?_ Before Scylla could give any real thought to that realization Raelle spoke again.

“Hey,” Raelle began, planting her feet before meeting Scylla’s azure gaze. “Listen Scyl, I don’t even care about why you left, okay? Or even where the hell you’ve been all this time? The only thing I can’t figure out is, why you didn’t tell me I mean, I thought- I don’t know.” she sighed, looking down at her feet again.

Scylla’s heart ached for her. She had to keep reminding herself of all the reasons she shouldn’t, _couldn’t_ give Raelle the answers she wanted. That didn’t change the fact that her instincts were screaming at her to do _something_ , to reach forward and take her hand, pulling her into an embrace that would assure her that everything was fine, that _they_ were fine but she couldn’t. She remained silent, watching, and waiting.

Raelle cleared her throat, visibly trying to shake off the emotions that were bubbling to the surface “I guess it doesn’t matter now, right?” she smiled, “It’s all in the past.” 

Her face took on a more serious look which had Scylla worried. She took a step forward, pausing when Raelle looked up at her and spoke again.

“What matters now is that you’re here now, with...with me,” a sad chuckle escaped her lips as she spoke, “I mean of all the cities, Scyl, right?”

“Raelle-”

“Look, Scyl, I know it’s been a long time and we’re probably, maybe definitely, different people now but,” she moved closer, placing her hands on either side of Scylla’s face, locking their gazes, “I can’t help but think that we’ve been given a second chance, ya know?”

Scylla was frozen in place, unable to move or speak as Raelle kept getting closer and closer, each step she took a sledgehammer to the walls the brunette had put up over the years. She could feel them crumbling into dust as the blonde stared into her eyes, into her _soul_. 

"Tell me I'm wrong, Scyl..." Scylla closed her eyes, fighting the emotions bubbling to the surface at the pain and fear in Raelle's voice. Her own stuck behind the huge boulder in her throat. "Tell me, you don't want this," she caressed Scylla’s cheek as she spoke, the familiar motion bringing tears to the brunette’s eyes, "that you didn’t _miss_ this," 

She could see the conflict and indecision in the brunette's eyes as her chin quivered beneath her touch. Scylla's hands moved to Raelle's wrists, gripping them hard as if they were her only anchors without which she would float away, forgetting all talks of duty and of a mission just for one moment with the girl who, even after all these years, still held her heart. She squeezed her eyes shut, willing her thoughts to make sense, to calm and allow her the strength to do what needed to be done. 

She could feel Raelle inching closer, her warm breath caressing her face, her lips. How easy would it be to give in, just for one night? To have one night where there was no mission, no choosing sides, to have one night where they were just Raelle and Scylla, one more night where they could forget all the pain and hurt in their pasts and just be.

She gasped as soft lips melded to hers, her worries disappearing as their lips brushed together. Raelle kissed her like it was their first kiss ever _or their last._ It burned with all the emotion and intensity that the blonde had been holding at bay for years now, and Scylla would have gladly let the flames between them consume her- 

Her eyes snapped open, the intensity of those thoughts giving her a moment of clarity through the haze of Raelle. She pulled back, fighting her body’s urge to forget all the reasons she _shouldn’t_ be doing this and lean in, letting the inferno consume every part of her. She put her hands on the blonde's chest in an attempt to maintain the distance between them as she collected herself. Finally, she looked up, meeting the earnest haze of the woman that had been her safe haven for so long, she took a shuddering breath. "Raelle, I...I can't I-" 

Her words were cut off as the blonde leaned up and away, putting even more distance between them. Scylla stifled a whimper at the loss of contact, not daring to meet Raelle’s eyes.

The blonde swiped her nose with her finger, a clear sign she was trying to control her own emotions as she spoke. "I uh, I'm sorry, I don't know what I was thinking." the tremulous tone of her voice betraying her schooled exterior.

"No, Rae, I-" Scylla tried to reach out to her, but her arms stayed rooted at her sides, what right did she have to her anymore? 

"It's, uh, it's okay," she said backing away. 

"Rae," Scylla's voice trembled with emotion as she watched Raelle's retreat.

"We should uh, we should get back," she stated, already backing toward the direction from which they had come.

The walk back was a silent one, both girls too consumed with their own thoughts to make much conversation. Raelle slowed as they approached Scylla’s door, the brunette fumbling for the keys before finding the correct ones and unlocking the door. She turned before stepping past the threshold, wanting to say something that would free Raelle from the thoughts she tried to hide but knowing there was nothing that could be said. She had messed up, it wasn’t supposed to be like this, she knew better than to bring emotions into a mission but, looking up at the woman before her, all fire and emotion even after her rejection, how could she not.

She sighed, “Raelle.”

“No, Scyl.” Raelle interrupted, giving her a small smile.“You don’t have to explain yourself to me okay? I was out of line, and I’m sorry.”

Scylla wanted so badly to tell her that she had nothing to be sorry for, to pull her in and finish what they had started in the park, but she held her ground and her tongue, unable to make a promise to Raelle that she would most likely have to break later.

“I’ll, uh, I’ll see you around okay?” 

Scylla looked up, trying to hide her own sadness “Yeah, okay. See you around.”

And with that she left, heading to her own apartment and leaving Scylla standing in her doorway.

Scylla sank to the floor as the door closed, her emotions running through her so quickly and unhindered that it made her want to scream, to cry, to hit something so hard that they had no choice but to subside, but she could do none of that, so she just let the tears she had been holding back fall silently down her cheeks. How easily she would have given up everything, her mission, her thoughts of justice for her parents, and all for blonde locks and a roguish grin. She would have given it all for the girl that still held so much of her heart and soul in her hands. 

_Yeah, easy mission indeed,_ she thought wryly to herself. This was going to be anything but easy. And what about after? Could she really do it again? Could she pack up and leave Raelle without so much as a word?

The answer came as soon as she had the thought. Yes, if it meant she'd stay safe, Scylla would endure whatever distance, whatever pain it took as long as the blonde would be okay. She sighed, pulling herself up off the floor and heading to her room for the night. She had no idea how she was going to do this, but she knew she had to. She put all other thoughts out of her mind as she turned out her lights, and lay her head on her pillow. All other thoughts except one that plastered itself across her eyelids as they closed, blue eyes, deep and filled with emotion never left her consciousness. 

_This is going to be a long mission,_ she thought _,_ sighing and waiting for sleep to take her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well...that happened😬  
> But at least they've talked out some of their feelings right?  
> Anywho, thank you for sticking with me this far, and for continuing to read and leave comments and kudos, it really does warm my heart <3!  
> I hope you're enjoying it!  
> As always HUGE thanks to my beta for making sure I continue to make sense.
> 
> I'll see you guys next time!!


	7. Between a rock and...well...another Rock

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Scylla and Raelle both deal with the result of their stroll in their own ways.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys we're back! Took a bit of a mental health break, as one does, but we're back and (hopefully) better than ever!  
> Enjoy!!

_ “You know what I love about this place?” _

_ “The fact that if you murder me no one will hear my screams?” _

_ Raelle scoffed. “Cute.” _

_ “I aim to please.” Raelle chuckled and shook her head at that. Scylla would do anything to keep seeing her smiling like this, so easy and carefree. She cleared her throat, “Okay but seriously though, why?”  _

_ “Because it’s quiet. No one knows about it except for us, you know? It’s like we’re in our own little world. I feel like anything is possible here,” a shy smile tugged at her lips as she turned to face the brunette, “it’s the same way I feel with you.” _

_ Scylla huffed and rolled her eyes, “Always the charmer, aren’t you?” _

_ “I have my moments.” _

_ Scylla looked up into pools of blue clearer than the sky itself, she felt like she was floating, no, not floating, flying as Raelle pinned her with a gaze that had no right to be as soft as it was. _

_ “Yeah, I guess you do.” _

_ Raelle’s smile widened as she lifted her hands, reaching for the brunette’s face, caressing her cheek with her thumb as Scylla leaned into the touch, every part of her body calming in a way that only happened with the girl in front of her, with the girl she- _

_ “ _ Wake up, Scyl. _ ” _

_ “What?” it seemed as if Raelle blurred for a moment as she tried to wrap her mind around the strange statement.  _

_ “ _ Wake up! _ ” panic set in as she realized what was about to happen, a little too late as the hand on her cheek dissolved and the voice calling for her got louder and deeper and  _ familiar.

“Scyl? Scylla? Come on, the boss is gonna want a report in like five seconds and I am not gonna be the one to tell him his ‘star’ pupil missed her check-in for some extra  _ beauty sleep _ , now come on!”

“Go away Sai,” Scylla groaned, “We still have plenty of time to- HEY!”.

The younger Ramshorn cackled as he danced out of his sister’s grasp and bounded out the door. “Ten minutes, sis.”

Scylla grumbled something about being an only child before she sighed and headed for the bathroom so she could get ready for the day.

One quick shower and a huge mug of coffee later and she found herself seated on the couch in their living room, Silas by her side as they stared at a black screen, awaiting communication. They didn’t have to wait long, a few minutes later the laptop whirred and the screen flickered to life, the stern face of their boss appearing in place of the blackness.

**_Agents Ramshorn, status report._ **

Scylla cleared her throat before she began, slipping into her ‘all business’ persona with ease. “We have officially settled into the building and I have made contact with the target.”

**_Excellent. I expect she will be able to get us the information we need?_ **

Scylla hid a flinch at that, “Undetermined sir, we- our relationship is not yet at the point where I can glean this information-”

**_What do you mean_ ** **undetermined?** His voice took on a menacing undertone that sent chills up her spine.

**_Did you or did you not make contact with the target Agent Ramshorn?_ **

Scylla gulped, biting back the fear trickling through her veins at his change in tone as she grappled for an answer. “Yes sir, however getting close was a bit more...difficult than expected and-”

**_And nothing, agent! You_ ** **will** **_get close to your target and you_ ** **will** **_get us the information we need._ **

“Yes sir,” she conceded.

**_Good. I expect a more robust report at your next debriefing and remember, Scylla...Failure is not an option._ **

He leveled the older Ramshorn with a significant look, making sure the gravity of his words were felt before the screen went black.

She released a breath she didn’t know she was holding, her shoulders going slack as she slumped back into the sofa, eyes closing as she contemplated the task ahead.

“Hey, sis?”

“Mmm?”

“Why  _ haven’t _ you been around Collar lately?” Scylla’s jaw tightened “I mean, when you two bumped into each other that first day, she was clearly into you. Usually you’d have had her wrapped around your finger by now and we’d be out of here but...if anything, it seems like you’re avoiding her? I know you’re not but it’s just...it’s weird, right?”

She kept her eyes closed, mind churning as she recalled exactly why she had been avoiding the blonde for days now, but also exactly why she couldn’t tell Silas. 

_ He wouldn’t understand anyways. This is my burden and I can’t ask him to carry it,  _ she reasoned, but there was another voice in her head, quiet but clear, that warned differently.

_ Is lying to him any better? _

She sighed as she opened her eyes and looked up at the younger Ramshorn. “You’re right Sai, it is different. Rae-  _ Collar’s _ not like my other marks.”  _ Not a complete lie at least, _ she thought, smirking a little at how close to the truth that actually was. “Don’t worry so much, okay?” she said, patting him on the shoulder and she stood and headed for the kitchen, “we’ll have her soon enough, but for now...Pancakes?” 

All traces of seriousness melted from the young man’s face at the suggestion, replaced with a youthful glow his sister hoped would never go away.

“Chocolate?” he asked, hopeful.

“Is there any other kind?” 

  
  


**_______________**

Going back to normal life after their talk had been interesting, to say the least. She thought it would have given her at least  _ some _ of the answers she wanted but, if anything, she only ended up with more questions. Her Scylla was there, she’d seen it, seen the longing in her eyes that mirrored her own, felt it in the way their lips met, slotting into place like nothing had changed, like they hadn’t been apart for a decade. But then, everything changed, she felt the shift as the brunette pulled back, pushing her away.

The weirdest thing about it? She could have sworn she saw a hint of...something in her eyes. Fear, maybe? She hadn’t had enough time to figure it out because as quickly as it had come, it disappeared. It’s not like she had the time to fully ponder this ever-growing list of questions anyway, not if the Spree had anything to say about it. Ever since her unit had captured one of their agents, the rest had become increasingly slippery, almost like ghosts. By the time they would get intel on a location and gather a strike team, it would already be empty, cleared of any and everything even remotely resembling evidence. It was frustrating.

Between Scylla and all these failed ops, it was safe to say she had A LOT of steam to blow off, and luckily for her, she had no shortage of ways to do so. She had taken to throwing herself into her work, more dedicated than ever. When she sparred she held nothing back, throwing fists and elbows with as much fury as she could muster. Her already impeccable aim got sharper, her legs faster, it had gotten to the point where almost no one except for her own unit dared challenge agent Collar on the mat. This change would have been commendable if it wasn’t so concerning.

Her unit had been dancing around the subject, letting her work out whatever was bothering her in her own way but still remaining close in the event she decided to talk about it. Eventually, for one unit mate in particular, it all became too much. 

"So, what's with the whole RoboCop act?" Tally asked.

"I don't know what you mean," she responded easily, not looking up from the bag she was packing. Their day had just ended and Raelle had spent the majority of it training, hoping that the exhaustion and the ache in her muscles would give her mind something else to fixate on and put her to sleep in no time...if only she could avoid the interrogation she could feel coming her way.

Tally sat beside her, carefully placing a hand on her shoulder, waiting for her to look up and giving her a nudge when she didn't.

"Come on Rae, you've been going at it non-stop for weeks now, even Abigail is worried, and that's saying something!"

The idea of Abigail being concerned over her training regimen made her laugh. The Bellweather has been on her back about it for as long as she can remember.

Tally smiled. " _ There _ we go. Haven't seen that in a while.” 

Raelle snorted and shook her head. “Yeah, yeah.”

“Hey,” Tally nudged her side, “I know we’ve had a couple of setbacks these last few ops, but we haven’t lost yet,” she paused, letting Raelle absorb her words. “You know you can talk to us, right? We’re your family, Rae, we’ll be there for you no matter what it is.” she nodded. 

Tally exhaled, searching for something to lighten the mood, “Hey, how about we have a unit movie night? Just like the old days? Me and Abs will come over, we’ll order a pizza...”

Raelle had to admit it did sound nice, plus she hadn’t had a real night out  _ or in _ with her unit mates in a long while. She missed them. That did not mean that she was going to give in this easily though, she still had a reputation to uphold, after all.

“I dunno, Tal.”

Tally stared her down, “I’ll even let you and Abigail pick the movie,” she coaxed, but Raelle didn’t budge. Tally tried again, sighing in faux resignation, “Come on, I'd even be willing to let it be horror, Rae, you know how much I hate those!”

Raelle hid a smile, still biding her time, waiting to see just how far Tally would take this.

“ _ Please?”  _ she said, pulling out her patented puppy dog eyes, that was so unfair, how was she supposed to say no now? “Come on Rae, I'll even bring something from Abi’s secret stash! You know she hides some of her best stuff there.”

The blonde smiled, cheering almost immediately as she snagged her bag from its place beneath her and stood, “Well why didn’t you say so Tal? I’m in.”

Tally chuckled at her borderline alcoholic friend as she gathered her own things and began following Raelle out the door. 

Raelle paused at the threshold, forcing Tally to come to a screeching halt behind her, curiosity in her eyes as the smaller girl looked over her shoulder.

“Oh, and we’re still watching that horror movie.”

“Wha-”

“Hope you like evil clowns, Tal.” Raelle said, wiggling her eyebrows sinisterly. Tally blanched and the blonde could be heard cackling all the way to her car.

_ She’s lucky I love her, _ Tally thought, rolling her eyes and following her out.

**_______________**

It had been nearly two weeks to the day since her boss had all but demanded she push her way into Raelle’s life, which meant it had also been a week since her brother had taken it upon himself to become her own personal mission reminder. She chuckled to herself, his commitment to the cause would be pride inducing...if it wasn’t so terrifying. The plan had always been to stick with the Spree until she took care of her parents’ killers, then she’d take Sai and they’d both disappear, go back to some semblance of a normal life, but what she didn’t factor in was how much her little brother would actually take to the Spree. They technically raised him after all. Scylla sighed, the weight of their last argument pressing down on her as she looked out over the city.

_ “Scyl, we need a plan.” _

_ “A plan for what?” she asked, feigning ignorance; the look she received in turn told her he wasn’t buying it. _

_ “A plan to get you into Collar’s life? Remember her? Our target? The whole reason we’re out here in the first place? The mission we’re supposed to be completing?” _

_ “Ah right, that plan, hmm...” she hummed, absentmindedly popping another chip into her mouth, stalling. _

_ Silas rolled his eyes and snatched the bag from her hands “Wha- Hey!” _

_ “This is serious, Scyl, the boss said-” _

_ “ _ Failure is not an option, _ ” she mimicked, snatching her chips back. “yeah, I was there, remember?” _

_ “Do you? He said she and her team could have the information we’ve been waiting for to take down the FBI…mom and dad’s killers, Scyl”. she paused mid-chew as he asked, “don’t you care?” _

_ Her anger flared at the insinuation and she had to remind herself that, objectively, he had every right to be asking questions. Doesn’t mean the barbs didn’t still hurt though. _

_ “Of course I care, Sai, how could you even ask that?” she said, a drop of that hurt seeping into her voice. _

_ He must have noticed because his next words were softer, less charged. “Then let’s get this done,” he pleaded, moving forward and taking a seat beside her, “You may be his star recruit but you know how the boss feels about failures, Scylla, what are you waiting for?” _

_ She stared at the bag of chips in her lap, refusing to meet his eyes for fear he’d glean a truth she was not yet ready to share.  _

_ “Nothing,” she said, lacing some nonchalance into her words as she spoke, “I was just waiting for her to miss me a little,” she continued, smirk in place. ”absence makes the heart grow fonder, right?” _

_ He chuckled at that. “Of course, I forgot who I was talking to, Scylla ‘I’ve never met a girl I couldn’t charm’ Ramshorn, my apologies, ma’am.” _

_ “And don’t you forget it”. she said, poking his side and eliciting a laugh from the younger Ramshorn. “You may be right though,” she continued, “maybe I have extended this ‘hiatus’ a little long.”  _

_ “So you’ll start taking this seriously? Please?”  _

_ “Yeah, okay.” _

That was a week ago. She had bumped into Raelle once on her way out of the building since then. They had gotten stuck in the elevator for an hour as it hovered between floors. The tension was so thick you could cut it with a knife and when it was over Raelle all but dove through the open doors and was gone before Scylla could even form a syllable.

She groaned as she leaned back onto her arms. Why was this so difficult? She dated the girl for crying out loud, she’d gleaned information from more targets than she could count, male  _ and _ female without even really trying, so why was Raelle so difficult?

_ You know why. _

That annoying voice in her head was right. She knew exactly why the blonde was different, more difficult, she knew, but that didn’t change the fact that she just  _ couldn’t _ . That’s why she had taken to seeking comfort in her new favorite hiding spot. A small garden on the roof of their building that seemed to be forgotten, or more likely ignored, by the rest of the residents. Scylla didn’t mind the solitude, in fact, she welcomed it, it was a welcomed reprieve from all the problems that seemed to plague her mind elsewhere, here, in her little makeshift meadow where the afternoon sun’s glow warmed her skin and chased away her worries, she could almost relax.

_ Almost. _


	8. Oasis

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A little early but what the hay right?   
> No warnings, no summary. Hope you enjoy!

Raelle sighed as she stepped through the door of her apartment, the exhaustion of the past week finally catching up to her. Okay maybe _ Tally was right, _ she thought as every step she took pointed out every new bruise and ache in her body. She had been pushing herself beyond her limits for weeks now, figuring that the more she focused on her body, the less time her mind would have to drift to stark blue eyes and soft lips that beckoned her down the hall. Lips she  _ had kissed _ and that had kissed her back...before their retreat that is.

She couldn’t wrap her mind around it. Scylla had kissed her back and fervently so. She could feel  _ her Scylla _ in the kiss, felt the emotions as their lips pressed together, emotions that had burned deep within her for years now, so why had the brunette rejected her?

She growled against the thoughts, frustration morphing into agitation and filling her with nervous energy even as tired as she was. She paced back and forth in her living room, biding her time, picking up and replacing various objects as she willed her mind to quiet. A few more laps and she finally came to a stop in front of her couch, eyeing its warm and inviting surface, trying to convince herself to sit down, letting its plush cushions lull her racing mind with the help of a nice cold beer. 

She shook her head and sighed in resignation. Her usual beer and tv routine wasn’t going to cut it today, she needed to move, to be outside, the walls of her apartment were making her feel claustrophobic which only increased her agitation. 

Having made her choice, Raelle walked over to her fridge, yanking the door open and pulling out a six-pack (or two) quickly depositing them in a cooler, closing the icebox, and heading for the door.

_ Maybe the stairs will burn some of this energy _ she thought, and so she sidestepped the elevator and started up the stairs, hoping to find comfort in the rays of the afternoon sun.

**_______________**

Scylla’s mind had begun drifting as she sat atop her concrete perch. It drifted through timelines both existent and non-existent, flitted across fantasies and promises she could never hope to keep, yearning for a life she could never have, a life stolen from her years ago.

The creaking of the door behind her alerted her to the fact that she was no longer alone in her little oasis. The hairs standing on end on the back of her neck told her exactly who the intruder was without her even having to look.

“Oh, my bad um...I didn’t know anyone else was up here I uh...I can go-”

"No," Scylla said, a sad smile on her face, "no, it's okay. Stay, please."

Raelle nodded but didn’t approach the other girl, instead taking a seat on one of the chairs left there for or by one of the other residents. They sat in silence for a while, each consumed in their own thoughts. It was Scylla who broke it.

“It’s beautiful, you know.”

Raelle looked up at the brunette, “What is?” she asked, unable to see her face or her intent due to her position behind her.

“The sunset. I can’t remember the last time I actually saw one,” she scoffed, “as sad as that sounds.”

“Life just gets away from you sometimes I guess,” Raelle began, taking a timid step closer to the edge, “sometimes you forget to stop and smell the roses, appreciate the little things.”

Scylla huffed, “you may be right about that”.

Raelle heard an undertone in Scylla’s voice that she couldn’t place but it ate at her and it wasn’t until she finally closed the distance between her and the roof's edge, still giving the brunette a respectable amount of space that she recognized what it was. There, illuminated by the fading glow of the afternoon sun, glistening on her marble cheeks. Scylla was crying. It took everything in her to keep her hands to herself, to respect the distance the older girl had put between them, but oh how she wanted to reach out. 

Every bone in her body ached to hold her former lover in her arms and make everything okay, make  _ her _ okay...but she couldn’t, not without risking the loss of whatever this tiny moment of calm was, so she said nothing. Taking a chance, she reached over and pulled one of the bottles from her case, holding it out to her, waiting. Scylla looked up at the gesture, seeming to weigh it in her head for a moment before reaching out and accepting it; using the corner of her concrete perch to open it, before taking a sip. 

A small astonished gasp escaped Raelle’s lips before she caught herself. Following Scylla’s lead, she reached down once more, taking a beer for herself and opening it with her bottle opener. She could almost swear she saw Scylla’s lips twitch toward a smile as she produced the small object, almost. She took a swig of the cool liquid, letting it run through her whole body, calming her nerves a little before resting it on the concrete before her, grasping it with both hands, as she watched the sunset.

They sat in silence. Neither knowing how, or if they should break it for fear that the peace settling around them would evaporate with a single misplaced breath. But they both had questions burning inside them, it was only a matter of time before one of them broke, emboldened either by the sense of security found in their little oasis, or by the pull of the liquid confidence they had been consuming for who knows how long now.

“Can I ask you something?” Scylla said, breaking the silence. 

“Sure,” Raelle answered, not taking her eyes off the horizon, watching as the bright oranges and reds of the sun gave way to the calmer blues of dusk.

Scylla sat, turning the words over in her head until they could make their way out into the world. Raelle waited, patiently watching as Scylla turned the words over in her head.

“Why...” Scylla took a breath, grappling for her words, she turned, facing the blonde this time, having decided this conversation was better had face-to-face. “Why’d you keep my charm?”

Raelle’s eyes widened in astonishment at the question. She had never really thought about it, in fact, the thought of  _ not _ keeping it had never even crossed her mind once in the last decade.

“I mean, you didn’t have to, I was...gone...you could have tossed it, you know? Or just left it where you found it, but you didn’t. You kept it, and-”

“It never even crossed my mind.” she interrupted.

“What?” Raelle turned on her, the sky meeting the ocean under the moonlight as she spoke. 

“It never crossed my mind,” she repeated. “I mean, when I went to the house there was just so much damage,” Raelle’s eyes took on a haunted look as she recalled the memory. “Everything was broken, and then the scorch marks...” she shuddered at the image. “I dunno,” she finished, seeming to have shaken the image from her mind “I guess...I guess it gave me hope.”

“Hope?”

Raelle glanced down, a small, slightly embarrassed smile on her lips.

“Yeah. I guess I just hoped that somehow you were okay. That it had done its job and kept you safe...that maybe you’d come back.”

“Raelle.”

The blonde raised her hands, effectively cutting off Scylla’s speech. “Yeah, you didn’t come back for me, I know.”

Scylla cringed at that,  _ if only you knew. _ If only Raelle knew that that was the exact reason why she had come back. Scylla had never wanted to be done with a mission more in her life. Every part of her wanted to tell Raelle exactly why she was here and accept whatever response the blonde deemed fit.

_ But do you, though?  _ an annoying voice in her head asked.

_ No. _ And it was the truth. As much as Scylla hated to admit it, hated that she had this weakness, she knew it. She couldn’t bear the way Raelle would look at her if she knew the truth. The hurt, the betrayal, the  _ hatred _ that would replace the love in her eyes; even now as she tried to hide it in an attempt to respect the space that Scylla had placed between them, that  _ time _ had placed between them. The life she had chosen all those years ago had never felt as heavy as it did now, on this rooftop, under the gaze of those eyes.

“I guess it sort of worked though, didn’t it?” Raelle continued, oblivious to the storm raging within Scylla. “I mean, I didn’t think I’d ever see you again, Scyl, it had almost started to sink in that maybe you actually were-”  _ dead,  _ but she couldn’t bring herself to say the words. She cleared her throat. “and then there you were. In my apartment building, no less, and I honestly thought it must be some sort of miracle...or maybe sparring with the Bellweather finally got to me.” Raelle laughed. “I mean i'm not usually one to believe in fate but-”

“I don't believe in fate Raelle,” Scylla tried weakly, the whirlpool of emotions around them threatening to drown her in their depths if she wasn’t careful. She needed to stop this.

“Do you believe in me?” Raelle countered.

“Rae-”

“Look, Scyl, I know what you're gonna say and I-”

“No, you don't!” she spat, a little more aggressively than intended. “You don't, Raelle. You don't know me anymore, I'm not the girl you fell in love with, and don't say you don't care about that because I can see it in your eyes when you look at me. I can see that you're waiting for her to come back and I don't think she ever will.”

“Scylla, listen to me, I don't care who you are now, all I have thought about for the past 12 years of my life is you. How I wasn't there for you when you needed me most. I didn't protect you, I wasn't there to tell you everything was gonna be okay.” her voice broke at the end, stumbling it's way past the lump in her throat. She cleared her throat before continuing, “I know you don't wanna be with me and that’s perfectly okay, I...I know you don't love me anymore at...at least not the way you used to but please just...don't push me away, Scyl. I just got you back and I can't- I can't lose you again.” Raelle shifted her gaze to her feet, desperately fighting back the tears that were spilling over.

Scylla couldn't take it anymore, whether it was Raelle's confession, or the fissures in her usually impenetrable facade that Scylla could see clear as day, she couldn't tell, but it awoke something inside the brunette. A fire long thought to be extinguished roared to life as she surged forward, capturing the blonde's lips with her own. Raelle's shock evaporated quickly as they kissed, years of longing and tears mixing as their lips moved against one another. Scylla pulled back and Raelle tried to stifle the tightening in her chest as she prepared for another rejection. 

It never came. 

This time, instead of completely pulling away, Scylla remained close, pressing their foreheads together and grounding both herself and Raelle with her hands firmly placed on either side of the blonde's face.

They remained like that for a few moments, breaths intermingling and becoming one in the limited space between them.

“How could you think for even a second that I would ever not love you?” Scylla asked, searching Raelle's eyes as she spoke.

“It, it’s just...it’s just after last time…”

Scylla huffed out a laugh as if this was the most ridiculous thing in the world. “Raelle I have never loved anyone BUT you. It's always been you for me and I don't think that'll ever change...but I wasn't lying before when I said I am not the girl you fell in love with all those years ago, Rae. I've changed, for better or for worse and I just...I don't know if you'd still choose the person I am now.”

Raelle looked deep into Scylla's eyes as she spoke, seeing the sadness within, mixing with something else she could not identify. She reached up, grabbing her former lover's hands, holding them against her chest as if they were the most precious treasures in this world. 

"Scylla Ramshorn, how many times do I have to say this before you get it through your head? I  _ love you _ . Any and every version of you, the good and the bad. And yes I know you've changed, how could you not after...everything?" Raelle stumbled over that last part, unsure or unwilling to bring up that particular subject, not when she could see a few of those walls Scylla's erected start to come down. 

"Scyl, we've all changed, but I am willing to get to know this new you. To see all new ways you're going to make me fall helplessly in love all over again, just like I did before, just like I always will, because I'm with you, Scyl, and we can figure it out together, okay? No matter who you are, or who you were, or what anybody else thinks, I'm in, 100%, forever and always. The only question is...are you willing to take that chance?" Raelle took a tiny step back, placing one of her hands out between them, palm up, an invitation. She didn't dare move any closer, letting Scylla make the first move this time, "I know I am." 

Scylla hesitated, all the reasons she would keep the safe distance she had placed between her and Raelle warring with all the reasons she shouldn't. She knew she should back away, take this moment between them for what it was, storing it away for those days when the darkness truly threatened to drown her. She couldn't move. She couldn't pull away from the blonde anymore than Raelle could her, so she stood, frozen in place, weighing what her heart wanted against what her mission would demand but in this moment, with eyes as blue as the heavens above staring at her with softness she hasn't had in years, beckoning to the deepest parts of her soul she knew which side would win.

"I could hurt you," she tried desperately.

"I guess I’ll take that chance.”

“Rae-” 

“This is worth it for me Scyl,  _ you _ are worth it alw-”

That was it, any shred of resolve she had left broke and she brought their lips back together, tears mixing with impassioned sighs and touches so gentle it made her want to weep. Scylla put every question, every ounce of guilt and love that had been weighing her down into the kiss and Raelle took it all, giving just as much back as she received.

They kissed each other breathlessly, breaking the embrace only as their lungs screamed for air but still unable to leave each other’s arms.

“This is at your pace, Scyl. We go as slow as you want, okay?”

Scylla smirked a little, a snarky comment making its way past her lips before she could stop it. 

“And...what if I don’t want to go slow?”

She could feel Raelle’s brow tick upward at her comment, the only sign of her surprise as her stunned expression suddenly morphed into something more akin to mischief. It stirred a feeling deep in Scylla’s belly that she had neither time nor nerve to investigate.

“I can do fast, too,” she replied, snaking her arms around the brunette’s waist and pulling her closer as their lips met once more.


	9. Afterglow

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> No warnings, no summary, just them being them.
> 
> Enjoy! <3

Scylla walked back to her apartment in a daze, her mind spinning and her lips still tingling after the afternoon she spent with Raelle. Whether she’d admit or not, she made a choice, the implications of which she didn’t have the brain space to worry about right now. In this moment, after so long, she actually felt genuinely happy. She giggled at the thought as she passed through her doorway, closing it behind her and heading to her room, unaware of her brother’s gaze following her every move.

The younger Ramshorn was, for lack of a better word, shocked. Did his sister just _giggle?_ He doesn’t think he’s ever heard her make that noise in his life. And she’s been smiling like an idiot since she came in here, none of the snark that usually accompanied her arrival home. Not that the change wasn’t welcomed considering the melancholy mood she left in mere hours ago but, it was a bit unnerving, almost scary. He watched her flit her way around the room...his sister doesn’t _flit_ anywhere!

“Uhm...Scyl?” his sister paused, seeming to have noticed his presence for the first time since entering.

“Oh, hey Sai” he could see her visibly trying to school her features back to a less disturbing level of pep, “what’s up?”

He rose from his position on the couch and approached slowly, not unlike the way someone approached a wild animal...or a mental patient. He closed the distance between them, studying her face before proceeding to poke her.

“Wha- Hey!” she exclaimed, swatting at his hand. “Ever heard of personal space?”

He poked her again and she swatted, giving him a warning look this time “Silas...”

“Who are you and what have you done with my sister?” he joked.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” she asked, caution creeping into her veins.

“Are you kidding? You walk in here grinning so bright you could give the sun a run for its money, you’re all but dancing around this apartment and...” he paused, placing a hand on her shoulder as his face took on a look of faux horror as he continued, “Scyl, you were _giggling_ ”

She shrugged his arm off, praying that the heat she felt in her face was just a figment of her imagination “Was not”

“Uh, yeah you were,” he teased, “What, you find a hot date in the last hour or something? I know you’re good Scyl but even for you that’s-” 

Scylla froze, his voice becoming background noise to the warning bells going off in her mind. She had to physically force herself to calm down, reminding herself that there was no way he could actually know the truth, _no matter how close he kept accidentally stumbling into it._

Her demeanor changed, slipping into the overconfident guise she’s worn for oh so long. She hated having to wear a mask with Silas but, what choice did she have? She couldn’t take the risk of him having the burden of this secret too, or worse, having to choose between him and Raelle, her duty, and her heart. No, she had to keep their secret, for both their sakes.

“That’s for me to know and for you to mind yours little bro” she grinned, flicking his forehead.

“ACH! Scyl, Come on!” he exclaimed, rubbing his forehead and trying to maintain his air of annoyance. He failed, joining in on his sister’s laughter as they rifled through the litany of takeout menus for an acceptable dinner.

They ended up settling on Chinese, again, much to Scylla’s chagrin. In a couple minutes the order had been made and the siblings settled in on the couch for some channel surfing while they waited.

“Hey,” Silas began, calling his sister’s attention away from the show they were pretending to watch. “Look Scyl, you don’t have to tell me what’s got you all smiley okay? Not unless you want to but, I’m just glad you are. You’ve been moping around here so much these past few weeks the colors in here were one shade away from being permanently black and white” he teased.

She cracked a smile. _Had she really been that bad?_

“Thanks,” she said in earnest and he nodded. Maybe the conversation would have continued but, before either of them could utter another word, the doorbell rang signaling that their food had arrived and all possibility of a normal conversation vanished as the siblings dug in.

**_______________**

“You see this too, right Tal?”

The redhead looked up, her eyes following the direction of Abigail’s gaze, eyebrows furrowing at what was causing her incredulity.

“What do you mean? It’s just Rae doing paperwork. Which I guess _is_ kinda weird considering she once semi-seriously contemplated burning the office down just so she wouldn’t have to do her reports, and I mean sure she usually hates paperwork but, considering the terminator mode she’s been in the past couple of weeks I think we should be glad she’s set her sights on-“

“No Tal, _listen._ ”

The redhead shoved down her slight annoyance at being interrupted and did as she was told. Her eyebrows shot up to her hairline the moment she noticed it, she stared at her unit-mate for confirmation 

“Is...is Raelle...humming??” 

“Either that or she finally snapped and is one report away from killing us all,” the Bellweather joked.

They continued watching the smaller girl as she slid across her desk retrieving and replacing files as she worked, unknowingly gravitating closer and closer in their curiosity.

Raelle was so consumed in her task that she hadn’t even noticed them staring, that is, until they were basically on top of her desk.

“Uh, can I help you two?” 

“What were you just doing?” Abigail asked, ignoring her question. Raelle looked at them both, eyes narrowed as she tried to comprehend what game they were playing.

“I was doing my job, you know, that thing that pays our bills? That thing that you two should also be doing? Also, get off my desk!” She finished, poking at their legs that had come to rest on top of her work.

“Rae, you were humming,” Tally provided, shock still clear on her face.

Raelle’s eyes widened for a split second before she forced herself not to react, lest her face give away a secret she was not ready to tell.

“Last I checked, getting a song stuck in your head wasn’t a crime,” she defended.

She focused on the papers on her desk, the feeling of Tally’s and Abigail’s eyes staring her down making her want to squirm. 

Tally let out a loud gasp.

_F***s sake please no,_ she groaned.

“What?” Abigail asked, lost to whatever new information Tally had gleaned.

“No. _Way_!”

She tried staring her down but it was no use, Tally had her and she knew it.

“What, Tal?”

Raelle stared at Tally, a silent plea in her eyes, a last-ditch effort to maintain some semblance of peace in her life.

“Raelle found a _girl_!” She squealed and Abigail went slack-jawed, her head whipping back around so fast Raelle considered sending her to the infirmary for whiplash.

_Still might if it’ll get me out of this conversation, she mused._

“Awwww,” Abigail cooed, “Our grumpy little heartbreaker has finally met her match!” She reached over, pinching Raelle’s cheeks. 

“Will you keep your mitts to yourself?” The blonde growled and swatted at her hand making her laugh as she settled in on her desk perch.

_Great_

“So do tell, who is this mystery girl who has tamed the untamable?”

“She’s no one-”

“Lies,” Tally interjected. Raelle glared but apparently, she didn’t have the same effect on the redhead that Tally had on well...everyone.

_Fan-freaking-tastic_

“Come on Rae, tell us!”

“Yeah Collar, this is like prime time news, the people deserve to know,” she reasoned and Tally nodded along.

Raelle rolled her eyes at their antics, her anger dissipating as the seconds ticked on (also the longer Abigail restrained herself from pinching her cheeks).

She stared them down for a moment longer, their gazes never faltering in their silent battle. She blinked 

“Ha!” Abigail exclaimed in victory, “now tell us!”

She sighed “Okay look-“

“Is she pretty?” Tally interrupted.

Raelle thought of Scylla’s eyes, those deep pools of blue that she would gladly drown in if they beckoned her

“Yeah but-“

“Ooh is she smart? We can’t have an idiot in the family, Rae”

She thought of that smirk Scylla got when she knew she had a perfectly witty comeback that would probably knock Raelle off her game for the hundredth time that day

“Of course but-“

“Ooh, you should invite her to movie night!” Tally added

“Oh yeah,” Abigail exclaimed “Get her on our turf, then we can see if she’s good enough for you”

“Or,” Tally offered, giving Abigail a look, “we could be chill and just meet the girl that’s captured our little Rae’s heart,” she cooed, reaching over to pinch Raelle’s cheeks but retracting her hand when the blonde glared at it.

“I’m not little,” she mumbled, “anyways, doesn’t matter, guys-”

“Ooh does she like horror movies? ‘Cause if not it’s a no from me”

“Hey!” Tally gasped, offended.

“You’re the exception Tally, you know that”

“GUYS!”

“What?!”

Raelle took a calming breath, wiping her hand down her face before she continued.

“I’m not telling you anything about her, and I am most CERTAINLY not bringing her to movie night with this circus in attendance-“

“Wha-“

She raised a hand, cutting off their protests. 

“I’m just not ready to share her with anyone yet okay? We’re taking it slow, getting to know each other for a bit?” She looked at their slightly fallen expressions, sighed, and decided to throw them a bone “But,” she almost reneged after the way they perked up at her continuation, “I’ll ask her about movie night okay? And if it’s not too much for her I’ll _consider_ bringing her over-“ she held a hand up again to stop the squeal she could sense about to come, this next part was important “ _But,” she continued, “_ I will kill you both in your sleep if you scare her off, you got that Bellweather?”

“Hey, why am I the one being warned?”

Raelle and Tally exchanged a look before their gaze flickered over to Abigail, a silent answer.

“Yeah okay fine,” she conceded, “I’ll behave” she raised her hands in surrender and Raelle lost a little of the tension in her shoulders, her happy mood slowly trickling back in.

“Okay good, now that we have that all settled can I get back to being the only one on this team who actually _does_ their job?” she raised an eyebrow and both Tally and Abigail rolled their eyes but acquiesced, slowly peeling themselves off her desk and heading back to their own.

“Thank you,” Raelle said, smiling in spite of herself. She really did love those two idiots _even if they do give her a headache half the time_ she chuckled. And she was sure Scylla would love them too...well...she’d love Tally, Abigail might be an interesting mix that she was both intrigued and terrified to find out about. Either way, she didn’t want to push the other girl into too much too soon, she just got her back and she’ll be damned if she lets anything get between them. She might not know what’s between them right now, it’s new, different but somehow familiar in all the best ways. She could feel her face morph into a smile, the mere thought of the brunette lightening her mood further. She shook her head at herself as she tried to school her expression lest the circus return.

Regardless, whatever this was between them was something she cherished and was excited to learn more about.

**_______________**

Scylla collapsed into her bed with an oomph. Exhaustion, and adrenaline running through her. She had spent the better part of the last two hours working out and sparring with her brother. She sighed, sinking deeper into her mattress, reveling in the comfort it provided, soothing her aching muscles. As she lay there, her mind began wandering. Down the hall and around the corner to a pair of arms, a roguish grin and honest eyes that never asked anything from her that she wasn’t willing to give. She smiled to herself, allowing this one moment just to wonder, to pretend for a moment that they weren’t who they were, that they were just two young women courting each other. That she could afford the butterflies that rumbled in her belly everytime her mind wandered to the blonde. Her smile widened and she wondered what Raelle was up to right this minute. 

The sun was setting outside her window, its golden rays bringing back to memory the evening they had yesterday and making Scylla blush. Surely she wasn’t at work anymore. Was she out with those partners of hers? She wasn’t too much the partying type but, given the chance...and some incentive she could make do.

She can’t remember the last time she smiled this much in one afternoon. No, that was a lie, she did remember, she remembered it like it was yesterday because Raelle had been the cause of it even then. Her mood soured slightly as she remembered exactly what had wiped that smile from her face, from her heart. It was the same reason she was allowed this small respite in her long march to revenge. She was cheating, she knew that. People like her didn’t get the girl, they didn’t get happy endings. What she did, what she’s done, requires too much darkness for her to ever truly live in the light but still, she found herself craving it. She reached for the light, Raelle’s light because it was the only thing that seemed to truly keep the darkness that consumed her at bay, if only for a little while.

_She deserves better,_ she thought, and it was the truth. Raelle deserved someone that didn’t carry their darkness with them wherever they went. She deserved someone who would feed her light, not steal it. She deserved someone who wasn’t actively _betraying her_ and she knew that but, for some reason Raelle still wanted _her._ The blonde saw her darkness, there’s no way she couldn’t have. She wore it like a cloak, shielding her from everything and everyone that could cause her pain, and yet she still wanted her. Still offered her a light in the dark and a charming smile.

Scylla knew she didn’t deserve her, she knew that one day, probably one day soon, her mission would call for something that would no doubt result in her losing Raelle, and it killed her. There was no doubt in her mind that losing Raelle a second time would actually kill her, but she accepted that fate. She had resigned herself to it the moment she accepted this mission and there was no going back now. All that was left was for her to enjoy the time she did have with her. Sure, the time may be borrowed, but borrowed or not she would make the most of it. 

She got to her feet then and made her way to the door, determination in her footsteps as she stepped into her boots, lacing them up before grabbing a jacket from the rack they had set up by the door.

“Where are you off to in such a hurry?” Silas asked, a handful of froot loops resting halfway between the box and his face.

“Going for a walk,” she lied, a little too easily but she would deal with that later.

Her brother raised a disbelieving eyebrow, but shrugged it off “Okay, don’t get snatched!” he shouted as he settled on the couch.

She chuckled, “I’ll do my best,” and then she was out the door.

A few steps later and she found herself knocking on a certain blonde FBI agent’s door, hoping she was home. _She was._ A few seconds later a slightly confused Raelle opened the door, her expression already melting into a soft smile she seemed to only reserve for Scylla.

“Hey, I was just thinking about coming to see you,” she said as she planted a kiss on Scylla’s cheek. “What’s up?”

Scylla paused, she hadn’t really thought this far ahead. She had just wanted to see Raelle and that’s about as far as she’d gotten.

“Uh...Scyl?”

The look of concern on Raelle’s face told her she had remained silent a touch too long, she needed to think fast so she blurted out the first thing that came to mind.

“Do you, uh, wanna go out?”

“Out?” Raelle asked, “Out where?”

Her face was feigning ignorance but her eyes danced with just enough mischief that Scylla had a sneaking suspicion that Raelle knew exactly _what_ she was asking and she was going to make her work for it.

She took a breath, squaring her shoulders before she spoke again.

“Raelle, would you like to go out with me? On a date...maybe...dinner?”

A slow grin spread across the blonde’s face that made Scylla forget her anxiety about the situation, her anxieties about a lot of things actually.

“Yeah Scyl, I would love to. How about tonight?”

_Tonight?!_

“Tonight? Yeah, sure”

“Cool, I'll come by around 8?”

“Sure”

“Great! Uhm,” she paused for a second in consideration.

Scylla would have asked what was on her mind but she got her answer fairly quickly when Raelle leaned in, her hand lightly caressing Scylla’s cheek as she placed the softest of kisses on her lips.

“I’ll see you at eight, yeah?” Raelle breathed.

“Yeah” Scylla responded, swaying a bit when Raelle released her hold and stepped back through her door.

It was only after she made it back to her own apartment, the door clicking shut behind her that her brain caught up with what was happening. She had just agreed to go on a date. With Raelle. Tonight. The realization hit that she really didn’t know _how_ to go on dates anymore. Being a Spree agent didn’t leave much time for a real social life and she doubted any of the things she had done with Porter really counted.

_Shit_


	10. I See Fire

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know, I know, I missed a week and I'm sorry.  
> I needed a mental health week but we're back.  
> We're back to slightly longer chapters so I hope you guys enjoy!

There’s only one word for what Raelle was feeling in this moment. Her pulse was quicker than usual, she felt just a bit lightheaded and her palms wouldn’t stop sweating. It was ridiculous. It’s not like this was someone new she was going out with. Raelle knew Scylla. Had known her for most of her life and although she would never admit it out loud, had pined for her through the rest. This was what she had wanted ever since she stumbled into the brunette all those weeks ago in the hallway. It had been the subject of many of her daydreams for years now and yet here she was, thoughts racing a mile a minute as they all drew down to one conclusion. Raelle was nervous.

She never got nervous. She was a freaking FBI field agent for crying out loud! Cool under pressure wasn’t just the job description, it _was_ the job. Yet here she was, straightening non-existent crinkles in her fifth shirt for the night, unsatisfied and running out of time. She was supposed to pick Scylla up in 10 minutes yet here she was, still in front of her mirror, navy blue button-up rolled up to her elbow and staring at flaws she knew existed only in her head.

_It’s Navy, Scylla loves navy...right?_

_Maybe she used to but now...who knows?_

_Uggghhh_!

She groaned, flopping down onto her bed, covering her eyes with her forearm.

_What if that’s not the only thing that changed?_ she contemplated, unwilling to give thought to her worries but being unable to ignore them either.

_Only one way to find out, right?_ She heaved a sigh as she hopped back to her feet, giving herself one last “look-over” before her phone announced her five-minute warning.

_Now or never, Collar_.

She nodded to herself before turning on her heel and heading toward her door, grabbing her phone and keys on the way.

**_______________**

She has hunted down deadly criminals, dodged bullets meant to bring her end, and survived more kidnappings than any normal person ever has (granted a good number of them were by the Spree themselves but that was beside the point). She had stared death and danger in the face and didn’t bat an eye and yet, after all that, the thing that got her, the thing that was making her heart flutter and her hands shake was a date with Raelle Collar.

She had dodged her brother’s questions about her nerves all afternoon, writing off her behavior as concern for their “mission”. For a few hours, she even managed to fool herself into believing that. She had an early dinner with Silas, watched some tv, and gracefully retired to her room to get dressed for her date.

_Her date._

A part of her still couldn’t believe that she was about to go on a date with her ex-girlfriend. No, not her ex, with _Raelle_. She still had her doubts about what will come from all this, after all, it was only a matter of time before she would be forced to make a choice, and for the first time in a long time, she wasn’t sure what her choice would be.

She sighed, shaking the thoughts from her head. She didn’t have time to think about that now. In a few minutes, her doorbell would ring and she would have to have her game face on. These thoughts were problems for future Scylla to worry about. _Current_ Scylla just wanted one night to pretend. To remember what it was like to be _normal_. To believe that she could actually let herself be swept off her feet by a charming smile and dazzling eyes. She gave herself one last look and heaved a sigh, her reflection looking at her almost sympathetically.

Lost in her thoughts she hadn’t heard the doorbell ring or the ensuing “ _I’ll get it!_ ” that was shouted in response. It wasn’t until she got tired of the staring contest she was having with her reflection and made her way out to the living room that she was made aware of the tension building literally at her doorstep.

“So what exactly is it that you _do,_ Collar?” Silas asked, intentionally blocking Raelle’s way into the apartment.

“Uh, I’m in law enforcement,” Raelle responded, sounding a little unsure.

“ _Interesting._ ” the younger Ramshorn almost spat the word, his eyes scrutinizing every inch of the blonde.

“Sai, be nice,” Scylla said, coming up behind him and placing a warning hand on his shoulder.

Raelle visibly relaxed once Scylla presented herself, her stance getting less stiff and her eyes less guarded. A lazy smile spread itself across her face as she took a step forward to greet her date for the night only to be stopped by a five-foot-seven blockade, still staring her down and forcing her to rock back on her heels.

Scylla laughed nervously, “Sai,” she squeezed his shoulder, gaining his attention as she inched her way around him and toward Raelle. “I got this, okay? I’ll be fine.”

He scrutinized her for a moment, his gaze momentarily flickering to the blonde behind her before returning to his sister. He sighed, nodding and relaxing his stance as well.

“I’ll see you later, okay?” she assured him, pulling him in for a hug before gently nudging him back through the door and closing it behind her before turning to face Raelle, who was still frozen in place, eyes glued to the brunette in a way that made Scylla’s heart rate quicken.

“Hey.”

Raelle blinked. “Hey, hi, um, you look...wow.”

Scylla flushed at the awe in Raelle’s eyes. She was looking at her the way a blind man looks, seeing the light for the first time, or the way a starving man looks at his first meal. The way a person looks at someone they lo-

“You look pretty wow yourself,” she responded, pleased when Raelle seemed to stand a little taller at the compliment.

“Well,” Raelle cleared her throat, “shall we?” she finished, stepping aside and offering her arm for Scylla to take.

She chuckled, looping her arm through Raelle’s. 

“Lead the way.”

**_______________**

Scylla had been prepared to learn all the ways Raelle had changed over the years, to hear her stories and marvel at her exploits. That was expected. After all, twelve years was no small amount of time, there was bound to be many things to learn. She was, however, happy to know that, regardless of how much time had passed, one thing still hadn’t changed. Raelle was still a romantic. The restaurant they were at proved it.

She gazed up at the edifice through her window, not noticing that Raelle had already hopped out and was making her way to her side of the car. She chuckled as the blonde pulled her door open and offered her hand.

“Maybe chivalry isn’t dead after all,” she snarked, unable to help herself.

Raelle huffed, closing the door, “Not when you’re with me, Scyl.”

_I have no doubt._

Scylla smiled, allowing herself to be led into the restaurant. Raelle was speaking to the host, something about a table for two, but Scylla didn’t quite catch the rest as she was distracted by the scenery before her. There were no lights here, not really anyway, save for the soft glow of a large chandelier in the middle of the room. The tables themselves were each adorned with a single electric candle in the center. She was vaguely aware of being pulled forward once more and her feet followed even if her mind was still lost in the simple beauty of their venue. Raelle, for her part, seemed content to let Scylla take it all in, only interrupting once they were ushered to their table and had pulled Scylla’s chair out for her before rounding the table to her own.

“Rae this is…” Scylla fumbled for a word to fully describe the restaurant, her eyes eventually coming to rest on Raelle, “...beautiful”

“I’m glad you like it,” Raelle said, holding her gaze for a moment before clearing her throat and directing her attention to the menu before her. “So, what’re you thinking?”

That was a loaded question in more ways than one, but, in the interest of her own peace of mind, Scylla, too, focused on the menu before her, eyebrows scrunching slightly with her concentration.

“Hmmm, well-”

“Can I get you ladies started with some drinks?”

They both looked up at their waitress who, at the very least, looked a little apologetic at interrupting their ‘conversation’. Just as well, Scylla hadn’t truly known what she wanted anyway and the menu was not exactly the sort you would find at Spree HQ. 

_Damn, she was out of practice._ She looked up, noticing both the waitress and Raelle staring at her when she remembered, _oh._

“Oh uhm, wine for me, thanks.”

“Beer,” Raelle added simply.

Their waitress quickly scribbled down their order and turned with a “Coming right up” before leaving them to their own devices once more.

“So,” Raelle began.

“So,” Scylla parroted.

“Here we are.”

“We are here.”

Raelle’s eyes narrowed, Scylla stared back, reaching forward to take a sip of her water, eyes never leaving Raelle’s as she did so.

Raelle chuckled, “This is...”

“Awkward?” Scylla supplied.

“Extremely awkward, yes,” Raelle laughed, her head falling into her hands.

“Well,” Scylla began, “I wouldn’t necessarily say _extremely_ but...” she shrugged, a contemplative look plastered on her face. 

Raelle blanched, “Well, I didn’t mean like _extremely_ extremely, I just meant-”

“Rae, relax,” Scylla laughed, “I’m just teasing. You’re fine.” she finished, reaching across the table to take Raelle’s hand in hers, smiling when she relaxed under the touch.

A nervous laugh escaped Raelle’s lips as she relaxed under the brunette’s touch, “Not even gonna give me a break on our second first date, huh?”

“Oh, not a chance.” 

They both erupted in laughter only calming down when the waitress finally returned with their drinks, taking their dinner orders before quickly scurrying off once more.

**_______________**

After dinner, the conversation flowed seamlessly between them, bringing back fond memories for Scylla as Raelle laughed and talked animatedly about her unit and all the hijinks they had gotten into on and off the job. That nervous voice of warning in the back of her head got quieter as the night drew on, leaving her mind in a rare moment of calm. She liked it.

“Oh my gosh.”

The sudden change in Raelle’s tone snapped her to attention as she instinctively scanned the room for any sign of danger, her body preparing to fight or flee as the situation called for it. She finished her scan, finding nothing and eventually landing back on Raelle whose face had taken on a look of wonder and maybe, if Scylla looked hard enough, a bit of mischief as the crystal blue of Raelle’s eyes focused on her.

“What?” 

Instead of answering, Raelle slid out of her seat and sidled up to Scylla’s side, offering a hand to her which Scylla instinctively took. A surprised yelp escapes her lips as she is tugged up and out onto the dance floor.

“Now, if I remember correctly,” Raelle begins, spinning them around till they were in the center of the floor, “you used to _love_ dancing.” she finishes, an effortlessly charming smile on her lips.

Scylla huffs but does not protest as Raelle twirls her beneath an arm before pulling her in even closer than before.

_Definitely not protesting._

“Hmmm, that’s actually really funny because I remember a certain blonde almost incessantly insisting that I dance with her until _eventually,_ I had no choice but to give in,” she replies, a challenge in her eyes.

Raelle chuckled, unperturbed “I don’t recall any complaints,” she began, arms tightening around Scylla’s waist and pulling her impossibly closer. “In fact,” she paused, bringing her face just shy of Scylla’s, leaving but a hair's breadth between them as she spoke, “I’d venture to say you enjoyed our... _dances_ just fine.”

Scylla chalked the heat in her cheeks up to that last glass of wine and not Raelle’s proximity.

_Damnit, Ramshorn, get it together._

“Why Detective Collar, if I didn’t know any better I’d think you were trying to seduce me,” she shot back.

That earned her a smile, “Me? Seduce a lady?” she led them into another twirl, “no ma’am, wouldn’t dream of it.”

Scylla laughed, “Sure you wouldn’t,” she teased and Raelle’s smile widened.

They danced the rest of the song in silence, both content to just _be_. It was nice.

Scylla closed her eyes and leaned her head against Raelle’s chest, listening to the steady thrum of her heart, gently teasing when she heard it speed up. Songs came and went in much the same fashion but they didn’t care, they remained connected, moving to a shared rhythm.

The night remained calm after that. Scylla made the suggestion that they walk back to their building when, after a few minutes of fumbling with her keys, Raelle still failed to open her own car. Scylla made a career out of many risks with her own life but this wouldn’t be one of them, especially when Raelle was involved.

The walk was nice. Raelle pointed out little hangouts on their way, a story behind each one, and a smile came to her lips whenever Scylla expressed interest in the possibility of visiting one in the future.

She insisted on walking Raelle back to her apartment before returning to her own. They had gotten to the door but instead of parting ways, they both lingered.

“I had a really good time with you tonight, Rae.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah,” Scylla smiled, “it was fun...the dancing wasn’t _horrible_ either.” she acquiesced.

Raelle’s face lit right up at that. “I’ll make a dancer out of you yet, Ramshorn,” she hummed.

Scylla chuckled, her hands unconsciously gravitating toward Raelle’s and an old but familiar warmth spreading in her chest when they connected.

She could feel the warmth of Raelle’s breath against her face as the blonde leaned forward, placing a kiss on her cheek.

“I had a really good time with you too, Scyl,” she whispered, leaning back, “can’t think of a better way to spend my Saturday,” she finished, meeting the brunette’s eyes.

Scylla could only stare, unable to move under the weight of emotion she could see behind Raelle’s usually icy blues. It was intense. It spoke of thoughts she knew the blonde would not voice. Not under their new circumstances, but thoughts Scylla could decipher nonetheless if she truly let herself. 

Silence fell between them once more but, there was something different about it this time. It wasn’t awkward, or tense. It had an air to it that Scylla wasn’t quite sure she wanted to put a name to.

“I should go,” she said, making no real move to leave.

“You could stay,” Raelle offered, her eyes never leaving the brunette's face, their hands still entwined between them.

“This is not taking it slow,” Scylla tried again, willing her feet to go, to do the ‘right’ thing and maintain the pace she promised herself to set with Raelle, her quickening heart rate giving away her true desires.

Raelle remained still, quietly watching the emotions play themselves out on the brunette’s face.

“We shouldn't do this,” she tried again, unsure if she was saying it more to herself or Raelle, evidently her _self_ wasn't listening as her body unconsciously continued to gravitate towards the blonde.

They crashed through Raelle's door, barely having the presence of mind to close it behind themselves as hands and lips grasped hungrily at each other. Raelle all but ripped Scylla's shirt from her body, pausing only to take in the portrait before her. Scylla was a vision, an absolute goddess whose altar Raelle would gladly worship at for as long as she was allowed.

“You are so beautiful,” she breathed.

Scylla's eyelids fluttered open at the benediction, the sheer emotion in the words calling to something deep within her, something the brunette had thought long gone. It was scary and exciting all at once. The way her body and her mind, her _soul_ seemed to stir and wake with renewed life under Raelle’s darkened gaze warmed Scylla in a way she hadn’t felt in ages.

What little control she had left evaporated in an instant when Raelle’s mouth returned to hers, her tongue swiping over Scylla’s lips, asking, waiting for permission that was swiftly granted as they continued to stumble their way through the apartment.

She hit Raelle’s mattress with a gasp as the blonde positioned shifted them both into a more comfortable position, never pausing in her ever frustrating ministrations. The warmth in Scylla’s chest spread throughout her body with every touch, small flames licking and lapping at her very being burning her up from the inside in the most exquisite way.

Her breaths became stuttered as Raelle moved from her lips to her jaw, down to her throat, pausing momentarily to lavish attention on a spot just by her ear that drove Scylla crazy. So lost was she in the sensation of it all that she failed to conceal a whimper when Raelle leaned up and away, an almost imperceptible smug smirk on her face as she searched Scylla’s for...something.

Scylla met her gaze evenly, the flames in her body only intensifying the longer she was deprived of the blonde’s touch. A few torturous moments later, Raelle found her voice.

“Are you...are you sure about this?” 

Scylla stared, a look of confusion on her face as her brain tried to work its way out of the Raelle filled haze to comprehend her words. 

“I- I know you want to take things slow, and I’m still fully okay with that. I promised your pace Scyl and this- I just want to make sure you really want this and it’s not-”

“Shhhh,” she soothed, her hands caressing either side of Raelle’s face until the worry in her eyes melted away. 

“I want this, Raelle,” Scylla reassured, “I want _you._ ”

And despite her better judgment, she did. Every inch of her conscious mind knew this was a bad idea, that allowing herself this indulgence could not end well, not with who they both were, but, she didn’t care. She didn’t care if the world came crashing down around them at this very moment because at least she would have had this. At least she would have _her._

“Are you sure?” Raelle asked once more, the muscles in her arm and jaw straining under the sheer force of her will.

Instead of answering, Scylla pulled her into a searing kiss that left both their breaths ragged and shallow. Raelle began her descent down to Scylla’s jaw and neck once more, pausing to lavish attention on that same spot just below her ear. A few choice nips and licks as well a thigh placed in exactly the right spot had the brunette writhing beneath her, her soft moans and whimpers all the approval Raelle needed as her hands drifted over Scylla’s bodice, charting paths explored long ago as if they were completely new, rediscovering every dip and curve and secret spot that would drive Scylla wild.

Their breaths came faster and harder, Scylla’s back arching as calloused hands finally made their way to where she needed them most. The heat in her core a blazing inferno pushing and burning for release, escaping her as she whispered the blonde’s name like a prayer as Raelle moved faster and with renewed purpose. The building tension in her gut finally snapping, a soft moan swallowed by soft lips as Raelle helped her down from her high, leaving her breathless and spent once that release finally came.

She curled into Raelle’s side, her breath still ragged and her body still craving the warmth of their contact.

“That was-”

“Yeah.”

They both laughed in spite of themselves, Raelle’s arms encircling Scylla as they waited for their breathing to return to normal. It was quiet in their little bubble. The only sounds pervading their space were the sounds of their breaths and Raelle’s heartbeat in Scylla’s ears. For once, there were no warring voices in her mind, there were no voices at all, only peace.

“Are you okay?” Raelle asked, breaking the silence.

Scylla smiled, “No.”

She lifted her head slightly so that she could look into Raelle’s eyes and chuckled at the worry etched across her face. She raised the hand that had been idly drawing circles on her chest to her face and leaned in for a kiss. Raelle met her halfway on instinct, confusion still playing in her eyes. 

“No, I’m not _okay,_ Rae,” Scylla began, her thumb gently caressing the blonde’s cheek as she continued, “I’m...perfect.” The smile that spread across Raelle’s face at her statement all but stole her breath away. She hadn’t realized just how much she had missed that smile until now.

“Damn right you are- Ow! Hey!” she chuckled, catching the hand Scylla had used to swat her arm and entwining their fingers.

“I am not and you know what I meant,” Scylla chuckled, ”I’m happy.”

“Me too.”

They both sobered a little, lost in their own thoughts, their own fantasies.

“I missed you so much, Rae.” Scylla confessed before leaning and pressing another kiss to Raelle’s lips. Then another, and another, each kiss growing more heated than the last as she rolled on top of the blonde, using their entwined hands as her anchor while her free hand charted its way from Raelle’s face to her chest and even lower, her lips following suit.

“My turn.”

**_______________**

Scylla woke with a start some time later, her eyes roaming her surroundings as her mind caught up to the present. A digital clock on the nightstand drew her attention and she internally cursed when she realized what time it was. The sun would be coming up any moment now and she had not gone home. Sai would have so many questions, none of which she could really answer. She cursed again.

A muted grumble brought her back to the present as the arm slung over her torso tightened and a face pressed deeper into her back.

“Hey,” came the sleepy voice a few seconds later.

Scylla’s heart could be forgiven for doing a little backflip at the sound, she was only human after all.

“Hi,” she responded, rolling over so they were face to face.

“Don’t take this the wrong way but...for all the times I tried to get you to get up before noon and _this_ is the one you pick?”

Scylla chuckled. “Special occasion?”

“Very special,” Raelle smiled, leaning closer and pressing a kiss to Scylla’s forehead, then to her nose, then finally placing a lingering one on her lips. Her arm tightened around Scylla’s waist, pulling her impossibly closer and deepening the kiss.

A familiar heat began to radiate through Scylla’s body and as much as she wanted to lean into the contact, to let the heat build a burn through her body she couldn’t. She had to stop this.

“I have to go,” she breathed, breaking the kiss but not the contact, her mind and body pulling her in different directions. She took a deep breath to steady herself before continuing, “Sai will be wondering where I disappeared to. Gotta get back before he calls in the National Guard,” she joked.

Raelle chuckled “I think I can handle them. Beautiful woman in my bed? Might be worth it,” she whispered, pressing another kiss to Scylla’s lips.

Scylla sighed leaning into the contact, that warning voice in her head getting quieter by the second as Raelle’s hand came made its way to the back of her neck, pulling her impossibly closer.

“ _Raelle,_ ” she groaned as the lips moved from her mouth down to her neck.

“Fine,” Raelle groaned, “but let the record show I am not happy about this,” she griped.

“Noted,” Scylla chuckled, placing one final kiss on Raelle’s lips before rolling out of bed.

Raelle helped her follow the trail of clothes they had left in their wake the night before, each step unlocking a memory that made it harder and harder for Scylla to walk out the door.

“See you later?” Raelle asked, hope in her eyes.

“Again? And here I thought you’d were just using me for sex and you’d be sick of me by now,” Scylla teased.

“Oh, I am,” Raelle responded, leaning in for another kiss that Scylla had to break, earning an eye roll from the older girl, “but,” she continued, “what kind of girl would I be if I didn’t at least offer you coffee in gratitude?”

Scylla laughed as she slipped out the door.

“Later, then,” she agreed

“Later,” Raelle responded, hand lingering in the air as Scylla’s slipped away and down the hall.

Scylla couldn’t stop the smile that was plastered across her face the whole walk back to her apartment. Distantly she was aware that she had definitely broken an innumerable number of rules which would probably come back to bite her at some point, but she couldn’t bring herself to care. She could still feel the warmth of Raelle’s hands and body where they pressed against her own. Her lips still tingled from every kiss they shared and her mind was still riding the high of the night they shared. 

She hadn’t felt this way in so long. She felt _alive_ . Colors were brighter, her breaths fuller and her heart _whole._ She shouldn’t have been surprised really. Raelle had long since been her home away from home. Even back then.

She was still contemplating these things when she walked through the door to her own apartment.

“Agent Ramshorn,” came a booming voice. 

Scylla’s stomach plummeted. She knew that voice, and even more, she knew what it meant. She looked up at the three people now in her apartment, her jaw set and shoulders squared. All traces of the euphoria from the night before melted away being replaced by a coldness that was all too familiar to her.

“We need to talk.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> PS: this is my first time writing anything even close to being sexy so like...be gentle?


	11. When it Rains...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Worlds collide

_ FUCK. _

Scylla cursed for the hundredth time that morning. She had been berating herself and pacing back and forth for the better part of the last few hours. Her mind was running a mile a minute, trying to find any scenario where she wasn’t absolutely and totally screwed. She knew this would happen. She  _ knew _ and yet she had still let herself fall. She had given in to weakness and now she would pay the price. Now, they would  _ all  _ pay the price.

How could she be so stupid? She knew the rules, knew what she was getting into when she accepted this mission and yet, none of it had mattered once she was in her arms. A decade of training, of carefully constructed walls, all disintegrated into dust as she was captivated. Captivated by a charming grin, eyes bluer than the sky itself that held promises of a freedom Scylla could only dream of in their depths, arms that promised safety, and something else that Scylla hadn’t had for longer than she’d let herself admit. She could still feel the warmth Raelle’s touches brought radiating all over her body like a duller version of the inferno the blonde had awoken within her earlier. 

She cursed herself for having these feelings. She shouldn’t _ want _ these things. She had no right to them. Any hope she had of sustaining even a semblance of this fantasy evaporated the day she took this oath and she knew that, had accepted it and even welcomed it at times. The problem was, the person who had made those promises was younger and so full of rage and pain. She was empty and making the decision to give up her life for those she had loved was an easy one. 

_ Maybe even a foolish one. _

She shook her head at the thought.

_ No. It wasn’t foolish. They were good people.  _ Peaceful _ people. They deserved better. _

She thought, a familiar prickling at the back of her eyes like any other time she thought of them. 

_ So do you, _ a familiar voice that sounded suspiciously like her mom whispered. 

She allowed a single tear to fall and no more. She couldn’t afford any more. She had a job to do and that left no time for anything else. There was no room for error on this one. Not with so much at stake.

**_______________**

_ Scylla walked into the apartment, wary eyes flickering between the two new additions as she made her way toward the group. _

_ “Agent Ramshorn, so nice to see you are well,” Porter greeted. _

_ Distantly, Scylla pondered the reason for his odd greeting. After all, Porter never used her last name when speaking to her. Ever. Why would he do so now? She nodded her head in greeting as she eyed the agent at his side. _

_ “The boss deciphered that file you acquired from that blonde FBI agent,” the boy began, not noticing the way Scylla’s jaw clenched at the mention of said ‘blonde agent’. “Turns out the agency isn’t as daft as we give them credit for-” _

_ “Shocking,” Silas quipped, earning a chuckle from the other two. _

_ “Yeah, well, for all their blunders, they’ve actually managed to stumble onto one of our active safehouses,” Porter pointed out. _

_ “How’d they do that?” Scylla inquired with genuine curiosity, “Most of  _ us _ don’t even know what the houses look like on the outside unless-” her eyes widened, the realization dawning on her mere seconds before Porter confirmed it himself. Someone had gotten caught. Even worse, they were taken  _ alive.

“ _ Regardless, we have been tasked with intercepting and thwarting their team and ensuring that the agents and information in the storehouse remain safe. _ ”

_ “Okay,” Scylla nodded, still a bit confused. She was missing something. Sure, a safehouse full of agents and intel being discovered was bad but the Spree had an entire base filled with agents that could deal with this and if that was the case, why bring it to her? Why risk her active op just to...what...keep her informed? There was no way, so what was it? _

_ Some piece of information gnawed at the back of Scylla’s consciousness as she pondered, lost in her musings and unable to grasp what was about to unfold. _

_ “Why bring this to us?” she spoke up, interrupting whatever line of conversation the other were going down. _

_Porter shot her a look, “From the information we’ve gathered, we think that this is the team they’ll send,”_ _he responded, clicking away at the keyboard, searching for the images he needed and nodding once he found them and turning the laptop toward the brunette for inspection._

_ Her heart stopped. There was a lump forming in the back of her throat that seemed to only get bigger the more her thoughts swirled. _

No this...this can’t be happening.

Not now, not...not yet.

_ She pleaded with no one in particular, trying desperately to keep the emotions off her face as she stared into a pair of sharp blue eyes. The same eyes that had looked at her with such adoration not ten minutes ago. The same eyes she would have to stare into once again as she betrayed their trust. _

No, no, no.

_ “The boss says we only need to stall them long enough to empty the house,” Porter continued, oblivious to the storm brewing not 2 feet from him. “We don’t need the heat so unless absolutely necessary, no kill shots,” he said seriously. _

_ “And what if it becomes necessary?” Silas asked. _

_ Porter’s eyes flickered to Scylla for a brief second before answering, “We do what we must.” He answered simply.  _

_ “We leave tonight,” the other agent declared, “We’ll be standing guard a mile down the road from the house here,” he began, pointing at a section of road close to a red  _ X _ marking the safehouse. “We capture one of them if possible, if not, we stall them for as long as possible, got it?” _

_ “Got it.” _

**_______________**

Raelle sat contemplatively in the back seat of their shared car as Abigail drove them to the mission point. It had been a weird day to say the least. She had woken up with the woman she lo — with the most beautiful woman in the world in her arms, as they shared lazy kisses that sent electricity running down her spine. It had been amazing, and though she was a bit disappointed when Scylla slipped out in the morning, her spirits had been high throughout the rest of the day as she anticipated their coffee date. That’s when things had gotten  _ weird _ .

Scylla had seemed distracted all day. She didn’t even tease Raelle like she usually did and there had been many opportunities to do so, some even set up by Raelle herself when her concern grew beyond mild curiosity but still,  _ nothing. _ Had she done something wrong? Said something maybe? Had Scylla been regretting their night? And worst of all, was she about to disappear again? Goddess, she hoped not. Raelle squeezed her eyes shut, willing the thoughts away as she couldn’t let herself be drowned in those thoughts right now. She had a job to do and she’d be damned if the Spree slipped through her fingers again because she was distracted. They had been working on this for weeks now and finally,  _ finally, _ they had broken their informant and gotten the location of an active Spree safehouse, and an information hub at that. This was the break they had been waiting for. They could not fail.

“We're going on foot from here,” Abigail announced as she put the vehicle in park. “The safehouse is at the end of this road. The car would alert them to our approach so we’re better off on foot,” she explained and the other two nodded along. 

“Okay, the house is located here,” Raelle began, doing her best to shake off her worry and focus on the task at hand. “We’ll take this road for about 2 miles then head toward the trees here,” she pointed at a copse of trees lining the road, “the house should be only a few clicks to the north after that.” she finished, finally bringing her finger around to their target. 

“What about guards?” Tally asked.

Abigail sighed, “We have some information on that, but we have to assume the guy could have been lying,” she reasoned, “the best we can do is scope the place out from the treeline before making our approach, and then, after that...”

“Hope that the odds are in our favor?” Raelle finished.

“Pretty much, but, if all goes well we should be in and out before they even know what hit them.”

_ Operative word here being ‘if’. _

Raelle sighed as she pulled her gun from its holster, checking it over one last time before they walked into uncertainty.

“You worry too much, Bells,” she began, chuckling as she racked a singular bullet into the chamber before reholstering her sidearm, “what’s the worst that could happen?” 

“You did  _ not _ just say that,” Tally groaned, facepalming as they began their trek.

“Say what?” 

Abigail just laughed and followed after the redhead, leaving a confused Raelle to trail behind them.

“Wait, no guys, seriously, what did I say?”

**_______________**

Scylla was on edge. Her thoughts jumped from one scenario to the next as she narrowly avoided pacing as they waited for Raelle’s team to trip their sensors.

_ Maybe our intel was wrong? Maybe they won’t come? _ She reasoned, but, even in her own head, those hopes seemed hollow. The Spree had been dodging the FBI’s attempts at busting their safehouses for weeks now and each time, at least one member of Raelle’s unit had been on site.

She had to think fast. She would have to walk a razor thin line if her plan was to work and it  _ had _ to work. There were more lives than just her own on the line tonight and one misstep could end with her losing everything.  _ Again _ . She shuddered at the thought, her resolve becoming stronger than ever.

_ This has to work _ .

“Here they come.” 

Scylla stiffened as the voice came over comms. She was out of time.

_ This  _ has _ to work. _

She closed her eyes and took in a deep, steadying breath, expanding her senses and waiting for the tell tale signs that their first trap to be sprung. 

One breath,  _ In and Out.  _ Nothing.

Then another,  _ In and Out, _ answered with only silence. 

After the third breath, even Scylla became a bit antsy. She pressed her finger to her ear, activating the mic on her communication equipment before speaking into it.

“Guys, what’s taking so long?”

“I don’t know,’ Silas responded, “they should have passed Clive’s checkpoint by now.”

Something was wrong.

“Clive, Porter, status report,” Scylla called, her anxiety rising exponentially with every second the line buzzed with silence. “Clive? Porter?” she whispered, an edge of urgency in her voice this time and still, no answer. 

_ Damnit. _

“Something’s wrong, Clive and Porter are- GAH!”

She didn’t get the chance to finish the thought before a strong arm wrapped itself around her waist, a hand clamping down on her mouth as familiar lips brushed against her ear.

“Bet you didn’t see this coming, did ya?” Raelle whispered, her tone oozing with a confidence that would have made Scylla roll her eyes had their situation been a little less dire. Unfortunately for her, this  _ was _ a dire situation, and she absolutely could  _ not _ allow herself to get taken out by Raelle right now. She steeled herself, calling upon every ounce of training she had received, ensuring she chose the right method to break Raelle’s hold on her. Preferably without actually  _ breaking _ Raelle.

_ I’m really sorry about this, Rae. _

Game plan in mind, Scylla bucked forward with as much force as she could muster, using that momentum to swing Raelle over her shoulders and to the ground. The blonde landed with an  _ oomf, _ a look of slight shock and annoyance melting from her face as she scrambled back to her feet and into a fighting stance just in time to dodge the fist coming at her face. 

Raelle charged at her with a different type of storm and fury in her eyes. This wasn’t Raelle the charming romantic whose fire would burn Scylla up in the most exquisite ways, this was Special Agent Raelle Collar, and she was as deadly as she was effective.

Scylla blocked and parried her blows as best she could, but she was fighting with one arm tied behind her back trying not to seriously hurt Raelle. She stumbled as Raelle’s fist grazed her jaw.

_ Too close. _

But that was all the blonde needed. Taking advantage of Scylla’s momentary imbalance, she lunged forward knocking the brunette down, and knocking her out.

She woke a few moments later tied to a tree, an irritated voice burrowing its way into her consciousness and beckoning her awake. Raelle was pacing in front of her, hand pressed to her ear as she whispered to who Scylla could only guess was the rest of her team. 

_ Shit. _

Had she called backup yet? If she had, they would have been here by now, right? How long had she been out? She may not have had the answers to any of these questions, but one thing she did know? She  _ had _ to get out of here. She was lucky enough that Raelle hadn’t yet unmasked her. She tried discreetly reaching for her earpiece in an effort to call for help but to no avail. Her hands didn’t move. She bit back a groan as she looked down at the obstruction. She didn’t have  _ time _ for this. If Raelle’s team got to her before she could make her escape, her cover would be blown and with it, any semblance of normalcy or happiness she had rediscovered in Raelle. On the other hand, if she tried an escape on her own she’d most likely be knocked out again by Raelle.  _ Or worse, _ that annoying voice in her head intoned, and for once, she couldn’t deny it. She knew under normal circumstances, Raelle would never hurt her, however, these weren’t  _ normal _ circumstances. Her hands were metaphorically and  _ literally _ tied.  _ Maybe if I- _

“Morning, sunshine,” Raelle called, a cocky grin on her face.

Scylla looked up, staying silent so as to not give herself away.

“How about we play a little game, hm?” she continued, undeterred by Scylla’s silence. “You tell me everything I need to know about the Spree,” she began, “their plans, this safe house-” she paused, contemplation in her eyes as she changed course, her body turning and heading toward Scylla this turn, her voice taking on a more serious note as she stared down the brunette. She came to rest two feet from Scylla’s face, their proximity igniting a warmth in Scylla that was so out of place given the gravity of their situation.

_ Focus, Ramshorn. _

“Actually,” the blonde continued, her eyes sharp and scrutinizing as they roamed Scylla’s form, “how about we get to know each other a bit better first, yeah?”

It took Scylla a minute before she understood what Raelle meant. One second, before cold hard panic seeped into her veins. Time seemed to slow as Raelle reached for her. The hands coming closer and closer to Scylla’s face, a clear and present threat. This was it. Her hands were bound and she had no escape. Her worst fears were coming to life before her eyes. Raelle was going to unmask her and everything would come crashing down around her. It was all over and she was powerless to do anything about it. She squeezed her eyes shut in anticipation, her entire body tensing as if waiting for impact, for the hands that had once promised her a safe harbor and a place to rest to be the same to rip it all away in an instant.

Time seemed to slow as she waited. Raelle’s hands moved imperceptibly closer as her mind ran a mile a minute, her thoughts cascading down on her psyche like a punishing waterfall of fear, and grief. So much so that it took her a moment to realize that those same hands should have made contact already. She waited a moment longer just to be sure and still, nothing. She cracked an eye open only to be confused by the sight before her. Raelle was still standing before, still as perplexed as before but, something had changed in her stance. Threatening hands that were heading toward Scylla’s mask mere seconds before were now held in the air in...in  _ surrender? _ As relieved as she was with this sudden turn of events she was still confused.

Raelle had her dead to rights in every sense of the word. She was completely at the blonde’s mercy. Then again, if that was the case, why would she-

And then her hands fell to her sides,  _ released. _ She rubbed at her wrists as she looked around for her savior.

_ Porter? _

She had never been more relieved to see him in her life. He had saved her in more ways than he would ever know. Her relief ran out pretty quickly, however, when she noticed the reason for Raelle’s tense stance. Porter had his gun out, and its barrel was pointed directly at Raelle.

_ Shit. _

“Well, well,” he began, “looks like you’re in a bit of a situation here, agent.”

There was something about the way he spoke that made Scylla think he was enjoying this a bit  _ too  _ much and it unnerved her for reasons she couldn’t comprehend. She had been on missions with Porter before and he had always seemed to enjoy the job, but there was just something in the undercurrent of his tone this time that made her skin crawl, not that she’d show it. Those were thoughts for another time. Right now, she had to focus on making sure Raelle got out of this, preferably without a bullet.

“So here’s what’s gonna happen,” Porter continued, completely ignoring the icy glare Raelle was sending his way. “You’re going to turn around, I’m going to put these cuffs on those wrists of yours and then you, me, and my partner here are gonna go for a little ride. Sounds good?”

Raelle remained silent, her only response an almost imperceptible tightening of her jaw that had Scylla praying to every god that would listen that she didn’t do anything stupid.

They didn’t listen.

The moment Porter had placed the first cuff on Raelle’s wrist and lowered his gun to focus on the other, Raelle had bucked, throwing him off balance and putting enough space between them for her to go on the offensive.

She was a sight to behold. Raelle fought with everything in her, her size and speed giving her an early advantage over her opponent. Scylla gritted her teeth as she watched Porter begin to get his footing back, his size and power easily leveling the playing field after Raelle miscalculated and took a heavy blow to her abdomen. Her movements slowed and Porter took full advantage, sending a flurry of blows her way, the final of which had her doubled over trying to catch her breath.

Porter stood over her for a moment, a hunter watching his prey. Satisfied the fight was over, he went behind her once more, hoisting her up by her arms and attempting to bind them once more. 

That’s when it all went wrong.

Scylla had approached them after the fight, her mind already running scenarios on how Raelle could ‘escape’ her captivity once they were on the road. She had come to the conclusion that she would simply release the blonde at some point on the way back to HQ, roughing herself up a bit to make the story more believable before returning herself. It was as good a plan as any, and it may have even worked, that is, if Raelle hadn’t broken Porter’s nose in one final attempt to escape. Honestly, the whole thing would have made Scylla laugh if not for the annoyed backhanded slap the blonde received afterward that sent her back to the ground, a slightly self-satisfied smirk on her bloodied lips.

Porter growled as he pulled Scylla’s sidearm from its holster and aimed. Scylla grabbed his arm, trying to calm him, reminding him of their orders.  _ No kill shots _ , that was their directive.  _ Use force only as necessary and capture if possible _ . Scylla reminded him of all these things, but none of them seemed to make their way into his consciousness as he shrugged her off, pointing the gun right back at Scylla’s whole world and firing. 

Two shots echoed through the night followed by a soft thud.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know, I know, I’m LATE late and I’m sorry, I’m trying my best but life’s gotten real busy but I’ve not forgotten about you all and I’m still here and will be for a long time....I just might not have a set schedule so much especially during those really busy weeks.
> 
> Anywho, hope you enjoyed!


	12. Déjà Vu And Other Sports

All hell had broken loose.

Silas sprinted his way over to where his sister was stationed. His breaths were even, but his pace had quickened with the urgency of the situation. He couldn’t believe that the FBI had gotten the drop on them. They were supposed to have the advantage. That was what mattered, right? They were on their turf and yet it had _ still _ all gone to shit.

He made his way through the forest, trying his best to avoid the dried leaves and twigs below and draw as little attention to himself as possible, but it was difficult. Scylla had gotten cut off before he could get a full assessment of the situation. He had waited and waited, but all he could hear on the other end of the comms was static. He had finally lost all of his patience when he heard the struggle, slowly making his way over. He picked up his pace when he heard Porter show up. 

He had never liked the guy from the start. Liked him even less when his sister started dating him. What did she see in him, anyway? He’d always kind of rubbed Silas the wrong way. Always so rash. Sure, he was pretty good at his job. A good guy to have on hand in a pinch but, for missions like this, missions that required a more  _ delicate  _ touch...he was a bull in a China shop and now, he was with his sister.

He slowed his pace as he got closer to his sister’s position. He lowered his stance, taking slow, deliberate steps and keeping his senses tuned to his surroundings as he tried to get a feel for what was happening. 

_ No fighting. That’s a good sign...right? _

He was never one to believe in superstitions but, after tonight, he might make an exception for  _ jinxes _ .

His blood ran cold when the first shot rang through the air. The second was like a jolt of white-hot electricity to his brain, spurring him into action. His body shifted into high gear, his legs carrying him forward at a dead sprint. Even breaths became pants of exertion as he raced through the forest toward the source of the sound that was now on repeat in his head.

_ No, no, no.  _ He pleaded,  _ not her, not today, please. _

He closed the distance between himself and the clearing. All he could see in his mind was his sister’s face, staring up at him from the ground, paler than usual, her eyes-

He came to a screeching halt at the edge of the trees, a soft thud replacing the recurring crack of gunfire in his head as he stared, mind momentarily blank at the scene before him.

Porter looked horrified, his gun falling from his grasp as he fell to the ground. The blonde FBI agent before him looked more determined than ever, if only with a twinge of regret in her eyes that Silas was convinced he had imagined. Never before had he been so happy that before leaving, the team had decided that as the only trainee on the mission, he would be given non-lethal weapons only. 

He reached into one of the slots on his belt, pulling out a smoke grenade before pulling the pin and saying a quick prayer to whoever would listen before lobbing the grenade toward the trio.

A flurry of coughs, sputters, and curses erupted once the device opened, releasing a thick plume of smoke into the air. Silas took advantage of the confusion and rushed forward in the direction he remembered his sister was. He waded through the smoke for a bit, visibility only a minor issue before he stumbled upon the pair, Porter coughing up a storm and his sister... _ his sister. _

_ No _ , he chastised himself, pushing the thoughts and the cold fear they brought with them to the back of his mind as he gathered the two up. He positioned Scylla between them as he led the way back into the forest. 

The trio made it back into the tree-line before the smoke cleared, a cautious sigh of relief on their lips as they made their way to the agreed-upon drop point.

_ She’s okay,  _ Silas kept repeating to himself,  _ she  _ has _ to be okay _ .

**_______________**

Raelle coughed and sputtered as she stumbled her way through the still dissipating smoke.

“Damnit,” she cursed.

She had made it out of the blinding smoke only to find that the Spree agents had disappeared into the night.

_ “Rae?” _ came a voice over her earpiece.

“ _ Raelle, come in, what’s going on? _ ” came another, more worried than the first.

Raelle took a deep, calming breath before touching her finger to the earpiece.

“Yeah,” she began, “yeah, guys, I’m okay.”

She could almost hear her unit sigh in relief, could even imagine Abigail’s face as she tried to hide hers and the image brought a small smile to the blonde’s face.

“ _ Rae, get to the house immediately. We have a situation _ ”

“Dammit all” she whispered, sparing one last glance toward the empty expanse of the forest before jogging her way up to the safehouse.

Raelle groaned when she finally got to the safe house. The defeated looks on her unit’s faces told her all she needed to know about the state of their mission.

They had failed.  _ Again. _

The safehouse had been emptied. Well, parts of it had been anyway, and the rest was black with...ash? No, it couldn’t be. If there had been a fire, they would have seen it, especially on a scale this large, and on top of that, how did they manage to  _ control _ it? The more she looked around, the more she noticed that the char marks were in very specific places, almost as if the ‘fire’ had jumped from place to place, only touching and destroying what was required of it.

A memory, small but very powerful, needled at the back of Raelle’s consciousness. This all felt kind of like  déjà vu, like she had seen this before but...she just couldn’t place  _ where. _

“What the hell happened?” she asked a little more harshly than intended, but it was warranted given the scene before her.

“We got ambushed by a couple of sentries on our way here,” Tally began, “Two guys, by their size. They got in a couple lucky blows, but one of them randomly took off in the middle of our fight, which made the other one pretty easy to take down after that.”

_ One of them took off...I wonder if- _

“Yeah,” Abigail continued, “tied him up and then tried to make our way here as fast as we could, but by the time we arrived, there was nothing left. Thought we saw someone heading into the forest so we went to investigate...that’s when we heard the shots and started heading back.”

“When you finally answered your comms, we figured at least it wasn’t you who got shot, so we came back to the house to see if there was anything salvageable left behind but...well, you know the rest.” Tally finished, halfheartedly gesturing to the mess before them.

Raelle released a deep sigh, her frustration bleeding out as the exhaustion of the night’s events started to bare down on her. “I think I know where your mystery guy went off to,” she began, piquing the interest of her unit mates.

They did a quick search of the house on the off chance the Spree agents had left  _ something _ behind for them to go off of. They hadn’t. Raelle spent the rest of the night and the drive back recounting her bizarre encounter with her own pair of Spree agents.

“Wait,” Abigail interjected, “so, you’re trying to tell me that one of them actually  _ saved _ you?” she asked, incredulity layering every word.

“I-” Raelle cut herself off, the words sounding ridiculous on her tongue as she uttered them.

_ Had _ she been saved by a Spree agent? It had seemed so in the moment, but she couldn’t be sure. She turned those few seconds over in her head again and again, her heart racing each time as the memory, still fresh, brought all the emotions she had been feeling right to the forefront of her mind.

*******************

_ She had been staring down the barrel of a .45, no escape possible as the forest went quiet, save for the soft crunch of soil beneath a boot as the other Spree agent, the one she had initially captured, approached the pair. She watched as the smaller agent whispered something to the one before her. Raelle took advantage of their distraction to try and reach for her own gun, but that had been a mistake. The taller agent’s attention returned to her in an instant. Shrugging off his shorter counterpart, he released the safety of the gun, aiming straight for her head as his finger squeezed the trigger. _

_ All Raelle could think about was the irony of the whole thing. How long had she been chasing the Spree? She had faced worse odds than this, stared down more deadly situations than one agent in a forest with a gun and lived to tell about it, yet the moment she had finally found what she was looking for, when she could finally imagine a life, a real life outside of all this, a life that, by some miracle, had brought Scylla back to her? She was about to lose it all. _

Well,  _ she thought, _ if I’m gonna go down, I’m sure as hell not going alone.

_ She drew her gun anyway and aimed, squeezing her eyes shut and her trigger tight as she heard both guns go off. _

_ Raelle opened her eyes a second later, shock and confusion registering before anything else. She was  _ alive _. More than that, she was unharmed. _

But...but how? _ She wondered. Both guns had gone off, it was impossible for anyone, even a beginner, to miss from this range, but the truth was still clear as day. Raelle was still breathing, still unharmed and- _

_ That’s when she saw it. Her mind struggled to comprehend the image before her. The shorter Spree agent was now standing in between Raelle and her counterpart, one arm grasping his wrist as she held it in the air while the other hovered over her side where a dark splotch had begun forming on her already dark outfit. _

What the-

_ Raelle didn’t have time to finish the thought. Time sped up just then, the agent fell to the ground, their partner going with them in an effort to cushion their fall. Raelle was still scrambling to understand what the hell was going on when she heard the distinct sound of something metallic rolling on the gravel below them. A thick cloud of smoke enveloped the entire clearing, obscuring everything from view and allowing them to escape. _

*******************

“I don’t know, Abs,” Raelle finished, it was all very bizarre, and honestly, the more she thought about it, the more it gave her a headache.

They pulled into the parking lot at headquarters a few minutes later and Abigail cut the engine. None of them moved, probably as consumed in their thoughts as Raelle was.

She sighed, “Look, guys, we don’t know what happened tonight.”

“That’s an understatement,” Abigail interjected.

Raelle gave her a look but otherwise did not comment and just continued, “We don’t know why that guy suddenly left you guys alone and came after me. We don’t know why that one agent saved me, and most of all, we don’t even know how they escaped.”

“Then what  _ do _ we know?” Tally asked.

They were all silent for a moment, contemplating her question.

“We had just gotten the location of that house from that guy  _ yesterday _ right?” Abigail began.

“Yeah,” the rest of the unit answered, a little confused as to where she was going with this.

“Well, think about it, if they were already planning on packing up before we got the info, they would have been  _ long gone _ by the time we even showed up. Not like they haven’t slipped us before, right?”

“ _ Okay,  _ so, what?” Raelle asked, urging her on.

“ _ So, _ ” Abigail continued, “this move was sloppy. I mean, if it hadn’t been for the shots and the ambush, we would have probably caught a couple of them at the house, which means this had to have been a last-minute thing.”

A collective lightbulb went off in their heads as they caught on to their unit leader’s train of thought.

“Maybe you’re right, Abs,” Raelle acquiesced, cutting off whatever snide remark the brunette was about to make as she continued. “ _ If _ you’re right,” she amended, “what does it all mean? I mean, the only way they could know that we know is-” 

“The files,” Tally whispered.

Raelle groaned, face planting into the back of Tally’s seat as the realization dawned on her. The files that had gone missing from her safe a month ago. 

_ Of course...of COURSE! The Spree must have finally decoded those stupid files and figured out that we had intel on their safehouses. _

She groaned again. “Of course…” she let out a dark chuckle, “of course they decoded the files because what else could possibly-” 

“Rae?” Tally called, slight concern in her voice at the blonde’s sudden silence.

They could see the wheels turning in her head, questions and answers flitting their way across her face as she began putting two and two together.

“Collar, say something,” Abigail demanded, “what’s going on in that head of yours?”

“It couldn’t have been the files,” she whispered.

“What?”

She shook her head, eyes focusing on her unit as the realization dawned on her. “It couldn’t have been the files,” she repeated.

“How hard  _ did _ you hit your head in that fight, Rae?” Abigail asked, “It had to have been the files, how else would they know what safe houses we know about?”

Raelle sat up straighter, her mind churning as it worked to untangle the informational web it had stumbled into. 

“No, no, listen,” she began, leaning forward and ensuring she had their undivided attention. “Sure, they got the info on  _ all  _ the houses we knew about from the files, but there are  _ hundreds _ of them in there.”

“Right, and this was one of them,” Tally acquiesced.

“Exactly. But, how did they  _ know _ we were going after this one specifically? How’d they know we were doing it  _ tonight? _ The files have nothing on that. Hell, this plan was about as last minute as we ever do it so...how did they  _ know? _ ” she finished, eyeing them both as she waited for them to catch up with her train of thought.

Realization seemed to hit them both simultaneously as their previously blank stares focused back on the blonde.

“They couldn’t have.” Tally surmised, “Not unless-”

“Not unless they had someone on the inside,” Abigail finished.

Raelle nodded in agreement. 

_ “Guys, I think we have a mole in the agency.” _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Is it déjà vu?  
> That's the only hint I may or may not be dropping about where this is going.  
> Maybe I'll drop a few more down the line. Who's to say, I honestly decide these things as I'm writing ;).
> 
> Anywho, hope y'all enjoyed that!  
> drop a comment below and lmk where you think Raelle is getting this sense of déjà vu from👀...also...if you have any predictions I would love to hear them!  
> As always, thank you guys for sticking with me, it means a lot.  
> Stay Hydrated <3
> 
> See you next time!


	13. It's a cold heat kind of night

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A little introspection (okay a lot)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! Remember me? :)  
> Okay okay, I know it's been a while, and I'm sorry.  
> I got a new job and things have been a lil disorganized for a while.  
> BUT we're rounding that corner, things are falling into place and idk how much more I can say without spoilers so I'll just ask for your forgiveness and promise that if I do end up on a break again it won't be 5 weeks long 😬😅
> 
> Enjoy!!

Silas all but kicked the door in as they stumbled their way into their apartment’s living room. He couldn’t really bring himself to care about the noise they were making or the attention they may be bringing to themselves as he was too preoccupied with the pallor of his sister’s skin. The reddish shade of the blush that once resided in her cheeks now stained his hands and both of their clothes as she lay prone on their couch. 

The agency had sent over one of their doctors as soon as he had called it in. They tried convincing him to take her back to base, but, in all honesty, he wasn’t sure if she could wait that long. He had even been contemplating breaking all protocol and taking Scylla to a real hospital before the boss relented and assured him a physician would be waiting upon their arrival.

He sat as close to her as he was allowed, his eyes never leaving her face, watching, always watching, for even the slightest hint of a sign that things were taking a turn. Whether it was for the worse or for the better, he did not know, all he  _ did  _ know, however, is that they almost did it again. The FBI had come for his family,  _ again _ and this time they had come for his sister. They had come for  _ Scylla. _ Scylla who had basically raised him, who had been his rock, his  _ home _ when the word still seemed foreign to a younger version of himself.

The younger Ramshorn wasn’t sure how much time had passed, too caught up in the swirl of his own thoughts to really register much except for the constant murmur of voices around him and the soft clang of what he assumed were medical tools.

He started as a hand came to rest on his shoulder, the doctor kneeling to meet his eyes as he spoke.

“Your sister’s gonna be fine, Ramshorn,” he reassured.

Silas released a breath he didn’t know he was holding, blurry eyes drifting from the doctor’s over to his sister’s pale form. His anxieties gnawed at him once again.

_ If she’s okay, why isn’t she awake? _ He wondered.

As if reading his mind, the doctor followed his line of sight and sighed, bringing the boy’s attention back to him.

“I managed to remove the bullet and stitch up the damage, but,” he paused, contemplating his next words, “your sister’s been through a lot over the years, Silas. She’s had her share of fights and injuries, mostly minor but, things like that? Sometimes they add up.”

Cold fear began trickling down his spine as the doctor spoke. “What does that mean?” Silas asked, doing his best to push that cold feeling as far away as he could.

“Long story short?” the older man asked, continuing after Silas nodded, “The more times she has to go through something like this, the longer these things’ll take to heal until eventually...”

He didn’t finish the thought. He didn’t need to, Silas knew what he meant, simply nodding once more in acknowledgment before making his way to his sister’s side where he vowed to stay until she stirred.

_ Come on Scyl, you have to wake up...Please, _ he pleaded internally.

**_______________**

_ There was a mole in the agency. _

_ There was a mole in the agency? _ Raelle thought, turning the phrase over and over again in her head, willing it to make sense. It didn’t.

_ How was there a mole in the agency? _

Say what you will about the FBI but it was the most secure place Raelle knew, especially once Anacostia became director. Their fearless leader was meticulous almost to a fault. She dotted every ‘I’ and crossed every ‘t’, so, how on earth did they end up with a mole in the agency? Even worse than that, how  _ long _ had they had a mole in the agency? How many of their ops had failed because there was someone on the inside leaking information to their enemies? How much did this person know about their operations? About  _ them _ in general?

Raelle’s spine tingled as a pair of deep blue eyes flashed through her mind. She hadn’t seen Scylla since their coffee date almost a week ago. She had even tried knocking on the brunette’s door just to make sure she was okay but had never even gotten past the threshold; cold silence or an even colder stare down by the younger of the two siblings meeting her each time. Couple that with this newest revelation, to say that the blonde was on edge would be an understatement.

She sighed, apparently a bit too loudly, as a reassuring hand gave her knee a squeeze. She looked over at its owner, Tally, ever the intuitive one among them giving her an understanding glance.

“Craven, Collar,” Anacostia boomed from the front of the briefing that Raelle had honestly not been paying the slightest attention to. “Are we boring you?”

“No ma’am,” they responded, straightening up a bit more in their chairs as they met Anacostia’s searching gaze before she returned to the presentation she had been giving.

Apparently, the agency had actually made a few strides over the years in identifying players in the Spree’s organization, some with names, some with faces, and even some with neither, only an alias and a blank generic icon in their place.

Raelle did her best to push her worries away and focus on the briefing, noting the faces or the names and who they were as their fearless leader spoke, and that’s when she felt it. Anacostia had just gone over the aliases of two scientists. No real names, no faces, no information other than that, at the time, the agency was working on flipping them on the Spree. Apparently they had been working on a weapon of some sort and were starting to have some reservations when it came to their former employers’ ethics and it looked like they were about to leave when-

“What happened to those two?” Raelle found herself asking.

The room fell silent, Anacostia’s stare pinning her to her seat once again. Raelle really hated when she did that but she suppressed her sigh in favor of receiving an answer to her question. Something about those two was raising alarm bells in the blonde’s head and she wanted to know why.

“We don’t know,” Anacostia answered. “The team in charge had secured a safe house for them, after which they would deliver the Spree’s plans to us, but when it came time for the rendezvous, they never showed.”

There was something here and Raelle knew it. She was on the precipice of something but... _ what was it? _ “When was the last time we had contact?” she asked.

Anacostia quirked an eyebrow at her sudden burst of curiosity but answered her question anyway. “About 10-ish years ago.”

**_______________**

Raelle’s week only got more bizarre from there.

The two Spree agents from their debriefing had needled their way into her mind and refused to leave. Her instincts told her there was something missing, a puzzle piece lost to time that they just weren’t seeing and it nagged her to no end. On top of all that, Scylla had pulled another disappearing act and the uncertainty of it all was driving her nuts. So much so that she had finally bit the bullet and knocked on the brunette’s door a few days ago, only to be met by the coldest stare down she has ever had the misfortune of receiving.

She wasn’t a stranger to cold stares. She put bad guys away for a living after all, and many of them (all of them) were never too happy about it, so the blonde had been on the receiving end of quite a few. This, however? This one was personal, it was as if she had  _ personally _ offended the younger boy, but for the life of her, she couldn’t figure out how.

She closed her eyes, a deep sigh escaping her lips. Yeah, it was definitely a mess.

“Collar!”

The abrupt interruption to her thoughts caused her to jump a foot in the air, leaving her organs behind as she turned to find the culprit.

“Jesus, Bells,” she groaned, a hand pinching at her nose, “is there  _ any _ part of you that comprehends the phrase ‘inside voice’?”

The Bellweather just smiled, unashamed. 

“Is there any part of you that comprehends that your work day is over and we have movie night in a couple hours?” she shot back.

Raelle cringed.

_ Right. Movie night.  _

“You forgot, didn’t you?” Abigail asked, eyeing her.

“Did not.”  _ She did _ .

Her unit leader scoffed, “Right, well, regardless, you promised Tally and I am not taking the fallout for you bailing again so  _ you’re going _ .”

There was something deep inside the blonde that pushed her to disagree with the brunette. Something about the finality of her tone that stirred something rebellious inside her but she swallowed it. She  _ really _ didn’t feel like a unit movie night today, but as much as the thought pained her, Abigail was right. She promised Tally and had been putting it off for ages now. She at least owed the redhead that...and owed Abigail the favor of polishing off a bottle of her liquor that Tally had assured her would be there.

She raised her hands in surrender. 

“Alright, alright, no need to read me the riot act alright? I’ll be there.”

“Good,” Abigail responded as she began sauntering away. “Oh, by the way,” she began, pausing her retreat, “feel free to bring that girl of yours, too, if it'll sweeten the deal,” she finished, wiggling her eyebrows like some old cartoon villain.

“ _ Goodbye, _ Bells.” 

“Later, Rae.”

**_______________**

Five days. 

It had been more or less five days since they had gotten back from the mission. Five days since his sister had been laying here in her bed unconscious; since that stupid blonde agent had put a bullet in her. Silas clenched his jaw in an effort to hold back the anger that had been building in him for almost a week now. He didn’t have time for this. He needed to be here for Scylla and make sure she was okay. Collar and the rest of the agency would get what was coming to them soon enough, but for right now, all he wanted was for his sister to wake up and flick him on the forehead for wasting his time worrying about her when he had so many other important things to be doing.

He could almost hear her now. She’d call him stupid but the insult wouldn’t touch her eyes. They never did. They traded insults like the best of them but deep down he knew...they both did.

The ring of the doorbell interrupted his watch. He looked back at the closed eyes of his sister as he often did when things seemed amiss. In any other situation, their glacial blues would meet in contemplation, but for now, he was alone in his confusion.

_ Who the hell could that be? _ He mused.

When the bell rang again signaling that their  _ visitor _ was loath to leave, he slowly got to his feet, making sure to grab a weapon before heading to the door.

Silently, he approached the door, eyes sharp, mind alert and weapon raised as he made his way to the peephole. He crept up to the door and leaned in to get a look at who was there and jumped, a low curse escaping his lips. Because of who he saw on the other side. He totally did not get startled because said blonde visitor rang the bell for the  _ third time _ right as he had gotten to the door, anticipation and a touch of anxiety running through his veins. Not at all.

He tucked the weapon behind the door as it swung open, a slightly confused Agent Collar on the other side.

“Oh uh, hey, Silas, is your sister around?” she asked, eyes not-so-subtly scanning the room behind him.

_ Seriously? What kind of  _ covert _ agent is she? _

“No,” he responded, the door already halfway closed again as he turned from the questioning woman.

“Hey, wait!” Raelle called, her hand instinctively flying out to stop the door from closing. 

She took a step back as the brunette rounded on her, a glint in his eyes that she couldn’t understand.

_ Add that to the growing list of things I don’t understand, I guess. _

She cleared her throat, “Is...is she…” she sighed, unable to complete the thought, “Listen uh, could you tell her I came by?”

“Sure,” Silas responded, closing the door on the blonde agent before he said more.

He retreated back to his post by his sister’s side, just barely noticing the figures jumping around on the screen of the television that had been on for who knows how long now. He couldn’t fathom how his sister was managing to pretend to be in love with her mark. He had watched them interact, however briefly, whenever Collar came over to pick her up for their dates, and honestly? He was impressed. Half the time he himself wasn’t even sure it was an act...then again, she hadn't earned her stripes by doing nothing, he guessed. 

He turned his head toward the flickering screen in an attempt to focus on anything but his thoughts, half his mind still listening, still making sure that his sister was still breathing, still with him. 

So intent was he in his focus that he missed the movement in his periphery, the slight shift in breath as lidded blue eyes finally blinked open. 


	14. Playing With Fire

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> She's awake ladies and gentlemen!!

_Scylla looked around in amazement. The colors of their meadow looked as ethereal as they did all those years ago. She hadn’t realized how much she missed home until just now. Her eyes stung with unshed tears and she chuckled at herself for the weakness._

_“How did you find this place?” she asked, clearing her throat as she heard the familiar crunch of leaves behind her._

_“Oh, well, I was looking for a new trail to run and um,” she paused, scratching the back of her neck, “I uh, may not have been paying as much attention as I should have been and got a little lost on the way back to my car.”_

_Scylla laughed as she shook her head, “And how many times does that happen daily?”_

_Raelle huffed, “Hey, I always come back, don’t I?”_

_Scylla looked at her fondly, “Yes, yes you do.” Raelle looked over at her then, the sky meeting the waves as they shared some deep emotion neither of their vessels had yet named, intense and unyielding._

_As if waking from a spell, Scylla looked away again, clearing her throat, “So,” she started, “you got lost and found a magical oasis just outside the concrete jungle?” Raelle grinned,_ goddess how she loved that grin.

_“No.”_

_Scylla frowned, “What?”_

_“I didn’t get lost,” Raelle clarified, her eyes serious and boring into the brunette’s._

_“What...what do you mean?” she asked, an awareness scratching at the back of her mind the more she met Raelle’s understanding gaze. “Rae, how did we get here?”_

_The blonde broke eye contact to face the sky, or what little of it she could see through the thick canopy of trees anyways, and sighed, “You need to come back, Scyl.”_

_Scylla’s confusion grew._

Come back? Come back where? They were there together, there was nowhere she’d rather be what-

_Then, like a flash, it all came back to her. Images, broken but oh so vivid, flashing through her mind one after the other, connecting and forming a picture that Scylla wasn’t sure she wanted to see._

_Her legs buckled under their weight, under her_ own _weight as everything came rushing back. Raelle’s eyes, so soft, so caring, so confused when they met again after so many years apart, the slight furrow she’d get when Scylla lied to her, the way she’d tighten her lips to keep her questions in, not wanting to push too hard. Her brother, SIlas, so young, so innocent when they came to the Spree. She remembered every moment, every day she saw that innocence fade slowly from his eyes as he leaned more and more into the organization._

_Raelle, helpless on the ground as Porter pointed a gun at her, as Scylla’s body moved of its own accord because she couldn’t,_ wouldn’t _let another person she loved be taken by this conflict. The loud BANG as her life drained from her body, crimson coating her side as she fell._

_She tried hard to catch her breath as the images continued to come, Raelle’s soft touch on her shoulder the only thing grounding her to...to what? Reality?_

_“Am I...am I dead?” she asked._

_Raelle gave her a small smile, “Not just yet, beautiful.”_

_“Then what-”_

_“I told ya, Scyl, you just got a little lost.”_

_Scylla looked up, her eyes trying to focus through the panic, trying to commit every aspect of_ this _Raelle to memory. Of the Raelle that cared for her. The one that knew everything and yet somehow still held every bit of the love and affection she always did in her eyes, instead of the anger and hatred Scylla knew she deserved._

_“What do I do?” she choked out, hoping that this Raelle would be able to give her the answers she could never find for herself._

_Raelle smiled again,_ goddess she loved that smile. _“You have to wake up, Scyl._ ”

Scylla groaned as she blinked her eyes open, groaning at the sudden intrusion of bright light and sound into her once peaceful mind.

_Goddess why does waking up have to be so painful_ -

“Scyl!”

Her eyes snapped toward the sound just in time to see a body slam into her own. She winced as the sudden force pushed her back into her pillow and a sharp pain tugged at her abdomen.

“A little tight there, Sai,” she chided.

It took a moment for the younger Ramshorn to grasp her meaning but when he did he recoiled from his sister almost as if she had shocked him.

“Oh, no, sorry! Sorry,” he said, a sheepish look on his face as he settled back into the chair he’d set up by her bedside.

She smiled and leaned forward once more, bringing the young boy into a more careful hug.

He sighed as he sank into the gesture, burying his face into his sister’s shoulder before pulling away. Scylla could swear she heard a little sniff before he looked up at her, eyes and emotions a bit more settled.

“I just...I’m really glad you’re okay, sis.”

She smirked, “Awww, were you worried about me? I’m touched.”

Silas rolled his eyes and got up, heading toward the door, “Don’t flatter yourself, Scyl, I just wanted to make sure you didn’t go out by the bullet of your mark. Kind of a punk ass way to go, really. Call it, professional courtesy...”

The younger Ramshorn kept going as he made his way around the house, puttering about with a task that Scylla was too distracted to pay much attention to.

_My mark’s bullet? Raelle..._ her hand drifted toward her abdomen, down to the exact spot that stung with every twist of her body. _Raelle..shot me?_

Silas walked back into the room with two steaming bowls of what Scylla assumed was food, but as much as her body craved it, her mind had other concerns…

“What happened?” she asked, interrupting whatever line of conversation Silas was heading down. 

She thought she could see a flash of anger in his eyes before his expression settled into something a bit more somber. He placed his bowl by her legs as he pondered where to begin.

“I’m not completely sure how it all started,” he began. “I was trying to lose two agents down by the house when I heard your comms go out and then I started making my way over,” 

Silas had this far away look in his eyes as he spoke. It was as if he was reliving the whole thing moment by moment and it didn’t look good. 

“When I finally got there, I saw Porter pointing his gun at your mark, hands on the trigger and...”

Silas paused. The tension in his jaw and body increased exponentially as this particular part of the night replayed in his head; as if he was still there.

Scylla was getting antsy. The memory of Porter’s gun pointed at Raelle’s head, of the shots being fired…

She grabbed his arm with a little more force than necessary and loosened her grip when his startled and confused gaze ticked over to her.

“Sai, what happened next?” she asked, “Is Raelle okay?”

The confusion on his face was replaced with anger in an instant as he wrenched his arm from her grasp.

“Raelle? What does it matter if she’s okay?”

“Sai-”

“She _shot you,_ Scyl,” he exclaimed.

Scylla’s face remained blank as her suspicions were confirmed.

_So it was her..._ she chuckled, _I wonder if this counts as irony or tragedy._

“Why’d you do that, anyway?” Silas asked, his gaze, the piercing blue of his eyes made even more daunting by his intent stare as he waited for her answer.

She could look him in the eye. She knew she had maybe pushed her curiosity too far, and, although there was no turning back now, she still couldn’t tell him. How would he ever understand the fear, the cold, abject panic that ran through her body the second she saw Porter pull his gun? The way her body moved of its own accord, in order to save one of the only real things she had left of her life, of a life she had thought she could live without until faced with eyes as blue as the sky and jokes that were so horrible they ended up being hilarious.

She couldn’t. Just one more lie she was forced to tell. Just another piece of her soul chipped away. It was at times like this that she wondered exactly how much of _her_ was really left. How much more of herself could she chip away at before there was just nothing. Darkness.

Like a splash of cold water, or a tidal wave, dream Raelle’s words came rushing back to her, “ _you just got a little lost..._ ” she had said. It was funny how, even as a figment of her imagination, the blonde could still read her so well. Still _saw her_ to a degree that, not even she herself did sometimes and...she was right. Somewhere along the way, she had gotten lost. She had started spiraling and it was only a matter of time before that spiral brought one of her worlds crashing down around her and she couldn’t let that happen. There were too many others that would get trapped under the rubble. 

She needed an exit strategy and she needed it fast, but for now, one more lie would have to do.

“We needed her alive, Sai. The boss specifically said not to have any casualties as long as it was avoidable and that most definitely was,” she began, deciding to at least stick to a version of the truth.

“Scylla, you got shot!”

“And I survived!” she shot back, cringing a bit as her voice came out a bit sharper than intended. She took a deep breath before continuing, “Sai, we were given very specific instructions for the mission. Plus, you know how hotheaded Porter can be. I had to save him from himself”

She tried her best to keep a blank expression as Silas watched her in quiet contemplation. That last part may have been a bit of a lie, but it was as close to the truth as she dared walk and she hoped it would satisfy him until she could figure out their next move.

“Porter can be a little stupid,” the younger Ramshorn acquiesced, a small smile tugging away at his lips as he tried to fight it.

Scylla huffed. ‘A little’ was an understatement. His recklessness was part of the reason she had started opting to go on missions alone. Hell, it was half the reason she broke up with him in the first place...well, that and the fact that he wasn’t a certain blonde that Scylla was realizing more and more had never really left her heart.

“Can’t believe you dated that guy!” Silas exclaimed, full-on grinning now as he poked fun at Scylla’s taste in men.

They were both laughing now as the tension dissipated.

She shoved his shoulder, “Hey! The dating pool is a little limited when you are a world-class spy such as myself,” she said, overdramatizing that last part as she flipped her hair.

Silas rolled his eyes at his sister's theatrics before returning to his food.

They ate in silence after that, or rather, _Scylla_ ate in silence, only speaking when Silas would ask for the umpteenth time if she was sure she was okay. For the rest, she merely listened as he recounted the last week’s worth of events to her and her mind ran through all the unknowns that were threatening to bury her at any given moment.

There was a lot she was unsure of, that she didn’t know. 

She didn’t know how she would get out of all this unscathed, or how huge the fallout would be when it all eventually _did_ blow up but, regardless of all that she was sure of one thing. She had to go see Raelle. The blonde was many things but stupid wasn’t one of them. She would likely be more than a little peeved at Scylla’s radio silence and for more reasons than one, Scylla couldn’t live with that. She needed to know that she hadn’t just run off again. She had no clue how she would be explaining her absence this time but that was a problem for later. For right now, all Scylla had to worry about was putting on her shoes with this constant twinge in her side. One foot and then the other, and then she was out the door.

**_______________**

“What do you want?”

Scylla grimaced at the cold tone with which Raelle addressed her but swallowed her protests. She earned this one.

“Raelle, just let me explain, I-“

“Explain what, Scyl? Explain where you’ve been this past week? Explain why you haven’t answered any of my calls or my texts? Or why your brother lied to me when I _did_ try to come see you myself? Or-“

Scylla held back her shock as the blonde continued her tirade. Raelle had come to see her? When? And more importantly, why hadn’t Silas mentioned it? 

_Because he doesn’t know that you’re in love with your mark?_ She mentally answered.

_Right._

She tuned back into the conversation at hand, scrambling to find a way to calm the storm in Raelle's eyes before it swallowed them both.

“Raelle, Raelle, hey,” she called, reaching out to take the blonde’s hands in her own and flinching when Raelle took a step back. _Earned that one too_. 

“Raelle, I’m sorry,” she pleaded, her eyes never leaving Raelle’s as she spoke, “I am so sorry okay? I just-“ the lie got stuck in her throat as Raelle’s eyes focused on her. Why couldn’t she do this? Lying was part of the job, a job she had become quite adept at over the years but somehow, under Raelle’s icy gaze, her skills completely abandoned her. She sighed, closing her eyes, steadying herself for Raelle’s imminent rejection but unable to stop herself from at least trying to explain. “I got scared, okay?”

Raelle huffed, taken aback. “Scared. Really?”

It was as close to the truth as Scylla dared venture as the rest would surely do more harm than good so she steeled herself.

“Yes, scared, I-” 

“You see because I don’t recall you being scared of much of anything Scylla,” Raelle continued. “The Scylla I know-“

“Well I’m not the Scylla you knew okay?!” She shouted, losing what tenuous grasp she had on her emotions. This tended to happen a lot with Raelle...apparently in both directions. 

The blonde’s mouth snapped shut at her outburst, a small tinge of regret in her eyes as she continued looking at the woman before her.

“Okay, you’re right. I’m sorry,” she acquiesced. “Why were you scared?” 

Scylla sighed, running her hands through brunette locks before continuing, “I guess things just started to get very... _real,_ alright? That’s usually when things fall apart and I just...I’ve already lost everything once, Raelle, and I...I don’t want to go through that again, not with you and I-“

Her words were cut off when a pair of arms encircled her shoulders and pulled her into a crushing hug. She held on tight, sinking into the embrace and doing her best not to release the sobs that were scratching at her chest. She did, however, let a tear or two fall when Raelle’s fingers began massaging the base of her neck as they embraced, but neither of them said a word.

“You’re not going to lose me, okay?” Raelle promised, “Well...you’re not gonna lose me as long as you stop pulling this Houdini act of yours.”

They both chuckled, the air no longer thick with anger and fear and frustration.

“I just need you to be honest with me, Scylla,” she continued, pulling back so she could look the brunette in the eyes as she spoke. “It doesn’t matter what it is, you can tell me. I can’t be there for you if you won’t talk to me, okay? You gotta tell me what’s going on before that beautiful mind of yours takes you down the spiral,” she said, one finger poking at Scylla’s temple for emphasis.

She laughed. She did that a lot with Raelle too, the blonde always made her smile and laugh and feel like the weight on her shoulder was just a bit lighter. She sobered as she looked up into expectant blue eyes. _Honesty_ , that’s all Raelle wanted from her, she wanted her to be honest about her thoughts and emotions and well...everything. It was her only request, and it was the only thing Scylla could not give her, for honesty would only serve to break them both and the thought only served to bring a fresh prickle to Scylla’s eyes.

_What have I done? She deserves so much more than someone who’s lying to her at every turn._

_She deserves someone who can share every aspect of their lives with her, who can give of themselves as much as she does and accept her in turn without the looming threat of disappearing hanging over them both._

_She deserves better than what I can give._

_She deserves better than what I am_.

Scylla shook the thoughts away, Raelle was waiting for an answer and they wouldn’t help her give one and-

“Okay,” she heard herself respond. 

“Okay?” Raelle asked, staring intently into her eyes.

“Yeah, okay,” she confirmed, sinking back into the comfort of Raelle’s embrace, sighing with contentment as the blonde’s arms tightened around her.

“You know,” Raelle began, “If you want to make it up to me...I may have an idea or two...”

“Raelle!” Scylla snorted at the insinuation, swatting at the blonde’s arm.

“Ow! Hey, I wasn’t talking about that!” she laughed, easing back a bit to give the brunette the most innocent look she could muster.

“Right,” Scylla said, rolling her eyes. 

“Hey, you’re the one whose mind went down the gutter Scyl, I was just going to suggest a very wholesome night of movies, games, maybe, just _maybe_ mid to top-shelf alcohol,” she paused, “if you want, of course, you don't have to if you think it’s too much I mean, I’ll have two friends over too so it’s okay if not I just-”

Her rambling was interrupted as Scylla reached up and pulled her into a kiss.

“Breathe, Rae,” she commanded, smiling when the blonde took a deep breath in, exhaling a few seconds later.

Now that she had calmed Raelle’s nerves she had to worry about her own. Raelle was waiting for her answer and, as much as her first instinct was to agree to any and every request the blonde made, she had to think about this one a bit more.

On the one hand, she wanted to spend the night with Raelle, goddess she wanted to and would have in a heartbeat, but involving her friends? Likely her unit? That complicated things. It left _witnesses_ and she was already only barely holding on to her cover with Raelle as it was.

On the other? She was still injured. Granted she could move and function as normal but the moment she lifted her shirt or so much as bumped into something she’d be screwed. There was no way Raelle or one of her FBI buddies wouldn’t notice her pain.

She had to be careful, _very_ careful. This line she’d have to walk to survive this movie night was razor-thin and had zero chances of survival if she slipped.

Logically, she should go nowhere near it. She _should_ be smart and make up some excuse to bail but, it had been weeks since Scylla did what she _should_. 

“Sounds fun,” she responded, biting back a grin as Raelle’s eyes widened almost comically.

“Wait, really?” the blonde asked, failing to keep the genuine surprise out of her tone.

Scylla chuckled, “Yes, really Rae, I would love to come to your movie night”

“...with my friends?” Raelle pressed

Now _that_ part Scylla wasn’t too enthused about. It was the part that sparked her fight, or more importantly her _flight_ instincts the most. However, not wanting to add too many lies to the pile already laid between them, Scylla offered her the most honest answer she could.

“I get to spend the night with you Raelle, that’s all I care about.”

“And I thought I was the charmer,” Raelle grinned. 

_Goddess, she loved that grin._

“Oh no you still are,” Scylla replied, leaning closer as she continued, “I’ve just picked up a few tricks along the way” she finished.

Raelle snorted “Of course you have,” she said, before closing the distance between them and pulling the brunette further into her apartment.


	15. Into the fire (1)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's Movie Night people!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok, ok I know it's been a while and if you're still here with me? I love you <3  
> I also know my consistency went over a cliff and I have no excuse except that I got a new job and I really love it so I'm trying to do really good at it but, unfortunately, that sometimes means going an entire week without writing and yeah, it breaks my heart too because I love this story.  
> But! never fear, I promised I would finish it and that is 1000% what I'm gonna do!  
> Also...this chapter got WAY too long so,   
> I split it in two and will do my absolute best to have the second part posted by the end of the week.  
> Thank you guys for your patience, and for sticking with me, and now without further adieu...

“I still think you should have backup,” Silas grumbled.

Scylla sighed, “Sai, it’s just a game night, I’ll be fine.”

They had been having this argument for the better part of the last few hours, ever since she had told him about Raelle’s proposal. He had already been wary of the blonde to start and that disapproval had only grown after their last  _ outing. _

“Scyl, the last time these three were involved, you got shot! Our cover was almost blown and I...I almost lost you,” he finished, a hint of that fear leaking into his tone before he cleared it away. “Besides,” he continued, “that was just when they were separated, now they’ll all be in the same room together and you’re still hurt!”

All things considered, Silas was making some valid points and was it any other mission, any other  _ mark, _ Scylla would probably agree with him, and that was if she even bothered with the outing in the first place, but this wasn’t just any other mission or any other ‘mark’. This was Raelle. Sweet, charming, unbelievably understanding Raelle and when the blonde had looked at her with those eyes, Scylla hadn’t really had a choice in the matter. The smile on Raelle’s face after she had said yes alone would have made spending an evening with two people she loathed all worth it, but these reasons were all her own. They were selfish and she knew that, but she couldn’t help it. She wanted to spend as much time in Raelle’s light as she could before...

She cleared her throat as she finished putting her outfit together and turned to fully face her brother’s furrowed brow and worried stare, “Sai, I’ll be fine, I promise. It’s just down the hall and I’ll call if I need backup, okay?”

“Yeah, you better.”

“I’ve been in more dangerous situations and come out the other end just fine. It’s just a few board games and maybe a movie. Nothing to worry about,” she said to him but whether the words were more for his benefit or her own she was not sure.

She checked herself in the mirror once more, making sure any evidence of her extra-curricular activities were adequately hidden before turning to face him.

Noting the disapproving look on his face, she sighed. “Sai, I need to do this,” she began, placing her hands on his shoulders and waiting for his full attention before continuing. “I’ve been MIA for who knows how long now and  _ Collar _ isn’t one to let that go lightly,” she continued, proud of herself for remembering to not use Raelle’s real name with her brother. “Hey,” she called, bringing his eyes to hers as she put as much confidence as she could muster into her words. “I will be  _ fine. _ Okay?”

He sighed. “Okay. Yeah, okay just...promise me you’ll be careful, Scyl? First sign of anything suspicious and you get out of there, I’m not kidding.” he said with a sense of authority.

Scylla bit back whatever comeback her mind had conjured in response to her brother’s tone, the sincerity in his eyes disarming her to the point that all she could do was release a breath she hadn’t realized she was holding as she approached him.

“Okay. Okay, yeah, I promise.”

“Okay.”

**________________**

Raelle had been a mess all day.

She wasn’t sure why she was this nervous. She’d hung out with Scylla many times, both the old and the  _ new _ Scylla and it had gone great, more than great, usually, so there should be nothing to worry about...right?

_ Yeah, unless your insane friends spook her and she disappears again. _

_ Right...that… _

Raelle knew better than to underestimate the brunette, but after having known what life was like without her, she couldn’t help but worry and dread going back to that sort of existence.

She had cleaned and re-cleaned every visible (and some non-visible) surface in her apartment ten times over. The place had never looked so...shiny, for lack of a better term.

Hands fidgeting and mind racing, she was about to make it eleven times when a knock on the door drew her attention.

_ Pull it together, Collar, it’s showtime. _

She took a deep breath and straightened herself out before approaching the door. With a few more internal words of encouragement, she twisted the handle and just like that, all her nerves evaporated into thin air, the ocean blue of Scylla’s gaze washing over her with a warmth she had never experienced anywhere but with the girl before her.

“Hey beautiful,” she greeted, taking Scylla’s hand in hers and pulling the brunette in for a light kiss. The smile on Scylla’s face when they parted was worth more to her than any of her worries, so much so that she found her face stretching into one to match.

“Hi,” Scylla responded, slipping her hands around Raelle’s waist as she walked them both back into Raelle’s apartment. “Mmmm,” she hummed, her nose rubbing against Raelle’s, “I’ve gotta say, Rae, the apartment looks very...different now that I’ve actually gotten to see it.”

Raelle pulled back in confusion. “Scyl, you’ve been in my apartment plenty of times what’re you-”

She was silenced by soft lips moving against her own once more before the brunette began laughing. “Oh I know,” she began, Raelle’s favorite smirk firmly in place, “I’m just usually a little...distracted.” she finished, raising an eyebrow and chuckling again once the realization dawned across Raelle’s face.

Raelle hummed. “Well, who am I to break tradition?” she asked, tightening her arms around Scylla’s waist as she inched closer and closer to the brunette’s lips-

“Collar, open up!”

Both girls jumped at the unexpected interruption, Scylla looking up to see Raelle glaring at the door.

_ Bellweather. _

Raelle sighed, taking a step back and placing her hands on the brunette’s shoulders as she leveled her with a look. 

“You ready for this?” She asked. For all her worrying and planning, Raelle needed to know that Scylla was okay with this too. Sure, Abigail would be Abigail and Tally would be a little disappointed if she didn’t show but she would deal with them. This had to be Scylla’s decision.

Raelle waited in silence, her eyes never leaving Scylla’s as she watched the emotions play across her face. 

A few seconds later Scylla released a deep breath, resolution replacing the cacophony of emotions that had been swirling in the depths of her eyes.

“Yeah. Yes, I’m ready,” she confirmed. When Raelle didn’t move, her eyes still searching Scylla's, the brunette stepped into her space again and placed her hands on either side of the blonde’s face, looking her in the eyes as she spoke. “Raelle, I’ll be fine, I promise, okay? You’re here with me and these are your friends so, let’s go get them before one of them breaks down the door,” she joked and Raelle snorted, finally breaking eye contact as she took Scylla’s hand and led them both to the door where Abigail had been doing her best _ ‘I’m here to arrest you’ _ knock for the past few minutes.

“Little do you know...” she mumbled. “Here goes nothing,” she said as she put her hand on the door.

_ Let the circus begin. _

**_______________**

Their little party was in full swing and Raelle was in rare form with her friends.

Scylla watched silently as the brunette who she’d come to recognize as Abigail playfully traded insults with Raelle while the redhead, Tally, lightly moderated some of their more pointed jabs.

It was jarring. Scylla had a few acquaintances back at base: her brother and on occasion, when he wasn’t being a  _ complete  _ ass, even Porter, but this was something different, something warmer. This was family, Scylla realized. The thought had her clenching her jaw as she fought against the pinch that word still caused in her heart even now. She tried to keep the disdain off her face as she remembered that this ‘family’ was a part of the organization that had broken hers. They were the people that had left her and her brother alone in a cruel world, that had left them with nothing but broken pieces that would never quite fit together again.

Then she looked over at Raelle whose eyes were on her as they had sporadically been throughout the night. Always watching, a silent question behind her sky blue orbs coupled with the constant reassurance that Scylla could bail at any moment if things got too much for her. It was in moments like this that Scylla found herself doubting her convictions. Sure, the FBI had taken everything from her, had continued to take everything from a lot of people, some of them her comrades at HQ, but how could someone as pure as Raelle be a part of all that? Raelle, whose soft touches and warm words soothed even the deepest pains in Scylla’s soul, whose hands held her like she was the most precious thing in the world and promised nothing but safety to the brunette. 

How could she reconcile that Raelle with the one in the file she had been given? How could ‘Agent Collar’, the FBI’s most ruthless enforcer, who along with her unit, had taken down more of the Spree’s safehouses and supply vehicles than they would like to admit also sit here with a charming grin and soft eyes that made Scylla forget about the rest of the world. 

She shook the whirlwind of thoughts from her head as the din of the conversation faded from her ears. Gradually Scylla became aware of the lull in the conversation and the fact that everyone seemed to be staring at her expectantly.

“I’m sorry, what?” she replied, realizing that someone must have asked her something and it got lost in her internal storm.

The redhead, Tally, simply smiled and repeated her question. “I asked where you were from, Scylla? I mean, Rae’s told us so little about you that we were starting to wonder if you were even real,” she finished, deftly dodging the chip Raelle chucked at her in response to the tease.

Scylla chuckled at their antics. “Oh you know, all over,” she replied, noncommittally, “the longest I ever stayed anywhere was when my family lived in Boston. It’s where Rae and I first met,” she finished, absentmindedly reaching for the blonde in question and smiling when said blonde reached back.

“Aw, you guys,” Tally said, positively cooing at their display. Abigail simply rolled her eyes and continued fiddling with the slice of pizza she had been nursing for a while now.

“So, Scylla,” she began, leaning forward and turning the entirety of her attention to the brunette in question. “What exactly is it that you  _ do? _ ” she asked. The air of suspicion coating her words made Scylla’s hackles rise but she kept her face as placid as possible.

_ You’re doing this for Raelle, _ she coached herself, _ just stay calm _ , _ they have no reason to suspect you of anything. Why would they? _

“Oh you know, a little of everything,” she replied, eyes as sharp as Abigail’s as they stared each other down. “I’ve been traveling around for a while so I kind of just follow where the wind takes me.”

“Huh,” Abigail grunted, “so, what exactly happens when the ‘ _ wind _ ’ starts blowing again?” she asked, emphasizing the word  _ wind,  _ air quotes and all, as she spared Raelle a brief glance before returning her gaze to Scylla who was trying to keep a ‘deer in headlights’ expression off her face.

“Abi!” Tally chided.

“What? It’s a valid question!” she defended.

And it was. Unknowingly Abigail had struck the motherlode of all chords. She had hit the one thing that had plagued Scylla ever since the line between her duty and her heart had become so blurred she wasn’t even sure where it lay anymore.

What  _ would _ happen? She had been racking her brain for weeks trying to figure out a solution that didn’t end with everyone’s heart being broken...or with more than one of them dead, but as of yet, she hadn’t found one and it haunted her. The looming  _ what if’s _ of the future scared her more than she’d like to admit, and certainly more than she would ever let Raelle or her team know.

All at once the room started feeling too small, the air felt lighter and she couldn’t bring herself to focus back in on the conversation taking place around her.

“Scyl?”

She startled as a warm hand touched her shoulder and she looked over to see Raelle staring at her with the biggest look of concern on her face. She could see the panic mirrored in the clear blue of the blonde’s eyes and she couldn’t handle it anymore. She couldn't breathe, she needed some air, she...she needed an  _ escape. _

“I’m...I’m sorry I just-” and then she bolted.

**_______________**

“Scyl, wait!” Raelle called, but it was too late, the sound of her front door slamming was the only response she got.

The room fell into a dead silence as everyone tried to process what just happened...That lasted about twenty seconds.

“What the hell was that?” she asked, rounding on Abigail.

The Bellweather simply raised both her hands in a placating gesture. “Hey, all I did was ask a valid question, Rae. I mean come on, what do you even really know about her?”

“I know that I love her, Abigail!” Raelle exclaims, “I know I always have. I know that ever since the day she disappeared from my life there’s just been this thing, this feeling that nothing was truly right. I know that the day I bumped into her in this hallway I...” her throat bobbed as she tried to swallow the lump that had begun forming the more she spoke.

“Rae,” Tally tried, reaching toward her friend. She was promptly shaken off.

“No, Tal! Do you think she hasn’t thought of this? She told me day one that she wasn’t the same girl I knew back then and I accepted that. She thought I couldn’t love who she was now and we were actually getting past that. I could see it in her eyes, Tally. She’d stopped worrying about it so much and then  _ you, _ ” she said pointedly, turning her attention back to Abigail who was looking a little apologetic now, “just reminded her of all of it.”

“Rae I-”

“You what, Abigail?”

Abigail took a breath, an appropriately apologetic look on her face. “I’m sorry, okay? I didn’t know and I was just trying to look out for you. I don’t want to see you get hurt is all-”

“And what do you think is gonna happen now? Abs, you heard her, it’s not like she has anything truly holding her here and she-” she paused. Her voice was beginning to crack again as all the possibilities flashed through her mind. She squeezed her eyes shut as she thought of an empty house, a forgotten protection charm-

“Raelle,” Tally tried again, shaking her shoulders a bit in an attempt to pull her out of her head.

Raelle opened her eyes as she turned to face her friend. “I just...I can’t lose her again, Tally,” she said, her voice almost a plea, “I just...I can’t.”

“And you won’t have to,” came a voice from behind her.

Raelle turned to find that Abigail had vacated her spot on the couch to join them in front of the door.

Raelle scoffed. “What? So suddenly you’re team Scylla now?” she asked, still a little defensive.

Abigail contemplated her answer for a moment before responding. “To be determined,” she decided, “What I do know though is that  _ you’re _ my girl, Rae.” she said, placing her hand on the smaller girl’s shoulder. “You’re my family and if she is who you want, then I’ll help you find her, okay?” she paused, looking over Raelle’s head to Tally who was enthusiastically nodding along, “We both will.”

And Raelle loved her sisters, she really did, but they’d been standing here for who knows how long now, and depending on what Scylla’s plan of action was, she could literally be anywhere in the city right now. How would they find her before it was too late?

She voiced those concerns and was a little miffed when all she got in response was a snort from Tally. 

“What?” Tally asked.

“Wanna tell the rest of us what’s going on in that head of yours or...” Raelle trailed off. 

The redhead chuckled and rolled her eyes at her friend and, when the look of confusion on Raelle’s face deepened, she sighed. “Look, Rae, I may not know much about her but I do know one thing. I know that she really does care about you. A lot. My bet is she hasn’t gone  _ that _ far and is just probably looking for somewhere to cool off or something.”

“Listen,” Abigail began, turning the blonde toward her, “You stay here and wait to see if she comes back, okay?”

When the blonde went to protest, filled with too much nervous energy to just stay put, Tally tagged in once more.

“Hey, if she comes back before we find her, who do you think is most likely to talk her down? Us, or you?” she reasoned. 

On some level, Raelle knew they were right. Didn’t stop her mind from running a mile a minute over the possibilities, though.

Taking her silence as acquiescence, the brunette continued. “Okay, so Rae stays here and Tal and I will go check some of the parks, bars and whatever else around here and see if anyone’s seen her. Deal?”

Raelle sighed deeply. “Alright, yeah, deal,” she agreed. 

And with that, the trio set off on their assignments. Tally to the bars, Abigail to the nearby parks and coffee shops, and Raelle stayed in her apartment, intermittently checking the hallways for any sign of Scylla while she tried her best to keep her anxious energy under control.

She had all but worn a rut into her floor when a thought struck her. She stopped midstep, Tally’s words replaying in her head  _ “She can’t have gone too far...probably just went somewhere to cool off, gather her bearings” _ .

An idea was forming in the blonde’s head and her body reacted to it before it was even a full thought. Before she could even think, she had donned her coat and was out the door, her feet taking the steps two at a time as she made her way to the one place she knew, she just  _ knew  _ Scylla had to be. It was where she found her that day. She had seemed so sad then, so lost, but it was also where they found  _ each other _ again and the closer she got the more confident she was.

The door to their little rooftop hideaway swung open and sure enough, there she was. Raelle would never get over how beautiful Scylla was. She had accepted that, but there was just something about how...peaceful she looked up here that just stole the blonde’s breath away. Her face turned toward the moon and the stars as she searched for answers to life’s questions, how the light of the heavens would reflect in the deep blue of the brunette’s eyes giving them an almost otherworldly glow that would suck the blonde in whenever she had the good fortune of staring into them. 

She approached slowly, not wanting to spook the brunette, but as usual, Scylla noticed her before she could even get close.

“Just go away, Rae. I...I want to be alone.”

Raelle stayed her course, taking slow, deliberate steps until she was within reach of the brunette but still kept her distance. “I don’t think that’s true,” she responded, taking a tentative step closer to her love. “Hey,” she coaxed, placing a hand on Scylla’s shoulder. “Scyl, can you just talk to me, please? I-”

“What do you want me to say, Rae?!” Scylla exclaimed, shaking Raelle’s hand from her shoulder as she rounded on the blonde. Realizing her tone had been a bit sharper than needed, she took a deep breath and tried to avoid Raelle’s eyes. “She’s right,” Scylla whispered, “She’s right and we were stupid to think otherwise.”

Raelle didn't like where this conversation was heading. She could see the fear, the sadness in the droop of Scylla’s usually proud and confident shoulders and she wasn’t sure what to say or do to fix it, but she had to try. She couldn’t,  _ wouldn’t _ let this go, not without a fight, not without Scylla knowing how she really  _ truly _ felt about her. After all, when all was said and done? The only thing they really had was the truth. Come what may. 

Shaking off her own nerves and hesitance, she approached the frayed brunette with renewed purpose and spun her around so they were facing each other.

Scylla’s eyes dropped from Raelle’s face immediately, knowing that looking into those eyes would only hurt more as she began facing the hard truths she had been running from for months. Unable to look at what she would be losing. 

Raelle wasn’t having that.

“Scylla,  _ look _ at me” she demanded, her hands on either of the brunette’s shoulders as she waited for her to drag her eyes back up to meet hers. “What’s really going on in that head of yours?”

“I...” Scylla trailed off, the words dying on her tongue.

_ So much, _ she wanted to scream.  _ There is  _ so much _ going on and all I want to do is tell you everything and have us figure it out together but I just...I know you’ll hate me once I do. _

Tears welled in her eyes as she stared into the all-too-understanding gaze of the blonde. A gaze Scylla was beginning to imagine turning ice cold with hatred more and more each time she closed her eyes.

“Scyl?” Raelle prompted, a note of concern in her voice as she wiped a stray tear from the brunette’s cheek.

Scylla sighed, leaning into the touch and squeezing her eyes shut as she tried to hold on to as much of this moment as she could. When she opened her eyes Raelle was still there, still looking at her with all the love and tenderness she held in that too-big heart of hers. She hated herself. It was in that moment that Scylla well and truly loathed herself, and it wasn’t for the innumerable sins she had committed throughout her life, nor for the web of lies she had surrounded herself with that always seemed to be on the verge of unraveling. No, she hated herself because she was  _ weak. _

Here she was, alone with the love of her life and all Raelle was asking of her was the truth and she couldn’t even bring herself to utter a single syllable.

Sensing her struggle, Raelle stepped even closer, eliminating all space between them as she held Scylla’s face in her hands, her eyes boring into the brunette’s as she spoke. “Scyl, I don’t care about what Abigail said earlier, okay? I know you won’t hurt me-”

“But what if I do, Raelle?” she implored, almost hoping Raelle would see the hidden meaning behind her words. “What if I disappear again? What if-”

“Hey,” Raelle interrupted, her grip on the other girl’s face tightening as she tried to hold her together. “Do you really think I'd let you disappear on me again?” she asked.

Scylla closed her eyes in defeat and tried to extricate herself from Raelle’s embrace but the blonde held strong.

“No no no no, look at me,” she said, bringing Scylla’s eyes back to her own, “I don’t care what happens, I don’t care who this new Scylla is...well, I do I just...” Raelle sighed in frustration as her words failed her.

Scylla almost smiled. This was so vintage Raelle that it reminded her of simpler times. Of an adorable blonde fidgeting with her hands and fumbling over her words as she attempted to confess her feelings in the moonlight. It reminded her of peace.

Breaking out of her thoughts, she refocused on  _ this _ Raelle. Her hands were no longer fidgeting but Scylla could see the words turning themselves over in her mind as she tried to put them in the right order.

“Raelle-”

“I love you,” she blurted out, stunning the brunette into silence. Raelle squared her shoulder and looked Scylla dead in the eye as she repeated, “I love you, Scylla Ramshorn. And I know you don’t think that you deserve it, or that you changed too much for me to feel this way but I don’t care about that either,” she pushed on, ignoring the slightly incredulous look on Scylla’s face. “Scyl, I’ve felt happier these past couple of months with you than I have in years. When I’m with you, I feel like I can do anything like I’m really and truly alive,” she confessed, “Scylla, I don’t wanna go back to knowing what life looks like without you.”

The sincerity in Raelle’s voice alone would have been enough to break her, but the look in her eyes? That cautious hope for a future neither of them was sure was possible but both desperately wanted? It damn near broke her.

“I’m sorry,” Raelle continued, mistaking Scylla’s silence for indignation. “Look, I know we promised to take it slow and you don’t even have to say it back, I just-”

Her words morphed into a contented hum as soft lips swallowed all her doubts in a tender kiss. Scylla had reached her breaking point. She had been holding back her feelings for Raelle for months now because she always feared she would never be understood, that Raelle would take one look at her, at the  _ real _ her, and reject her.

Maybe it was the emotional turmoil of the night. Maybe it was the drinks she’d had coupled with the ever-so-charming words of the girl before her but Scylla was finally tired of hiding. She was tired of all the lies, of the secrets, of being on opposing sides with the woman she loved. She was tired of all of it.

When they finally broke the kiss, Scylla reached for her, the need to  _ feel _ Raelle, to be absolutely and completely surrounded by her warmth driving her. She stroked the blonde’s cheek, smiling at the contented sigh that passed between them as Raelle pressed a kiss to her palm.

“I love you too, Raelle,” Scylla confessed, and she didn’t need her eyes to see the smile that spread across Raelle’s face in that moment, as she could feel it against her lips as Raelle drew her in for another kiss.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Questions? Comments? Concerns? Predictions? 👀   
> Anywho, thank you again for sticking it out with me!!


	16. Into the fire (2)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Part two is finally here!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this one ran a little longer than I thought it would lol but ngl? I like it better :)  
> I think I might add a chapter or so to this in the end...stay tuned, we'll see after the next one, ya?
> 
> Anywho...enjoyyyy

Something shifted between them as they made their way back to Raelle’s apartment. The atmosphere surrounding them seemed calmer, didn’t have as much of a sense of urgency as it had before. It comforted instead of cautioned. It was Raelle, the safety and security Scylla always felt in the blonde’s arms now permeated the air around them and for this moment in time, she was content.

Raelle called her friends back to the apartment a little later and the movie night festivities resumed with no one except for the two lovebirds seeming to be aware of the change in atmosphere.

At least, that’s what they thought until Abigail and then Tally suspiciously excused themselves from movie night, citing a need to get back to their respective homes.

After a few brief goodbyes and a very strained, noncommittal apology from Abigail, Raelle’s friends departed, leaving her and Scylla to their own devices.

“Well,” Raelle began, “that was...fun.”

Scylla chuckled. “It was,” she agreed, moving to encircle her arms around Raelle’s waist, pulling her closer, “your friends are really nice,” she finished, laughing again when Raelle gave her a look of disbelief. “Okay, so I may have gotten off to a rough start with the Bellweather,” she chuckled, “doesn’t mean I don't appreciate how much she means to you. How much they both do.”

“Aww, is my little family circus growing on the mysterious Scylla Ramshorn?” Raelle teased, tightening her arms around Scylla’s waist when she tried removing herself from the blonde’s embrace. “No, no,” Raelle chuckled, “you stay right here, where you belong.”

The kiss that followed reignited the flames Scylla had done her best not to stoke on the roof given the party, and more importantly, the  _ company _ that had awaited them both downstairs. Now, however, alone and once again caught in the unyielding riptide that was Raelle, her body was alight with a fire that seemed to follow the blonde’s every caress, fueled by the dance of their lips on each other as their tongues darted out to taste the sweetness of the one thing in the world they each loved the most.

A soft moan escaped Raelle’s mouth as Scylla took the blonde’s bottom lip between her teeth, biting down gently before soothing it with another kiss. There wasn’t a single one of her senses that wasn’t filled with everything that was Scylla. The brunette was intoxicating. 

Without missing a beat, Raelle walked them both toward her couch, her mind too preoccupied to find its way to her bedroom. She swallowed a slight whimper from the brunette with another bruising kiss, pushing her to her back when her knees hit the arm of the sofa and following her shortly thereafter.

Scylla hissed as her back hit the sofa cushions, Raelle’s hands on her body now causing a slight discomfort that her lust addled brain didn’t comprehend. Not until Raelle’s feverish assault slowed and she eased herself off the brunette, a worried furrow in her brow.

“Are you okay?” she breathed.

“More than,” Scylla breathed back, reaching up in an attempt to re-establish the physical contact her body craved but Raelle pulled away even more.

Scylla sat up, following her movements with confusion. “Rae, what-”

“Is that blood?” Raelle asked, her face pale and stricken with guilt at even the possibility of having harmed the brunette.

Scylla remained confused for a second longer before, after having followed Raelle’s line of sight, dreaded comprehension broke through the fog that had overtaken her mind.

_ Oh, no. _

She swallowed, trying to keep the panic off her face and retracing every moment of the night trying to figure out what had happened. She did an internal diagnostic of her body and after a quick inventory, she came to the only conclusion that made any sense.

Her stitches had ripped. Not completely, apparently, since she was still conscious and neither Raelle nor her couch were currently covered in her blood, but they had ripped nonetheless.

_ Damn it,  _ she cursed.

She reached up once more, bringing Raelle’s attention away from her scan of Scylla’s body and back on Scylla herself. “Rae, I’m fine, I probably nicked myself on the balcony or the stairs or something, nothing to worry about,” she lied.

For a second, Raelle actually looked like she would drop it. Scylla missed that second because in the next one, Raelle said the one thing Scylla was really hoping she wouldn’t.

“Let me take a look,” the blonde insisted, easing herself completely off the couch this time. 

“No, wait!” Scylla exclaimed, grabbing on to Raelle’s arm with a little more force than intended. She cleared her throat, schooling her expression and her voice into something a little less suspicious as Raelle watched her. Once she was sure she wouldn’t accidentally out herself, she spoke again. “I'm fine, really,” she continued, joining Raelle on her feet, “I’m not made of glass, you know?” she smirked, “It’d take more than a papercut to take me out.” 

Raelle smiled at her bravado and leaned in to press another kiss to Scylla’s lips, “I have a first aid kit in my bathroom, Scyl, it’ll take like two seconds. Can’t have your brother hating me for returning you in any less than the condition I received you in, now, can I?” Raelle joked, pulling Scylla toward her bathroom again.

“Raelle, wait,” Scylla tried, pulling them both to a halt just outside the bathroom doors, “please,” she implored, “don’t.”

“Scyl, what’re you...” Raelle trailed off as a dark thought hovered at the back of her mind, one she really did not want to see the light of day because if it did, if she indulged it, then…

“Scylla, what are you not telling me?” Raelle asked, her voice betraying the fear that had started creeping in as that dastardly thought grew louder and louder.

“Raelle,” Scylla began.

“Scylla, why are you bleeding?” Raelle demanded. She needed to hear it. She needed Scylla to tell her it wasn’t true, to offer her an explanation,  _ any  _ explanation that would chase away the darkness that was beginning to seep through the cracks. The questions she refused to ask came back into sharp view the longer the silence stretched between them.

Raelle hadn’t noticed that she was moving, but her body acted before her mind caught up. Her hand, trembling with the weight of the truth she was about to uncover reached forward, pulling Scylla’s shirt from her pants.

“Raelle, please don’t,” Scylla begged once more, her broken plea falling on deaf ears as her love acted on autopilot. 

The brunette winced when Raelle’s other hand reached forward and removed the bandage that hid her stitched wound. Her stitched  _ gunshot  _ wound.

“Scylla,” Raelle began, her voice shaking with barely concealed emotion, “Scyl, I really need you to explain this because the things I’m coming up with, I...”

Scylla remained silent. Her eyes closed as her world crashed in on her. She had no more lies, no more half-truths that would get her out of this one.

“Scyl?” Raelle pleaded, her heart-shattering in her chest at the resignation in the brunette’s face. The tears streaming down her cheeks.

“Raelle, I wanted to tell you, I did, but-”

“No,” Raelle lamented, tears in her eyes “no no no no, Scylla don’t you dare.”

“Raelle-”

“No, Scyl!” the blonde cried. “No, I...how could you?” Raelle accused, her mind running over every moment of the last few months with new eyes.

“Raelle-”

“How  _ could _ you?!” Raelle screamed, rounding on the brunette.

Scylla took a step back, the pain and anger radiating off the woman she loved hitting her like a slap to the face. 

“Rae, I didn’t have a choice I-”

“You  _ always _ have a choice, Scylla. You were the one who told  _ me  _ that and you-” Raelle scoffed, taking a deep breath and looking past the brunette’s form before focusing back in her direction but never truly on  _ her _ . “You killed people, Scyl,” she finished, “innocent people.”

“I’ve never _ killed _ anyone,” Scylla said slowly, holding back her own emotions, “I never killed  _ anyone! _ ” she exclaimed, taking a measured step toward the blonde but stopping in her tracks when Raelle took a step back. “I was only ever a messenger,” she implored, “a spy when necessary...sometimes even a thief.”

If she was going down, at least she would go with Raelle knowing the  _ whole  _ truth and by the look on the blonde’s face, she did. She was putting every piece of this horrible, heartbreaking puzzle together as both their worlds crashed and burned around them.

“You stole the file,” she whispered in realization, a sad huff escaping her lips as the first mournful tear fell. “So what, was I just a mark to you?” Raelle screamed, advancing on the brunette, “I bet you thought it’d be so easy, huh? God, I was so stupid!”

“Raelle no, I promise it wasn’t like that, I-”

“Then why did you pick me?!” she exclaimed, “There are dozens of agents in my field office alone, some of them with the same or even higher clearance as me, so why  _ me _ ?”

  
  
  
  
  


“It wasn’t my choice!” Scylla defended, desperation in her tone, “I’m not exactly some criminal mastermind here, okay? I just...they handed me a file and-”

“Probably thought it would be your easiest mission yet, huh?” Raelle spat, getting in Scylla’s space before pushing past her with a scoff. “Probably had a good laugh at the poor idiot dumb enough to fall for you twice, right?”

“Raelle-”

The next sound Scylla heard sent a chill down her spine and a fissure through her heart. When she turned, Raelle had her gun pointed at her face, her eyes rimmed in red but cold as ice.

“Scylla Ramshorn, you are under arrest for crimes against the state as well as assaulting a federal officer-”

“Raelle, no,” Scylla cried, but Raelle never faltered. She approached the brunette, her spare pair of handcuffs already out as she continued to read her her rights.

“Anything you say can and will be held against you in a court of law-”

“Raelle-”

“You have the right to an attorney-”

And that’s when it happened. Maybe it was the click of the first cuff being secured around her wrist. Maybe it was just the intensity of the emotions coursing through her in the moment, but regardless of what the trigger was, Scylla snapped. As if on instinct, her elbow connected with Raelle’s solar plexus, causing the blonde to double over, dropping her gun.

She was horrified. “Raelle, I-”

She didn’t have time to finish her apology. Raelle recovered from the blow quickly and charged at Scylla, tackling her to the ground.

The brunette landed with a grunt, staring up into Raelle’s tear-filled eyes as the blonde attempted to keep her pinned while trying once more to secure her cuffs. 

Scylla knew that if Raelle took her in it would all be over. Everything. Her revenge plans for her parents, any chance she had of explaining this all to Raelle... _ Sai _ … Her brother needed her. She couldn’t,  _ wouldn’t _ let the FBI take her from him the same way they had their parents. Even if Raelle was the one doing it.

So she fought back. She bucked, shifting the blonde’s position a little lower before using all the strength in her body to flip them over, grasping Raelle’s wrists as they went and effectively pinning her to the ground.

Raelle bucked and kicked, trying to shift their positions but Scylla was prepared and the blonde’s movements were choppy and fueled by emotion so she held her ground.

“Raelle. Raelle!” Scylla gritted out, fighting to keep the blonde pinned, “Rae, please!” She begged, “please just, just stop okay? I need you to listen to me.”

“I don’t really care much what you  _ need, _ Scyl. Not anymore.” the blonde sneered, still struggling against Scylla’s hold which seemed to only get tighter the more she tried.

“Raelle, please just stop fighting me, I don’t want to hurt you, I-“

“You already have!” she spat, her voice breaking as her head dropped back to the floor and her movements ceasing as a single sob escaped her throat.  _ “You already have, Scyl.” _

Raelle stared up at the ceiling for a moment, contemplating, trying as best she could to stop the tears flowing from her eyes.

Scylla’s were closed. She reopened them when she heard Raelle take a deep breath, her icy blue irises focused on the brunette once more.

“The way I see it you have two options here, Scylla. You either knock me out and tie me up or you kill me, because that’s the only way you’re getting out of here without handcuffs on,” she finished, her voice devoid of the warmth it held only a few moments ago, devoid of any emotion really.

“Raelle, I could never-”

“Choose, Scyl.” Raelle interrupted.

She was at a loss, faced with the chilling of the star her world had always revolved around, would probably  _ always _ revolve around, and being given an impossible choice with severe consequences on either side.

On the one hand, she could temporarily incapacitate Raelle. TIe her up, cut her losses and return to base with her tail between her legs. There was a part of her, however, a small but not insignificant part, that told her that returning under these circumstances, a fugitive from the FBI with its most effective bloodhound on your trail might just be worse than not. On the other hand, a choice that she would never even consider because the mere thought of it would weigh on her soul heavier than any sin she could have committed in the name of her cause.

Scylla looked down once more into Raelle’s eyes, still brimming with tears as her jaw was set, watching, waiting to see what the brunette would choose.

“You said you’d love me,” Scylla whispered, “no matter what.”

The tightness in Raelle’s jaw loosened ever so slightly as she uttered the words that would haunt the brunette for lifetimes.

“I loved a lie.”

Scylla gasped. _Loved._ And just like that the last pieces of her heart, her world, shattered like glass in her chest, the pieces just as painful under Raelle’s cold stare. It was almost laughable that it was in a moment of love that she was exposed.

_ Maybe love really is a weakness. _

Shaking herself out of her thoughts, Scylla stared into an icy abyss. There was nowhere left to go, no corners to hide in, no half-truths that would get her out of this one. She had walked a razor-thin line and finally,  _ finally _ fell off into the fire below and even worse? She was taking the people she loved down with her. Raelle was already falling and Silas... _ Silas. _ The only family she had left, the one person she was supposed to be protecting who she had dragged into the darkness with her…

_ I’m so sorry, Sai. _

The thought of her brother brought everything into perspective for the brunette. Almost a decade she had spent on the run, moving from place to place, Identity to identity and then base to base...Her entire life so far had been built on lies, and as she watched it crumble before her, threatening to take everything and everyone she ever loved along with it, Scylla saw the one thing she had left. The  _ Truth. _

With one last look at the blonde beneath her, she exhaled a shaky breath, steadying herself as she made up her mind.

She stood, releasing Raelle from her grasp and offering the blonde a hand up. She stared at it for a moment before taking the offer and allowing Scylla to pull her up.

“What are you-”

“Okay,” Scylla stated, her voice flat as she offered the blonde her wrists “let’s go.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So...that just happened   
> Comments? Questions? Concerns?  
> Wanna just yell at me? haha

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for sticking with me this far, and for continuing to read and leave comments and kudos, it really does warm my heart <3!  
> I hope you're still enjoying it!  
> Feel free to sound off in the comments...or on socials, i'd love to hear your theories!  
> As always HUGE thanks to my beta for making sure I continue to make sense!!
> 
> Twit: @AlliWolf
> 
> Tumblr: @imperfectlyperfectnutcase
> 
> I'll see you guys next time!!


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